Posted: 10/21/2013 10:50:30 PM EDT
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I keep reading these articles that say people still live with their parents until their early 30's. Iv'e seen boomers reference it in a lot of generational war threads. They say they still foot the bills for their kids and have to care for elderly parents. Both of which are admirable traits BTW.
My question is what is the living situation like in these situations. Do the kids have jobs, wives, girlfriends. Do the parents tell them when to go to bed. Do they have chores, Do they cook for their parents, mow the lawn? Do their friends come over to watch the game? Do girlfriends/boyfriends spend the night? Is it like high school and there's a party when the parents are out of town this weekend? I don't know why I just can't picture these scenarios. I know and have lived with other cultures for short amounts of time: a month here or there where this type of family situation is common and it works fine if not better in some situations. But most of these cultures have rather conservative values. Some even arranged marriages and what not. So I am not trying to say its bad or judge it. Just curious how it goes. |
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IMHO it depends. Is the youngster still living at home a slacker? Or someone who has had the rug pulled out from underneath their feet and is needing some temp help until they get another job? Or, are they at home by choice to assist with home healthcare for their elderly parent(s)? And I don't think you can generalize the home dynamics, as those would vary by family. |
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Agreed, it depends. If said 20-something is still working towards a degree, saving for a house of their own, trying to get back on their feet after losing a job, or living at home to help their older/sickly parents, there's nothing to be ashamed of at all. If they're living at home just as a way to avoid paying rent and then use that money to buy high-priced toys (car, guns, etc.), then yeah, something is wrong. |
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i have no problem with kids staying at home while in school or working to save for a wedding, down payment on a house, etc. if you are sitting on your ass watching tv and eating my food without contributing to society or the household then you have to go.
i work with a sweet lady who has 2 boys 19 and 21 who both still live at home and have never had jobs. they stay up all night and sleep all day. they both have cars and insurance that she pays for. i went over to her house to cut a tree off her car that fell in a storm and both of them looked like they had never been outside. goofier than shit. |
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I wouldn't know.
I told my children that coming home was not an option for them unless it involved an illness or something severe. I "front loaded" them. Gave them everything that I could to get them good educations that would give them a good life. I told them not to waste the opportunity because if they did, they were on their own...... I wasn't supporting them for life. It worked, they are making more than I ever dreamed of, are totally self sufficient and thank me often. |
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My 40+yo brother lives in my Dad's basement and pays nothing & contributes nothing, so he fits the parasitic slacker category.
So, I'm guessing not all folks living with a parent are useless POS. But in this case....oh, and no girlfriend--but he CAN tell you where every adult book store is in the east coast. 
My wife's girlfriends met him years ago & describe him as "creepy." I hope YMMV |
| I'm curious how I would have ended up if I got the boot at 18. I stayed at home a GOOD while longer but was working the entire time since age 17. Never payed rent but paid my own credit card bill, car payment, insurance. Managed to save a decent amount of money. Now that I moved out and live with a buddy of mine it's pretty much the same except now my mother just misses me a lot. |
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My question is what is the living situation like in these situations. Do the kids have jobs, wives, girlfriends. Do the parents tell them when to go to bed. Do they have chores, Do they cook for their parents, mow the lawn? Do their friends come over to watch the game? Do girlfriends/boyfriends spend the night? Is it like high school and there's a party when the parents are out of town this weekend? In my brothers house. Nephew 28yrs old. In and out of rehab. Constantly wrecking vehicles, probably been through 9-10 so far. Baby out of wedlock and my parents and his parents baby sit all the time. Oh, cant hold a job. Neice. Drunk drunk drunk except for when she is in class, then she is less drunk. Had a baby at 17 and shit is so fucked up my brother and sis inlaw are going to adopt her. Which is no big deal as they watch her 24/7 and pay for everything including my neices school. My neice cusses out my sis inlaw and is generally ignorant. Theres more, but you get the picture. Spoiled rotten brats. |