Posted: 7/9/2004 7:34:29 PM EDT
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Cheating or no? |
| If you are in a relationship and have sex with anyone else, it is cheating. It does not matter whether it is an affair or a one night stand. The duration of the affair has nothing to do with defining cheating. Where did you get the idea that the difference between an affair and a one night stand is how it is begun? I'd say a lot of affairs began as the person thinking they'd only have a one night stand and things just continued. So if you had a one night stand, you cheated! |
It may be different emotionally but that's it. If you are married, then you committed adultery. Doesn't matter how many times you had sex with someone else. The best rule is not to do something you will be sorry for later. Think ahead! |
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Once again, to clear things up--this isn't me. I read a Newsweek at the airport yesterday. Here's a new spin on the topic for you guys... Would you leave your spouse if they cheated on you, or do you believe that marriage is a promise to each other to work out ALL things? Your thoughts... |
I DIDN'T ASK if it was wrong or not damnit! I understand it is wrong.  I ASKED if it is considered cheating. I'm not sure what my own personal definition of cheating is I guess. Affairs are cheating, no doubt. Unplanned one-nighters, I'm not sure. |
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My way of thinking: If you have a current girlfriend (or boyfriend) or are married, or are married but going through a divorce but the divorce is not final, and you sleep with/make out/one night stand/etc. it is cheating. Period. No grey area. No "what if alcohol is involved?" No "what if it's out of state?" Nothing. Grounds for divorce/breaking up in my book, and before you guys jump on my ass about it, YES I DO hold myself to the same standard that I expect. |
BZZZZZ Wrong! Cheating is cheating....this only differance is one you planned on doing. It's like the differance between 1st degree murder and manslaughter. The intentions and goals are differant but either way someone is dead. Sgatr15 |
She did and I did (leave her - actually she did the leaving it was my house in my name). It turned into more than a one night stand though. How can you ever truely trust them again. I spent about 4 months thinking I wanted to work it out but she wanted to have fun. I'm actually happier now than I was then. I have 50/50 physical and legal custody of my son and I see him more now than I did before and i have a new girlfriend. There's always light at the end of the tunnel. 
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Absolutely I would divorce her. She can go regret it with whoever she bumped uglies with. As to you, I hope you are not married if you have to ponder such things. You are obviously not mature enough for marriage. Sorry, but I'm just telling you the truth--sometimes it's ugly. 
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Whatever. Thanks for the blind assumption that it was a personal topic, which it was not. I'm happying married, and have been so for years. This topic was something I thinking about after reading a newsweek article on infedelity. I hardly think that talking about it makes me immature in my marriage... Man, a lot of guys willing to give it all up if your wife cheated on you...your choice, but not me. I wonder if your wife feels the same way about you if you made a mistake? I love my wife. And loving means forgiveness. If it happened to me, I'd have to know 100% she was truly sorry--if she was, it can be worked out. If she wasn't sorry--well yeah, I'd leave her too. To each his own, but I find it interesting that so many of you would give up no matter what. No offense, but that's not marriage if you ask me. |
So it is okay to cheat on someone as long as you are sorry afterwards?  I think what most of the posters are saying is that the relationship would be over because they could no longer trust the person. If a person can be tempted to give into lust once who is is say they will not do it again. But as long as they are sorry I guess it is okay. |
Too many variables for me to give a yes or no answer to that. Cheating once, and that means a one nighter an on going affair by definition means that they cheated more than once, forgiveness might be found but if it ever happened again then it's the boot for sure. |
The first time my ex cheated I found out and she was sorry. We decided to work things out for the kids. Well then a couple of years later she thought she had found Mr. Right. Well, she packed up and left me and the kids. It definitely wasn't easy at first. Turned out Mr. Right was Mr. Wrong and she wanted to come back. She is still out looking for Mr. Right and the kids and I are just fine without her. |
Well if it were cheating would you consider THAT WRONG? It's really the same question is'nt it? Any extra-marital sex is cheating. It's a NO BRAINER!!! When someone does that to another person, they have showed a total lack of respect for the person they are with. Not to mention that it can KILL THEM, if they contracted HIV or such. DW |