Posted: 10/8/2014 4:48:14 PM EDT
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Got the call again today. I was home for lunch so I thought, sure, I got time.
These guys call once a month. Caller (in thick Indian accent, we’ll call him Apu) GB: Hello? Apu: Hello, this is Steve with Microsoft Security. Are you on your computer? GB: Well yes, yes I am Apu: We have information there is a security problem with your computer and would like to help fix it GB: ok, what do I do? Apu: Do you see a control key at the lower left part of your keyboard? It should be labeled Ctrl. GB: I do! Apu: What do you see next to that key? GB: a strange button with square boxes… Apu: is it a Microsoft Windows button? GB: I’m not sure, it’s on my laptop and I don’t have a windows keyboard 
Apu: OK, hold down the Control key and the Windows key. And while holding down these keys press the letter R key…do you see the letter R key? GB: I do!!! I say excitedly! Apu: What do you see on your screen? GB: A picture of you fucking a goat! A moment of silence since our relationship just changed…. Apu: Fuck you. I fucked your mother last night…I broke into your house and fucked your mother good. GB: Apu, you can’t fuck my mother when one, she doesn’t live here and two, you are fucking a goat. My mother would never stand for that. Apu: Fuck you, click |
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Quoted:
Got the call again today. I was home for lunch so I thought, sure, I got time. These guys call once a month. Caller (in thick Indian accent, we’ll call him Apu) GB: Hello? Apu: Hello, this is Steve with Microsoft Security. Are you on your computer? GB: Well yes, yes I am Apu: We have information there is a security problem with your computer and would like to help fix it GB: ok, what do I do? Apu: Do you see a control key at the lower left part of your keyboard? It should be labeled Ctrl. GB: I do! Apu: What do you see next to that key? GB: a strange button with square boxes… Apu: is it a Microsoft Windows button? GB: I’m not sure, it’s on my laptop and I don’t have a windows keyboard
Apu: OK, hold down the Control key and the Windows key. And while holding down these keys press the letter R key…do you see the letter R key? GB: I do!!! I say excitedly! Apu: What do you see on your screen? GB: A picture of you fucking a goat! A moment of silence since our relationship just changed…. Apu: Fuck you. I fucked your mother last night…I broke into your house and fucked your mother good. GB: Apu, you can’t fuck my mother when one, she doesn’t live here and two, you are fucking a goat. My mother would never stand for that. Apu: Fuck you, click  I wish I had a quick wit to pull stuff like this! I would just get mad and hang up.
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