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11/6/2013 6:29:11 PM EDT
This fucker hangs out outside my window every damn night screeching away and flapping his fucking wings.


11/6/2013 6:31:47 PM EDT
[#1]


they eat millions of mosquitoes, I've even had a bat house before but where I live now there are no bats, there are however millions of mosquitoes

11/6/2013 6:32:00 PM EDT
[#2]
Bats are good to go in my book. They eat bugs.
11/6/2013 6:32:27 PM EDT
[#3]
I'd leave it the fuck alone. Bats are to mosquitoes what AH64 Apaches are to hadjis.
11/6/2013 6:33:25 PM EDT
[#4]
That's a hell of a way to talk about your wife, and murder is illegal.  But really bats are very beneficial.
11/6/2013 6:34:22 PM EDT
[#5]
I was unaware that bats could screech....

Must be the Mexican variety.
11/6/2013 6:34:35 PM EDT
[#6]
as everyone else has said, bats are the tits when it comes to bug and mosquito patrol. that being said 45-70 minimum. .338 lapua for the long bastards.

or look online for those "zombie explosion shells" and walk outside and indiscriminately fire them in the air.
11/6/2013 6:34:57 PM EDT
[#7]
11/6/2013 6:35:44 PM EDT
[#8]
Look, I got no beef with bats in general....

This motherfucker has crossed a line and he needs to expire. He does not shut up and he hangs out in a tree 3' from my window.
11/6/2013 6:35:45 PM EDT
[#9]
or a Batzooka....
11/6/2013 6:36:17 PM EDT
[#10]
Garlic, crosses and a stake to the heart
11/6/2013 6:37:07 PM EDT
[#11]
Mariano Rivera
11/6/2013 6:37:21 PM EDT
[#12]
My brother killed one with a broom. It got in the house and was a bit creepy.

So get a broom and get at it.
11/6/2013 6:37:32 PM EDT
[#13]
Install a bat house where he rousts now and it will likely choose that as opposed to your window.  They are definitely good to have around.
11/6/2013 6:37:56 PM EDT
[#14]

You have almost 16,000 posts on a site called 'AR15.com' and you don't know how to kill a damn bat?

If your method doesn't involve a bayonet and multiple back-to-back mag dumps you are doing it wrong.
11/6/2013 6:38:27 PM EDT
[#15]

Quoted:


This fucker hangs out outside my window every damn night screeching away and flapping his fucking wings.





View Quote
12 gauge #7 shot.



 
11/6/2013 6:38:28 PM EDT
[#16]
.22lr - left eye
11/6/2013 6:38:31 PM EDT
[#17]
Ironically, with a bat.
11/6/2013 6:38:55 PM EDT
[#18]

Quoted:


This fucker hangs out outside my window every damn night screeching away and flapping his fucking wings.





View Quote
are you stuck on stupid?







 
11/6/2013 6:39:41 PM EDT
[#19]
IIRC bats are protected and killing them is illegal, might want to do it quietly
11/6/2013 6:41:06 PM EDT
[#20]
cut the tree down
11/6/2013 6:41:07 PM EDT
[#21]
I prefer running and flailing my arms why screaming "they're in my hair" seems to do the trick.
11/6/2013 6:41:25 PM EDT
[#22]
Quote History
Quoted:
Ironically, with a bat.
View Quote


I can't see the bastard.  I could indiscriminately chunk a bat into the air and hope for the best but I'd probably hit something valuable.

He comes to the tree at night and just fucking chills for a while. He will fly off to eat shit and come right back and start chattering away.
11/6/2013 6:41:26 PM EDT
[#23]
Brake cleaner or a tennis racket.  Tennis racket is quicker.
11/6/2013 6:41:52 PM EDT
[#24]
Quote History
Quoted:
cut the tree down
View Quote


This idea is growing on me.
11/6/2013 6:42:06 PM EDT
[#25]
Check your laws. Probably illegal to molest or kill bats.
11/6/2013 6:42:44 PM EDT
[#26]
Pellet gun.

When I would stay at my (now) mother-in-law's place to see my (now) wife on weekends, the guest room was at the back of the house. Every frickin' morning without fail, a mockingbird would show up on the fence out back at about 5:05 and start it's raucous song, waking my monkey ass up early. Hell to the no!

I went down to Big 5 sporting goods and grabbed a pellet gun and a pack of pellets. Next morning, I was lying in wait for the bird.

No bird, no screech, no mo'.
11/6/2013 6:42:56 PM EDT
[#27]
Quote History
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Quoted:
Quoted:
This fucker hangs out outside my window every damn night screeching away and flapping his fucking wings.


are you stuck on stupid?

http://www.strangepolitics.com/images/content/130602.gif
 




Piss off.

I'm problem solving here.
11/6/2013 6:44:43 PM EDT
[#28]
They are mammals, but not porpoises.
You could try a stake through the heart, it works for vampires.
11/6/2013 6:45:27 PM EDT
[#29]
Scaredy Bat
11/6/2013 6:45:44 PM EDT
[#30]
Give it three strikes, and he's out...
11/6/2013 6:46:18 PM EDT
[#31]
well the is only one solution..

you obviously live in bat country and must move...
11/6/2013 6:46:52 PM EDT
[#32]
Quote History
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Quoted:
Quoted:
This fucker hangs out outside my window every damn night screeching away and flapping his fucking wings.


are you stuck on stupid?

http://www.strangepolitics.com/images/content/130602.gif
 


11/6/2013 6:47:28 PM EDT
[#33]
Quote History
Quoted:
Look, I got no beef with bats in general....

This motherfucker has crossed a line and he needs to expire. He does not shut up and he hangs out in a tree 3' from my window.
View Quote



Look up your local bat rescues.  Build a bat box away from your window?
11/6/2013 6:48:18 PM EDT
[#34]
Quote History
Quoted:


I can't see the bastard.  I could indiscriminately chunk a bat into the air and hope for the best but I'd probably hit something valuable.

He comes to the tree at night and just fucking chills for a while. He will fly off to eat shit and come right back and start chattering away.
View Quote View All Quotes
View All Quotes
Quote History
Quoted:
Quoted:
Ironically, with a bat.


I can't see the bastard.  I could indiscriminately chunk a bat into the air and hope for the best but I'd probably hit something valuable.

He comes to the tree at night and just fucking chills for a while. He will fly off to eat shit and come right back and start chattering away.


Lean far, far out of your window at night and flail about wildly with a Louisville Slugger.  


Alternatively, get a much larger and more viscous bat as a pet, that will murder and eat this little guy.  I saw bats in Fiji that looked big enough to carry off small children.  

11/6/2013 6:48:28 PM EDT
[#35]
Are you sure it's a bat?   We have them all over the place here and I've never heard them make a sound.
11/6/2013 6:48:57 PM EDT
[#36]
Quote History
Quoted:
Check your laws. Probably illegal to molest or kill bats.
View Quote


I don't think he said anything about fingering the bat.
11/6/2013 6:49:04 PM EDT
[#37]
Quoted:
This fucker hangs out outside my window every damn night screeching away and flapping his fucking wings.


View Quote

Well the second poster pointed out, the bat kills mosquitos... frankly I'd rather have the bat.

However you also don't want it living in your house so, why not have your roof looked at... likely there's a hole in there somewhere that the bat's getting in through and building a nest.
11/6/2013 6:50:02 PM EDT
[#38]
Quote History
Quoted:


they eat millions of mosquitoes, I've even had a bat house before but where I live now there are no bats, there are however millions of mosquitoes

View Quote



Unless it's a fruit bat.
11/6/2013 6:52:30 PM EDT
[#39]
Prepare its anus.

11/6/2013 6:52:54 PM EDT
[#40]
Quoted:
This fucker hangs out outside my window every damn night screeching away and flapping his fucking wings.


View Quote


The only way is to make up several (10-20) Molotov cocktail.  At dark when he is sitting in his tree, hide around corner of the house, light the Molotovs and then jump out from around the corner and throw them all onto the tree (easier if you have several friends to help).  Try to throw them at the top of the tree, the base and everywhere in between.  Sit back and watch the fucker burn.  
11/6/2013 6:55:27 PM EDT
[#41]
Build this.
11/6/2013 6:56:14 PM EDT
[#42]
This is what the little bastard does, but he does it voluntarily and without hesitation.

11/6/2013 6:59:14 PM EDT
[#43]
If you had a 'possum your problem would go away.
11/6/2013 7:00:27 PM EDT
[#44]
Quote History
Quoted:
I was unaware that bats could screech....

Must be the Mexican variety.
View Quote


I've never heard one screech,
Maybe Canada has screeching bats.
11/6/2013 7:02:45 PM EDT
[#45]
Quote History
Quoted:
This is what the little bastard does, but he does it voluntarily and without hesitation.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9CIXaCXRzXo
View Quote



Whatever dude.

Leave it alone.
11/6/2013 7:08:13 PM EDT
[#46]
Quote History
Quoted:



Whatever dude.

Leave it alone.
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Quote History
Quoted:
Quoted:
This is what the little bastard does, but he does it voluntarily and without hesitation.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9CIXaCXRzXo



Whatever dude.

Leave it alone.


Nope, this one has earned retribution.
11/6/2013 7:09:30 PM EDT
[#47]
Quote History
Quoted:


Nope, this one has earned retribution.
View Quote View All Quotes
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Quote History
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
This is what the little bastard does, but he does it voluntarily and without hesitation.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9CIXaCXRzXo



Whatever dude.

Leave it alone.


Nope, this one has earned retribution.



Do you have a suppressed 22?
11/6/2013 7:15:40 PM EDT
[#48]
Give it an "Ozzie"
11/6/2013 7:27:23 PM EDT
[#49]
Hang a fishing line from a porch or branch where you know the bat is flying. If it is hanging outside your window, find a few branches or something. Attach a fly lure with hook on the end. A fan or two to make the fly move a bit will help.

Your welcome

11/6/2013 8:03:57 PM EDT
[#50]
I know bats are beneficial but have you considered a 12ga?
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