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AR15.COM
12/22/2002 8:27:23 AM EDT
Okay, here's what happened.  It's a beautiful sunny Sunday morning here in California.  I decided to go for my normal morning walk.  Along the way I decide to buy the family some donuts...hell, it's Christmas right??

Anyways, I start walking home and decide to eat a Carmel Bar on the way home.  Two Sacramento City Police drive by and stop at the corner in front of me.  As I approach the corner both LEOs step out of their cars and confront me!

 They ask me where I am going and for my ID.  While one officer is running my DL number the other asks me if I have been drinking or doing any drugs!!  WTF???  I answer "no".  The officer then asks why do I have a "glazed" look on my face.  At this point I am getting pretty pissed and start to walk away.

That's when the officer grabs me and the box of dozen donuts drops to the ground.  The box opens and I here the first LEO say: "Well, what do we have here...."

Next thing I know they are inspecting the donuts and telling me I am in violation of the new Sacramento City "Glaze" ordinance!!

WTF????

The first LEO picked up my apple fritter and claimed there was "extra" dough which allowed "the attachment of auxilary donut hole glaze power"!!!

Long story short, the damn LEOs took my freaking donuts claiming they needed them for "evidence".  I am so freaking pissed right now!!  Now I have to have fruit for breakfast!!!

Sgtar15
12/22/2002 8:36:06 AM EDT
[#1]


Take 'em to court. Use the "TWINKEE" defence... fullclip

12/22/2002 8:38:43 AM EDT
[#2]
At least you weren't speeding down the sidewalk in your wheelchair, wearing MARPAT camo with a union shop hat on. Then you would have really been screwed.
12/22/2002 9:08:48 AM EDT
[#3]
They probably just stopped giving out free samples with coffee to the men in blue at the local donut shop.  You were caught with the goods(ies).
12/22/2002 9:10:53 AM EDT
[#4]
You didn't know? Glazed donuts is a control substance used only by COPs. It helps elevate the crap levels in their brains...look at their eyes, they are brown!
You as a civilian CANNOT have your brain full of crap. Next time watch out.
12/22/2002 9:28:44 AM EDT
[#5]
God thing they weren't Krispy Kremes or it would have been a full SWAT call out not just patrol officers.
12/22/2002 9:33:28 AM EDT
[#6]
You're got off easy, I would have took your donuts [b]AND[/b] issued you a summons.[BD]
12/22/2002 9:39:32 AM EDT
[#7]
your kidding right? cops shaking down people for donuts..
12/22/2002 9:44:56 AM EDT
[#8]
Out of curiosity.......Why did you give them your DL?  Someone correct me if I am wrong but you don't even have to verbally identify yourself.

Obviously not giving them the info they want will probably piss them off or provoke them to find something but giving them info may have the same effect.

12/22/2002 9:59:50 AM EDT
[#9]
walking down the street with what is obviously a box of donuts in broad daylight..
I hate to say it...but y'all be axin' fo it...
:)
12/22/2002 10:06:25 AM EDT
[#10]
The patriot act, in conjunction with executive orders issued by Presidents Bush and Clinton, who are in a conspiracy together, allow this sort of thing to happen. you can read about it at [url]www.asswebparanoiddelusions.com[/url]
12/22/2002 10:09:47 AM EDT
[#11]
Quoted:


Take 'em to court. Use the "TWINKEE" defence... fullclip

View Quote


Never use the twinkee defense with out OJ.
12/22/2002 10:11:39 AM EDT
[#12]
Its not like you were walking down the street with a combat assault shotgun slung over your shoulder - you were carrying DONUTS!!!

Man!  You gotta be more careful.

Personally, I've gotten my CCD (Carry of Concealed Donut) issued from the state, so I don't worry much.  If I were you, I'd seriously look into getting a CCD.

And why, may I ask, were you not in possession of your passport?

Some guys are just asking for trouble.
12/22/2002 10:14:01 AM EDT
[#13]
?
12/22/2002 10:19:14 AM EDT
[#14]
Cop to motorist:  "Sir, your breath smells a little odd.  Have you been drinking"

Motorist to cop"  "No, sir. I don't drink.   And officer, your eyes look a little glazed.  Have you been eating donuts?"

CJ

12/22/2002 10:24:43 AM EDT
[#15]
AWOB!
12/22/2002 10:29:26 AM EDT
[#16]
Pardon my ignorance...

What does AWOB mean?

CJ
12/22/2002 10:33:09 AM EDT
[#17]


Really, you should count your lucky stars you were not near a mall. When the ninjas caught you they would take your sweets, kick your ass and leave you with crap in your shorts. May even cut your head off.... fullclip

12/22/2002 10:33:30 AM EDT
[#18]
Kalifonication has a law that requires all subjects and visitors from Free America to submit to identity verification.
He is lucky they didn't hold him down for a stool sample...


Quoted:
Out of curiosity.......Why did you give them your DL?  Someone correct me if I am wrong but you don't even have to verbally identify yourself.
View Quote
12/22/2002 11:01:59 AM EDT
[#19]
Quoted:
your kidding right? cops shaking down people for donuts..
View Quote


One LEO actually grabbed my apple fritter and asked what it was.  When I told him it was an apple fritter he claimed that sounded French and it may be a illegally imported donut!

I go to court in January[:(]

Sgtar15
12/22/2002 11:02:38 AM EDT
[#20]
Now look, you really have nothing to gripe about you were clearly and knowingly acting in a suspicious manner.  Obviously you know this or you would be griping about the stop itself and not the loss of pastry.  Noone, but noone walks in California.  The states motto is if you can't fly drive, and if you can't drive there, don't go.
12/22/2002 11:07:51 AM EDT
[#21]
Quoted:
Out of curiosity.......Why did you give them your DL?  Someone correct me if I am wrong but you don't even have to verbally identify yourself.
View Quote


Depends on why you were stopped. If its a consensual encounter you dont have to say a word and are free to walk away. But if its a ped stop for some violation of law; Jaywalking/Cross against a steady red dont walk signal/Pedestrian in Bike lane/Drunk in public/Tresspassing....Then you gotta ID yourself.
12/22/2002 11:11:26 AM EDT
[#22]
Guess you forgot to register them glazed donuts.
12/22/2002 11:14:51 AM EDT
[#23]
You should've thanked the kind officers for taking your donuts.  They're really not good for your health you know.
12/22/2002 11:20:31 AM EDT
[#24]
The trick is they take your ID first, so you'll be too afraid to report them.  No one deserves to be victimized, but you should use more common sense.

This is like saying "I am so surprised I was attaked by sharks.  I was just swimming along with a few armloads of decomposing bloody fish and then out of the blue came these obnoxious predators"
12/22/2002 11:24:12 AM EDT
[#25]
Quoted:
Quoted:
Out of curiosity.......Why did you give them your DL?  Someone correct me if I am wrong but you don't even have to verbally identify yourself.
View Quote


Depends on why you were stopped. If its a consensual encounter you dont have to say a word and are free to walk away. But if its a ped stop for some violation of law; Jaywalking/Cross against a steady red dont walk signal/Pedestrian in Bike lane/Drunk in public/Tresspassing....Then you gotta ID yourself.
View Quote



Clarification on my original comment:  Someone correct me if I am wrong but you don't even have to verbally identify yourself unless you are being charged with something.

If they attempt to pat you down because they feel you have a dangerous item even though they are not charging you with anything you can inform them that "you do not consent to a search" and allow them to execute the search. If they didn't have probable cause and/or didn't charge you, you do have recourse.

I haven't read the whole "Patriot Act" but that probably throws all of our rights in the trash anyway. They will probably want to get a print of my zero.
12/22/2002 11:44:08 AM EDT
[#26]
Report the doughnuts stolen.  Go to the police station and describe the perpetrators.
12/22/2002 11:49:46 AM EDT
[#27]
Your are really lucky this happened now and not after the implementation of the ballistic dough  fingerprint test.  They will never be able to trace those donuts back to you.  (You did recover your ID didn't you?)
12/22/2002 12:05:32 PM EDT
[#28]
It is a violation of policy to consume donuts while in uniform around here...bagels and cappucinos are okay, though.
12/22/2002 12:10:08 PM EDT
[#29]
The "glazed" look must be in your [b]eyes[/b].  Obviously you have been molested on improper grounds, a "glazed" face.  Be sure and sue the donut manufacturer for too much glaze while you're at it.  The law to sue under would be the UCL.  Any shitty lawyer will take the case.
12/22/2002 12:20:25 PM EDT
[#30]
If they were baked fresh this morning, they would not qualify for Pre-Ban Status. A bearclaw in the bunch would be considered an un-registered assualt doughnut. Looks like you were lucky to get off with mere confication. The alternative could have been a heavy fine and mandatory jail term. You could also loose your right to ever have another doughnut. Don't screw around with this. Next time have them delivered and be sure to fill out the proper transfer forms.

Just think what might have happened if you had any Class III doughnuts. [:D]
12/22/2002 12:46:09 PM EDT
[#31]
"Excuse me officer, name, I haven't been drinking and don't do drugs." "Would you like a donut?".

Let em know you noticed their name never hurts. It then limits them to letting you go or dropping you in the river.

Donuts, Kaliforniastan what do you expect.
12/22/2002 12:48:49 PM EDT
[#32]
Maybe cops mistook you for a street walker.  Were you walking in Hollywood area?
[BD]
12/22/2002 12:54:05 PM EDT
[#33]
Is this one of the perps?

[img]http://www.funnysnaps.com/photodonut.jpg[/img]
12/22/2002 1:09:58 PM EDT
[#34]
Help me out with this one guys.  Is jelly filling considered a propellant or explosive?  Do donut holes require a Short Doughed Pastry Stamp?  What about sprinkles and icing? Do these things fulfill the legal definition of "Evil Features found on Assault Pastries"?  All these rules and regulations from the [b]B[/b]ureau of [b]A[/b]pple [b]T[/b]oasted [b]F[/b]ritters are confusing the hell out of me! [>:/]


[:D]

EDITED FOR TYPOGRAPHICAL ERRORS
12/22/2002 1:30:45 PM EDT
[#35]
Call 911.  They've been located.

[img]http://www.mikeyshouse.com/images/donutland3.jpg[/img]
12/22/2002 5:43:47 PM EDT
[#36]
rkbar15, THAT"S THEM!!  Those are the guys!!
Yes I got my IG back, but the picture was smudged with some wierd creamy subsance[>:/].......

Sgtar15
12/22/2002 6:21:45 PM EDT
[#37]
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Out of curiosity.......Why did you give them your DL?  Someone correct me if I am wrong but you don't even have to verbally identify yourself.
View Quote


Depends on why you were stopped. If its a consensual encounter you dont have to say a word and are free to walk away. But if its a ped stop for some violation of law; Jaywalking/Cross against a steady red dont walk signal/Pedestrian in Bike lane/Drunk in public/Tresspassing....Then you gotta ID yourself.
View Quote



Clarification on my original comment:  Someone correct me if I am wrong but you don't even have to verbally identify yourself unless you are being charged with something.

If they attempt to pat you down because they feel you have a dangerous item even though they are not charging you with anything you can inform them that "you do not consent to a search" and allow them to execute the search. If they didn't have probable cause and/or didn't charge you, you do have recourse.

I haven't read the whole "Patriot Act" but that probably throws all of our rights in the trash anyway. They will probably want to get a print of my zero.
View Quote


Terry v Ohio.

The police can stop you if they have areasonable articulable suspicion, that you have just commited, are committing, or about to commit a crime.

You ain't free to go and you ain't under arrest. If the questioning doesn't dissipate their suspicions, yes you can be required to give your name.

If the have R-A-S, that you have, will, or are commiting a crime, and have a R-A-S that you are armed, you can be frisked.

The Constitution protects you against UNREASONABLE searches. Not ALL searches.
12/22/2002 9:31:15 PM EDT
[#38]
What's the matter, all the cats in the neighborhood on vacation?  [:)]
12/23/2002 9:52:57 AM EDT
[#39]
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Out of curiosity.......Why did you give them your DL?  Someone correct me if I am wrong but you don't even have to verbally identify yourself.
View Quote


Depends on why you were stopped. If its a consensual encounter you dont have to say a word and are free to walk away. But if its a ped stop for some violation of law; Jaywalking/Cross against a steady red dont walk signal/Pedestrian in Bike lane/Drunk in public/Tresspassing....Then you gotta ID yourself.
View Quote



Clarification on my original comment:  Someone correct me if I am wrong but you don't even have to verbally identify yourself unless you are being charged with something.

If they attempt to pat you down because they feel you have a dangerous item even though they are not charging you with anything you can inform them that "you do not consent to a search" and allow them to execute the search. If they didn't have probable cause and/or didn't charge you, you do have recourse.

I haven't read the whole "Patriot Act" but that probably throws all of our rights in the trash anyway. They will probably want to get a print of my zero.
View Quote


Terry v Ohio.

The police can stop you if they have areasonable articulable suspicion, that you have just commited, are committing, or about to commit a crime.

You ain't free to go and you ain't under arrest. If the questioning doesn't dissipate their suspicions, yes you can be required to give your name.

If the have R-A-S, that you have, will, or are commiting a crime, and have a R-A-S that you are armed, you can be frisked.

The Constitution protects you against UNREASONABLE searches. Not ALL searches.
View Quote



Hmmmm.  Any law against pissing your pants while they frisk you?
12/23/2002 10:16:28 AM EDT
[#40]
I have to ask you one thing, did you have any evil "banned" feature's on them like high compacity jelly you know more than 10oz of jelly. did you have any evil powder coating on them. did you have a folding fritter. you know those pistol grip beagels are a big no! no!
12/23/2002 10:37:18 AM EDT
[#41]
Like I said, they took the Apple Fritter because it had an extra dough "lug" that could be used to mount donut holes.

Sgtar15
12/23/2002 10:52:44 AM EDT
[#42]
And you just jelly-rolled over!  You wimp!  No resistance, and that's the problem with this contry.  The Gov't will come for ALL our donuts, and pussies like you will hand-em over without a word.

Sheeeeit!
[stick]
Scott
12/23/2002 10:56:08 AM EDT
[#43]
Quoted:
Hmmmm.  Any law against pissing your pants while they frisk you?
View Quote


Most juristictions have a law against urinating in public. Plus if the officer believed you were pissing your pants in an attempt to resist/obstruct/delay him, it would be a 148 charge.

I have never had anyone piss themselves while being searched. More than a few have wet themselves in the back of the car. One sh!t himself when i was cuffing him. Several have Sh1t themselves in responce to a particulary hard blow while resisting arrest.
12/23/2002 11:02:43 AM EDT
[#44]
First they came for the donuts, but I was silent because I have a wheat allergy...
12/23/2002 11:24:26 AM EDT
[#45]
Well, it's a good thing you didn't eat them all, or you would have been cited for carrying concealed donuts without a permit.  And they would have had to hold you 24 hours to retrieve the evidence. [shock]
12/23/2002 11:53:08 AM EDT
[#46]
Never get your fingers between a cops mouth and a jelly donut.
12/23/2002 12:12:48 PM EDT
[#47]

[img]http://www.chicagobutts.com/fat_cop.jpg[/img]


[donut in mouth] Mffgcbplpghxt- whaddyalookin' at?Wantmetarunyain??[/donut in mouth]
12/23/2002 12:12:58 PM EDT
[#48]
That's what you get for putting post-ban donuts in a high-cap box.
12/23/2002 3:33:25 PM EDT
[#49]
Quoted:
And you just jelly-rolled over!  You wimp!  No resistance, and that's the problem with this contry.  The Gov't will come for ALL our donuts, and pussies like you will hand-em over without a word.

Sheeeeit!
[stick]
Scott
View Quote


Listen pal!!  I have a wife and kids to think about!!  Yeah, I willing gave up my Donuts, but I still had bran muffins at home!  And I don't feel under feed with muffins.  Unless you were  in my shoes you can't really say what you would do.  I am not willing to be a Donut test case.  Sure, I could have fought them.  But then I would run the risk of never owning [i[any[/i] type of breakfast food!!

I have drawn my line in sand with lunch foods, until then I will continue fighting via Emails to my Senators while secretly stashing Pop-Tarts for when the BSHTF (Breakfast sausage hits the fan!)

Sgtar15