Posted: 11/16/2002 7:47:25 AM EDT
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1. "I can't find it" MEANS: It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I am completely clueless. 2. "That's women's work" MEANS: It's difficult, dirty, and thankless. 3. "Will you marry me?" MEANS: Both of my roommates have moved out, I can't find the washer, and there's no peanut butter left. 4. "It's a guy thing." MEANS: There's no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical. 5. "Can I help with dinner?" MEANS: Why isn't it already on the table? 6. "It would take too long to explain" MEANS: I have no idea how it works. 7. "I'm getting more exercise lately" MEANS: The batteries in the remote are dead. 8. "We're going to be late." MEANS: I have a legitimate reason for driving like a maniac. 9. "Take a break, honey, you're working too hard." MEANS: I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner. 10. "That's interesting dear." MEANS: Are you still talkin |
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Translating womenz: Do you like the blue dress better or the red one? Means: You're so screwed boy. Do you think I look fat in that dress? Means: Kill yourself now, there is no safe answer. Nothing. Means: You fucked up, and you better try to make up for it, but I won't tell you what I think you did wrong. Sure, go ahead, if you have to. Means: You do that, and you'll sleep on the couch the next 3 weeks. ... |
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ME: I need a new truck. WIFE: Your truck is just a few years old. ME: Yeah, but the warranty has expired and you know it cost a fortune to work on these things. WIFE: Well, if you really think so, go ahead. ME: Come look at my new truck. WIFE: YOU BOUGHT A NEW TRUCK? WHY? I CAN"T BELIEVE YOU DID THAT WITHOUT TALKING TO ME FIRST! YOU HAVE TO TAKE IT BACK! I'M SO...yada, yada, yada, blah, blah, blah........ I got my new truck. Eddie |