Posted: 1/25/2005 10:54:30 AM EDT
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Subject: Retirement > >The Army found they had too many officers and decided to offer an >early retirement bonus. >They promised any officer who volunteered for retirement a bonus of >$1,000 for every inch measured in a straight line between any two points in >his body. The officer got to choose what those two points would be. > > >The first officer who accepted, asked that he be measured from the top >of his head to the tip of his toes. He was measured at six feet and walked >out with a bonus of $72,000. > >The second officer who accepted was a little smarter and asked to be >measured from the tip of his outstretched hands to his toes. He walked >out with $96,000. > > >The third one was a non officer grizzly old 1st Sargent , when asked >where he would like to be measured replied, "from the tip of my weenie >to my testicles." > >It was suggested by the pension man that he might want to reconsider, >explaining about the nice big checks the previous two officers had >received. But the old 1st Sarge insisted and they decided to go along with him, >providing the measurement was taken by a medical officer. > >The medical officer arrived and instructed the Sargent to "drop 'em," >which he did. The medical officer placed the tape measure on the tip of A >the sarges weenie and began to work back. >My God!" he suddenly exclaimed, "Where are your testicles?" >The old sarge calmly replied . . "Vietnam |