Thompson facts > General Discussion

Posted: 5/2/2007 1:56:36 PM EDT

From IMAO

www.imao.us/archives/cat_fred_thompson_facts.html

And good ones from readers here.

www.imao.us/archives/007723.html/#comments

According to Sura 8 verse 65 of the Koran, Allah told the Prophet Muhammad, "O Prophet! Urge the believers to war; if there are twenty patient ones of you they shall overcome two hundred, and if there are a hundred of you they shall overcome a thousand of those who disbelieve... but if you're up against Fred Thompson, you're totally screwed and I can't help you."

Fred Thompson appears human sized because he is actually standing a million miles away.

The myth about the twelve labors of Hercules is loosely based on Fred Thompson Boy Scout career.

If you took Chuck Norris, Jack Bauer, Optimus Prime, a .50 caliber Desert Eagle, a samurai sword, nachos, the lobby scene from the move Matrix, the computer game Doom, and a DVD set of the complete A-Team series and somehow took all their awesomeness and compressed into one thing, you'd still only have something half as awesome as what Fred Thompson flushes down the toilet after taking a crap.

Fred Thompson often fills in for Paul Harvey and Batman.

Fred Thompson is a prime number.

Fred Thompson's firearm collection is so awesome that it's illegal in all fifty states and received a condemnation from the U.N.

What happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object? Fred Thompson appears out of nowhere and beats the crap out of both of them.

There's a lot more, I just picked out a few

Posted: 5/2/2007 1:59:05 PM EDT

[#1]

Sorry if I'm out of it but it doesn't seem like he's even a blip on the media's radar, is he actually going to run or what? They are talking about obscure guys I don't know much about but no mention of the more famous Thompson.

Posted: 5/2/2007 2:01:18 PM EDT

[#2]

Quoted:
Sorry if I'm out of it but it doesn't seem like he's even a blip on the media's radar, is he actually going to run or what? They are talking about obscure guys I don't know much about but no mention of the more famous Thompson.

Yeah... um... I'd say you're a little out of it.

He was on Hannity and Colmes this morning and he's been in SEVERAL polls recently.

Posted: 5/2/2007 2:03:08 PM EDT

[#3]

Quoted:

Quoted:
Sorry if I'm out of it but it doesn't seem like he's even a blip on the media's radar, is he actually going to run or what? They are talking about obscure guys I don't know much about but no mention of the more famous Thompson.

Yeah... um... I'd say you're a little out of it.

He was on Hannity and Colmes this morning and he's been in SEVERAL polls recently.

Okay then.

I don't watch the televised news much. I just saw a Republican candidate run-down on MSNBC today and he was not on there.

Posted: 5/2/2007 2:03:19 PM EDT

[#4]

Posted: 5/2/2007 2:09:52 PM EDT

[#5]

When Fred Thompson found out a Senator had added pork to a bill, Fred Thompson ripped off the man's leg and beat him with it. The leg was later returned to the Senator as part of a bi-partisan compromise.

* Every night before going to sleep, Osama bin Laden checks under his bed for Fred Thompson.

* Fred Thompson took over what was Al Gore's Senate seat, thereby dramatically reducing the Senate's carbon footprint. Fred Thompson then created carbon offset offsets by wastefully burning hippies.

* Though Fred Thompson left the Senate in 2003, Harry Reid still hasn't stopped wetting his pants.

Posted: 5/2/2007 2:15:07 PM EDT

[#6]

Quoted:
Sorry if I'm out of it but it doesn't seem like he's even a blip on the media's radar, is he actually going to run or what? They are talking about obscure guys I don't know much about but no mention of the more famous Thompson.

He is being talked about a lot on tv and radio the past weeks.

Posted: 5/2/2007 2:31:03 PM EDT

[#7]

Fred Thompson did not appear in The Fifth Element, because they would have needed to change the title to Fred Thompson.

A university is giving Al Gore a doctoral degree. Fred Thompson is going to teach him not to make the same mistake twice.

God created the universe in six days, just barely meeting Fred Thompson's deadline

Fred Thompson could use Windows without it crashing, but he prefers to communicate with the computer directly, in binary.

Fred Thompson can get blood from a stone. But it's usually a stone he has bashed a few commie or hippy skulls with.

Posted: 5/2/2007 2:37:03 PM EDT

[#8]

If you play Led Zeppelin's "Stairway to Heaven" backwards, you will hear Fred Thompson loading his shotgun.

In an election, it costs ten dollars to vote for Fred Thompson since voting for him is a privilege, not a right.

Not only does Fred Thompson cut taxes, he cuts tax collectors.

Posted: 5/2/2007 3:25:02 PM EDT

[#9]

Fred Thompson sleeps with a nightlight..................because the dark is afraid of Fred Thompson.

Posted: 5/2/2007 3:33:04 PM EDT

[#10]

He does have the look of a President and a cool voice.

I am looking forward to hearing more about his platform. I hope it works out for the Republican platform. Maybe he really will be like Chuck and smack the pussy Republicans around for not standing up for what is right.

God help us as a nation if that C**T HITLERY would get a shot at the white house. VERY SCARY!

Posted: 5/2/2007 3:38:05 PM EDT

[#11]

Posted: 5/2/2007 3:53:51 PM EDT

[#12]

Quoted:

Okay then.

I don't watch the televised news much. I just saw a Republican candidate run-down on MSNBC today and he was not on there.

I don't know which of the below amazes me more.

1. There's anyone still watching MSNBC.

2. That anyone who regularly posts here would watch MSNBC.

3. That anyone would go to the bastion of liberalism in broadcasting to get a rundown of conservative Republican cadidates.

Posted: 5/2/2007 6:15:49 PM EDT

[#13]

My mom and I were cracking up at dinner! She is having her cat speyed and is freaking out worrying over how to get the cat in the carrier to go to the vet. I said, "You could just get Fred Thompson to come by and tell her 'Get your ass in that box.'"

Posted: 5/3/2007 8:59:48 AM EDT

[#14]

Also from IMAO - this guy is getting to be one of my daily reads....

Advice for participants in the Republican Debate:

* If asked whether you're worried about Fred Thompson joining the race, try not to urinate uncontrollably while answering the question.

* Great line for whoever uses it first: "If Harry Reid keeps it up, he's going to need a withdrawal date for my foot from his ass!"

* If asked whether the war in Iraq can be won, the best answer for that is, "Only a homo would ask that question." Actually, that's great response for a lot of questions.

* Republicans want a man of action, so don't be afraid to break things in controlled fits of rage.

Posted: 5/3/2007 9:08:56 AM EDT

[#15]

I was at a Chicago Cubs baseball game once. It was pouring down rain so they called a "rain delay", well I be damned if the field crew didnt start rolling out the plastic to protect the field when no other than Fred Thompson stops them and proceeds to cover the infield with his Foreskin.

helluva Man !

Posted: 5/3/2007 9:09:06 AM EDT

[#16]

Quoted:
Sorry if I'm out of it but it doesn't seem like he's even a blip on the media's radar, is he actually going to run or what? They are talking about obscure guys I don't know much about but no mention of the more famous Thompson.

simple answer.

Liberals are scared of Fred Thompson

Fred Thompson is Conservative

Media is mostly Liberal

Wait young Jedi... The second he announces... it is going to get huge fast.

Said it before and I will say it again... I predicted ALL presidential elections since Jimmy Carter... If Fred Runs... I am calling it now.. HE WILL WIN!

(unless he loses)

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