[size=6]HUMAN RESOURCES SUCKS.[/size=6]

Okay, I need to vent.  I graduated from college last May with a degree in business.  I've been looking for a job since.

Interview?  Okay.  Interviews?  Umm, okay.  FOUR INTERVIEWS?!  My god, didn't you learn anything about me in the last three?!

Psychological exam?  HUH?  I've been given written "honesty tests" involving what I'd do in different situatons.  "How many times do you use marijauna before going to work?"  [i]Come on[/i].  Even if I did use marijauna (and I don't), do you truly expect me to fill in the bubble for anything [b]but[/b] the answer "I don't use marijauna."?

Take a DIVERSITY TEST?  I guess.  "African-Americans are lazy."  Do you truly expect me to answer anything [b]but[/b] false??!

And, these aren't just ten questions tests.  The diversity one took me half-an-hour.

The guy interviewing me leaves the office "to get the phone" and drops his wallet on the way out?  Gimme a break!  HOW DUMB DO I LOOK??!  

Oh, and the questions I'm asked...  These are some real prizewinners.  Nothing about my qualifications, nothing about my ability to do the job, and nothing about if I will show up on time daily.  Here, get these.....

1.  If you could be ANY animal, what type of animal would you be?  -  (You know, I'm not applying to be a children's aide or work at a zoo.  I'm applying to be an assistant manager of a distribution center.)

2.  Thank you, ____, for coming.  Please have a seat and make yourself comfortable.  Okay, let's start off with telling me about a few of your worst workplace faults and errors.  -  (Gee, this REALLY makes me feel comfortable.)

3.  I notice that you have a fair amount of computer skills on your resume.  Please take this computer test.  -  (Okay, but the test won't allow for shortcuts.  I can make IF/THEN and formulas in Excel with the help of the wizard.  But, I don't know the formulae by heart!!!!!  Plus, one time I clicked just to the left of "OK" in the word mockup.  Oops.  To the computer, I now don't know how to save a word document and my score is lowered.)

I leave the interview and immedately an employee follows me around the store.  When he catches up withg me, he immedately asks if I need help and quickly asks my opinion about the weather.  After discussing the weather and how nice it'd be to play golf, he thanks me and returns to his post.  I look down at something on the shelf and look back up again.  HE'S RUNNING TO THE BACK AREA WHERE I HAD THE INTERVIEW AND BEGINS WRITING STUFF DOWN ABOUT OUR CONVERSATION!

Every little thing in my background nit-picked. Fair enough; please feel free to contact my previous employers (all) and to check my criminal record (none).  But, why do you need to run a CREDIT CHECK?  In truth, I have no blotches.  But, what does this have to do with a sales job?  (I'm selling stuff, not buying it!)  I'M APPLYING FOR A COMMISSIONED SALES JOB AT AN ELECTRONICS STORE, NOT THE CIA!

I go to one place in a suit and tie and am told that I'm too formally dressed and may not be a good fit in the corporate culture.  I go to another place in dockers and a button-down shirt and am told that I'm under-dressed.  

Finally, I get an offer.  I could be making more as a SECURITY GUARD!

If there are any HR people out there, please realize the following.

There are legions of qualified people out there.  Most of us only want to do an honest day's work for an honest day's pay.  We don't want to play games.  We want to come to work on time and to accomplish what our supervisors tell us to accomplish.

-I have no clue what type of animal I desire to be.  

-I'll be honest with you if you're honest with me.

-I'm willing to do what my boss tells me.  This includes coming to work daily and on time.

Please, spare the honesty, diversity, etc. tests.  I can't imagine anyone admitting that they believe that blacks are inferior or that they believe that you have the right to steal from your employer.  If necessary, give me a skills test that gives an accurate representation of my skills that are needed for the position.

In turn, I'll do what you tell me, complete my work, show up daily and on time, and not cause trouble.

AR15.Com'ers, does this sound fair?  Or, am I way off?

Welcome to the Brave New World...my sympathies.  What state?  This all sounds like one of the people's republics.....

I agree completely with your sentiments, but it sounds to me like that would be the last place in the world I would want to work.  I'm not sure I'd go back for a third interview, let alone a fourth.  If that's how they run their interviews, I would assume that's a fairly accurate reflection of how they run their business and treat their employees, and I wouldn't touch the job with a ten-foot pole.

I'm not an HR person, but I am a person who conducts interviews I'll give my opinion.

I don't ask the "If you were a color what color would you be?" questions, but we do give the psyche test (mandated).

I think you would be surprised on what people put on those things. There ARE people out there who say yes to the "Are African-Americans lazy?" type questions. Best to weed them out early.

Some companies overdue it a bit, I agree, but there are some strange people out there.  

And I'll add that very rarly give more than 1 interview.

3 or 4 interviews is insane. It's a waste of your, and my, time.

I wouldn't take that job. I once interviewed at a place that had a similar test. 'Would you ever break the law Yes /No'. Yes I would if it was unjust, but there's only a check box for yes or no. Same thing on and on.

Funny thing is that the owner of the very same company (who did the interview and gave me the test) was later sent to jail for fraud and forgery. He probably didn't take the test.

You don't need that job, prebans.

I refuse to work for any company that puts me through that kind of BS.  I also refuse to work for any company that requires piss tests, hair samples, etc.  Not that I have anything to hide in my hair or urine, but it's NONE OF THEIR DAMN BUSINESS.

We now return control of this thread to prebans.

Good rant.

That's just nuts. Forget them. I just took HR Management 101 this year, and there was no mention of this sort of wacky behaviour. I'm all for reasonable questioning, once or twice, but most of what you consider to be nonsense, is. I'll bet that this sort of mindless feel good boondoggling is perpetuated throught the company, so why bother..

BTW, go with the security guard job. I hear that the ones who work at malls have excellent perks...[:D]

Juggernaut

Jeeeeeeeeez!  Sounds like a place I wouldn't want to work.  Send in the politically correct clones!

What kind of animal???  An intestinal worm - that way I could more easily digest this shit.

Edited to add - "Good Luck finding the perfect job! (really)"

It was a test to see how much BS you could stand. I'd say you hit your limit. [%|]

Stealth, your killin' me.

Prebans, Run! It gets worst once they hire you.

holly s--! is that what it's like out there now?
i've nearly always worked for small privately owned companies. my ONE corporate experience was enough for me. i pray i never have to look for another job in that atmosphere. i'd rather pick up aluminum cans.

Thank you for the support.  However, I need to be fair- not ALL of these were done by the same company.  This is a litany of complaints I've had since I started searching about two months ago.

If all of these came from one job, I'd have run out pretty d*mn quickly.

The drug tests are pretty much across the board.  No matter where I've gone, drug testing is always required.  No test means no job and no paycheck.

State?  Believe it or not, this isn't Kalifornia, New York, etc.  Right now, I'm not posting the state because I'm too paranoid about having them look around online.  (One of the other places I applied called later and asked about if I used the internet much.  Probably nothing, but I'm paranoid.  I mean, doing a search online by name, email address, etc. isn't all that hard.)

Corporate just sucks.  I might make less at a small firm, but I look at the less money as payment for not having to deal with horsesh*t daily.

Hmm.  Well, back to the job search.  But, if any of you need a Cum Laude business graduate who just wants to exchange a fair day's work for a fair day's pay [b]and[/b] who'll discuss firearms/shoot with you, let me know.

Hell, I'll even clean out your AR-15 three times for free.  [:D]

What the hell kind of store is this?  Do they sell top secret gadgets to foreign powers or something?  

GO TO THEM AND SAY THAT YOU DON'T WANT THE JOB.  TELL THEM THAT THEIR HIRING PRACTICE *******FUCKING******** SUCKS AND THAT YOU DON'T LIKE BEING HASSLED BY A BUNCH OF ELECTRONICS STORE CLERKS WHO HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO.

And let us all know what store it is, so we know not to buy from Nazis.