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AR15.COM
2/12/2009 8:50:57 AM EDT
From here...



PALO ALTO, CA - An international mathematics research team announced today that they had discovered a new integer that surpasses any previously known value "by a totally mindblowing shitload." Project director Yujin Xiao of Stanford University said the theoretical number, dubbed a "stimulus," could lead to breakthroughs in fields as diverse as astrophysics, quantum mechanics, and Chicago asphalt contracting.

"Unlike previous large numbers like the Googleplex or the Bazillionty, the Stimulus has no static numerical definition," said Xiao. "It keeps growing and growing, compounding factorially, eating up all zeros in its path. It moves freely across Cartesian dimensions and has the power to make any other number irrational."

Jean-Luc Brossard, a researcher with the European consortium CERN, said the number is so staggeringly large that it is difficult for even mathematicians to grasp, let alone lay people.

"The number itself is incomprehensible by human minds, and can only be theoretically understood in a fractional parallel universe which we refer to as the DC dimension," said Brossard. "The best way to understand a stimulus is to imagine a dollar sign followed by a packed string of hexidecimal nanodigits, wound into a triple helix, woven into a dodecahedron, and stacked on top of one another. Now imagine you were a black hole on the far edge of the universe, trying to escape the stimulus at 30 times the speed of light. The stimulus would still catch up to you and ram your black hole with such furious, repeated force that it would cause your entire reality itself to collapse."

Xiao said the team discovered the number with the help of an international network of 24 nitrogen-cooled Cray Ultracluster supercomputers, the CERN particle accelerator, and "three pounds of Humboldt County Chronic."

"The exciting news is that with more powerful computers and drugs, we believe we are on the verge of discovering an even larger number, which we refer to as a 'stimulusconferencebill,'" said Xiao. "Speaker Pelosi has already promised us the funding."

2/12/2009 8:51:58 AM EDT
[#1]
lol
2/12/2009 8:52:41 AM EDT
[#2]
i loled
2/12/2009 8:53:41 AM EDT
[#3]
Look I am not a math person,but I maintain that 0 is the largest number because as space is curved so is the linear from - infinity to + infinity.Carry on.
2/12/2009 8:55:10 AM EDT
[#4]
++    


Something is always larger.
2/12/2009 8:56:01 AM EDT
[#5]
2/12/2009 8:57:27 AM EDT
[#6]
How is this different from the old kid's saying "infinity +1"?

What am I missing here with my college algebra & statistics cap that says there is a point where you can't just add one more to whatever number you're talking about and have a bigger number?



eta, nevermind, just read the punchline.
2/12/2009 9:00:53 AM EDT
[#7]
This was recently applied by Economists when trying to figure how much money the end result of the "Stimulus" bill will be.
2/12/2009 9:23:34 AM EDT
[#8]
2/12/2009 9:39:52 AM EDT
[#9]
Rush Limbaugh needs to pick up on this.


CJ
2/12/2009 10:46:21 AM EDT
[#10]
2/12/2009 10:59:13 AM EDT
[#11]
Horsecrap. Whatever value for the Stimulus they toss up, I can add a billion to it.
2/12/2009 10:59:45 AM EDT
[#12]
LOL.
2/12/2009 11:20:04 AM EDT
[#13]
Looks like the bailout is infinity to the infinite power.


2/12/2009 11:27:07 AM EDT
[#14]



Quoted:


Xiao said the team discovered the number with the help of an international network of 24 nitrogen-cooled Cray Ultracluster supercomputers, the CERN particle accelerator, and "three pounds of Humboldt County Chronic."



I was chuckling all the way through, but this is where I finally lost it.



 
2/12/2009 11:28:27 AM EDT
[#15]
I think the author of that blog posts here quite a bit, or used to.
2/12/2009 11:59:59 AM EDT
[#16]
I want to laugh but I can't.
2/12/2009 12:02:38 PM EDT
[#17]
Funny, yet true.....in a bad way.
2/12/2009 12:06:41 PM EDT
[#18]
I was thinking WTF when I opened this.

Now I'm just sad.

2/12/2009 12:12:28 PM EDT
[#19]

2/12/2009 12:17:39 PM EDT
[#20]
I thought it came from The Onion at first.  



Is Dumpster_Baby's chart for real?  I hope not.  
2/12/2009 12:28:42 PM EDT
[#21]
It would be epic hilarity, if it wasn't so true.  As it stands it's still only pretty damn funny.  

That and I just wanted to see my new sig
2/12/2009 12:44:01 PM EDT
[#22]
That is some steaming big number.
Both of my CRAY supercomputers are down for maintenance right now, so   I just added ONE, and divided by "almost zero" so I have a bigger number yet, and I am all out of that Palo Alto stuff those guys are smokin.
 Imaginary numbers,  Fantasy Dollars....  system is crashing as we speak.
2/12/2009 12:49:05 PM EDT
[#23]
[Kip Dynamite voice on]

"..like anyone can even know that."
2/12/2009 12:49:59 PM EDT
[#24]
Quoted:
I thought it came from The Onion at first.  

Is Dumpster_Baby's chart for real?  I hope not.  



It is but it needs to be updated.
2/12/2009 1:12:38 PM EDT
[#25]
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
2/12/2009 2:33:13 PM EDT
[#26]
I hope we don't discover any more "bigger numbers" anytime soon!