Posted: 9/26/2014 7:43:05 PM EDT
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Today is my Dad's birthday. I haven't celebrated it with him in a few years, since I joined the Army.
Even when we were separated by distance, my siblings and I would compete to see who could wish him a happy birthday first (this resulted in many midnight phone calls and- as technology marched along- text messages). My Dad passed away in February of this year, and my sister posted a status on FB at exactly midnight, in lieu of a text to a long-cancelled cell. She won, FYI. 
I've been listening to a recorded voicemail he left me, from the night he went into the hospital. Its the last time I ever heard his voice. I'm not sure why I am even posting about it. I also made a thread when he died, for those of you that may remember. I guess its easy to talk to anonymous people about issues that I have a hard time bringing up to those that are close to me. I've talked to the wife about it, and let her listen to the message. She was never able to meet him face to face due to geographical constraints, but she is very understanding and supportive. I am a lucky guy. Anyway GD, don't feel bad for me (like I have to tell you guys not to  ).
I'm just not ready to let him go. I don't believe I ever will be. 
He loved hunting, fishing, John Wayne movies, and The Eagles. He wasn't anything special to most people, although he always had friends around. He worked blue collar jobs his entire life, until he was told he couldn't work anymore. That broke his heart. He was and is my hero, and I wanted to grow up to be just like him. |
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Hang in there sir. I lost my Dad 21 years ago last 4th of July. I still miss him terribly. Make sure you record that message on some other form of media so it won't be lost. His birthday reminded me to upload it to my Google Drive. Thank you. It's funny, as time goes on I remember more and more stuff I had forgotten. Sometimes it takes me by surprise. |
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I understand, Dad passed away this year and his birthday is coming up in november, always spent the month or two prior to it "pestering" him about what he wanted as he always said nothing. Would finally weasel out something he wanted but wouldn't buy for himself. We had fun going back and forth doing it and I really miss the bantering back and forth. [last year was a good battery tender for the car he stored in the winter]
Like the OP, I consider myself blessed to have had such a great Dad. While he may be gone form this mortal realm, the memories remain. |
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My dad passed 3 years ago in a nursing home on a sunny Sunday afternoon. I went to see him that day and he said he wanted to go out for a ride so I loaded him in the car and we went off for a couple hours. He kept dozing off very tired, but kept telling me he's ok. Got him back to the home and he was really tired and wanted to get in bed. As soon as he hit the pillow he was asleep. They called me when I got home. It's tough for a while, especially certain anniversary days of good or bad, but life goes on and time heals to a point. Ya gotta remember all the good times. That's how I keep goin.
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I can kind of relate. My wife and I weren't together when she died, we were in different states (for business reasons). I also had a message from her on my cell phone she left for me. Likewise, it was the last time I heard her voice, getting the message after I found out she had died.
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Remembering the good times is the plan, clinteastwood!  Thank you for sharing your memories of your father.
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I can kind of relate. My wife and I weren't together when she died, we were in different states (for business reasons). I also had a message from her on my cell phone she left before she died. Likewise, it was the last time I heard her voice, getting the message after I found out she had died. I can't even begin to imagine...  . I'm so sorry.
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Hang in there sir. I lost my Dad 21 years ago last 4th of July. I still miss him terribly. Make sure you record that message on some other form of media so it won't be lost. July 4th for mine too, only 8 years ago. Was it planned to coincide with Adams & Jefferson? My dad admired them and Mom counted down...he waited for that and us to all see him to say goodbye. Still hurts...one of the worst. OP, don't worry about talking about someone you admire and miss. People who experienced the same will get it. Who cares about the others. ETA: Dad's birthday is next week. |
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Why would you want to "let go?"
Keep him in your heart forever. Occasionally when I am driving in my car alone I will talk to my deceased loved ones. You know, say things I never found time to say when they were alive but wanted to. It's kind of therapeutic sometimes. |
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Your Dad lives on in You and your siblings. Sounds like he did a great job in raising you guys.
Sounds like a guy I would have enjoyed bullshitting with and working alongside and grabbing a beer with! I'm sorry for your loss and prayers and thoughts inbound for you all
ETA: Those that lost their Dad's on the 4th....well that's my Dad's bday. I have been going through the hardest times of my life and I haven't talked to him since January. I have called and left messages and when no reply....I'm at a loss as what to do. He and I argued one night when I was asking advice and t went south. I have eaten crow and apologized but I wasn't the one arguing and throwing stones in that argument. It kinda hit home reading your replies. |
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I understand......lost mine two months before I ETS'd back in 90.........it gets easier but always sucks Damn. He had his big heart attack while I was deployed, right smack in the middle. I found out from my sister a couple of days later. Fucking sucked, but it also made me realize I was lucky to get the time I had with him when I came back. |
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Why would you want to "let go?" Keep him in your heart forever. Occasionally when I am driving in my car alone I will talk to my deceased loved ones. You know, say things I never found time to say when they were alive but wanted to. I meant "let go" as in, accept that I won't see him or be able to call him. Not the best choice of words, but its an abstract concept that I am having trouble to describe. You know what I mean?
I know he is always in my heart and on my mind. |
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Damn. He had his big heart attack while I was deployed, right smack in the middle. I found out from my sister a couple of days later. Fucking sucked, but it also made me realize I was lucky to get the time I had with him when I came back. Quoted:
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I understand......lost mine two months before I ETS'd back in 90.........it gets easier but always sucks Damn. He had his big heart attack while I was deployed, right smack in the middle. I found out from my sister a couple of days later. Fucking sucked, but it also made me realize I was lucky to get the time I had with him when I came back. More coincidence. My grandfather passed away when I was deployed (Desert Storm). I found out from my sister three days later. |
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Quoted:
I meant "let go" as in, accept that I won't see him or be able to call him. Not the best choice of words, but its an abstract concept that I am having trouble to describe. You know what I mean?
I know he is always in my heart and on my mind. Quoted:
Quoted:
Why would you want to "let go?" Keep him in your heart forever. Occasionally when I am driving in my car alone I will talk to my deceased loved ones. You know, say things I never found time to say when they were alive but wanted to. I meant "let go" as in, accept that I won't see him or be able to call him. Not the best choice of words, but its an abstract concept that I am having trouble to describe. You know what I mean?
I know he is always in my heart and on my mind. That is hard. Its been since February for me, too, since losing my Mom. Its very easy to still think youre going to see them again, and then reality slaps you in the face. Sorry for your loss, OP. Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile |
| I know the feeling OP. Grief really hit me 8 months later when my daughter was born. I called the house number to tell him he had a grandaughter and got this line has been disconnected. I broke down right there in that spare hospital room. One of the happiest yet saddest days of my life. |
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Quoted: I can kind of relate. My wife and I weren't together when she died, we were in different states (for business reasons). I also had a message from her on my cell phone she left for me. Likewise, it was the last time I heard her voice, getting the message after I found out she had died. Sorry Bro. Really rough, losing your wife. |
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Dad passed several years ago. And I know the feeling.
Dad was a rock, nothing could hurt him. He taught me to make my own way, sis too. I miss him, a lot. I hope it was quick and you didn't have to try and help him as he lost his mind. Gotta break this train of thought. Some of what he raised me on: 
(prayers out, try to remember him whole and hale.) |
So sorry for your loss OP. I'm sure he's with you in spirit.
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I can sympathize. I lost my Dad on September 21, 2003, and this time of year makes me think of him. Not so much because he passed away in September, but because harvest was his favorite time of year (I come from a long line of farmers), and running a combine was his favorite thing. But then again, there's always something that reminds me of my Dad, year round. And I can't say that you'll get over it, because if you were anywhere near as close to my Dad as I was to mine, you never will. It just doesn't hurt as much as time goes on, but you'll always miss your Dad. Hang in there. |
