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Link Posted: 5/14/2014 7:59:07 AM EDT
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Originally Posted By Former11BRAVO:
Poor Sylvia!

It must be tough to think yourself so smart, so wily - only to (soon) discover you never had a clue.

Her cocky, authoritarian-smugness illustrates perfectly the disconnect between Ivy Leaguers and beltway types and the rest of the nation: "flyover country" if you will - the real heartbeat of the US. People who've never created anything in their lives have no frame of reference with which to evaluate the results of an inspired, enterprising, free man's/family's labor in any meaningful or useful context.

Concepts and traits such as hard work & loving what you do (and who you are), possession of an intense pride of personal/familial heritage and history . . . (sigh)

She may as well have suddenly found herself on Mars.

If she weren't such a self-righteous bitch, I could almost feel sorry for her.

View Quote

I had a supervisor like her.  Female, red head and Polish.  As well as a GS13.  I see so much of her in Silvia
Link Posted: 5/14/2014 8:37:07 AM EDT
That's hate fuck material!
Link Posted: 5/14/2014 12:44:33 PM EDT
[Last Edit: DCBourone] [#3]

Going back in the comments a bit--

FieldMP and HBruns, I see some strong votes for continuing present level of density in images/ideas/background/etc.

Problem is extent to which we are a bunch of self-selected and self-aggregating information/history/fact junkies,

relative to a larger audience.  Genre-bending, which I am doing here, is statistically very risky.  Most of the most

successful writing in this genre is written at about the level of a Louis L'Amour western.

HBrun your comment about the stars in the private gate is a perfect example of how far to go in let's say, describing

a gate.  I have some ideas here, which constellation(s) and in what orientation.  Orion looks good.

Sixgunner455 and Miles Urb, much thanks.  MilesUrb on print size, I've been fiddling with that off and on.  Might

reduce a bit in later installments.  And I wish I could write faster too!

oldcrank, much thanks.  This will get finished in next two-three months, and hopefully many more, unless I die.

And I am historically pretty durable.

Mounger your comment .re Injured Reserves.  Stepping lightly, I hope: the simple comment about "being over your head"

suggests awareness of the possibility that there are things "that are over your head" which is a kind of wisdom that very few people

have these days, when everybody is fabulous in their own minds.  

I'll take wisdom over raw intellect any day.  Sylvia C. Meyer is technically 'smart'--and she is also a fucking

moron.  Injured Reserves was written with zero concession to any genre or style.  It is an extremely complex text.  If you ever

return to it, think of it as a very purposeful puzzle, or a Grand Complication watch.  Pull on the string "when the sirens sound, will

our shadows be our shepherds" and see what unravels.  Imagine it as a kind of bible, and moral and performance guide, for

The Deputy and his friends, all of whom you will eventually meet.  It is actually modeled on a kind of mission statement, under

the premise that if you understand a person's heroes, you understand them.

grywlf52, much thanks, and looks like I need to make some edits.  This is first pass stuff, and when I eventually assemble

the entire text I clearly have a shit-load of work left to do.

Former11Bravo, yeah you got it, and her, and the central divide in culture(s).  You already have a pretty good idea of what

she did, and is doing, and has been done.  Trust me: she will have an extended moment of reflection.

2T2, Sylvia will have many opportunities to save herself, and do the right thing.  She won't.  Bummer for her.

Link Posted: 5/14/2014 3:00:45 PM EDT
No need to step lightly OP.  Thank you for the guidance and I gladly accept the assignment to revisit Injured Reserves with the primer of context you have provided.  Thanks!!

Regarding your personal struggle as to what degree of detail to write the rest of the book:

The most difficult times of my life are when I tried to do or be something I'm not.  I found later that had I approached the issue as "me" or "the way I'm wired" things would have turned out better and/or at least have been easier/less stressful.

Equating personal experience with something so personal as YOUR writing, I suggest that you write this story and all stories from the heart.  That is what you WANT to do.  That is what you feel the personal NEED to do.  That is how you SHOULD do.

Anything less than writing it the way that is personally gratifyng to you, well I can't imagine you how the finished work can be of the quality for the reader your looking for.  

Regarding the finished product:  Thats what professional editors are for.  If it needs to be changed to a certain level to "sell".  Let them do their job and make you money.  They will figure out what, if anything to take out.  But it will be absolutely impossible for them or anyone else to ADD to your writing.
Link Posted: 5/14/2014 4:27:44 PM EDT
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Originally Posted By DCBourone:
Former11Bravo, yeah you got it, and her, and the central divide in culture(s).  You already have a pretty good idea of what
she did, and is doing, and has been done.  Trust me: she will have an extended moment of reflection.
View Quote

Link Posted: 5/14/2014 4:45:37 PM EDT
Why am I guessing that the milling machine is going to drop a 3-D likeness of the Deputy right in front of Meyer.

She is supposed to make him go away.  He is going to be shrined in eternity.
Link Posted: 5/14/2014 5:25:26 PM EDT
I am really really trying to stay out of excessive comments on my own stuff, but comment above

concerning dropping a 3-D likeness of The Deputy, dude, it was that or something else, another

repeated motif.  But yep you are EXACTLY on the right track.  

Just exactly.

Some sins merit a good, long, haunting.

Ok, more tonight.  The Gear Ranch exposure is a good long chunk of this thing, tons of backstory,

taking longer than I thought.  

Forensic interest: Amazon defines a page as 250 words.  this thing is right at 35,000 words now.

So, easy 140 pages.  And, yeah, this is still the set-up.  So most likely end up at 100,000 words plus.
Link Posted: 5/14/2014 7:29:57 PM EDT
I wanna work for the Gerhrs.
Link Posted: 5/14/2014 8:19:53 PM EDT
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Originally Posted By BLG:
I wanna work for the Gerhrs.
View Quote

Fuck yeah! I wonder if they need a Logistician... I'd wager they have a private airfield with a couple C130's
Link Posted: 5/15/2014 3:27:24 AM EDT
[Last Edit: DCBourone] [#10]
BLG and 2T2 your comments are so predictive as to be uncanny.  Means I am doing my job?

Or being too obvious.

A small installment.  I look forward to your predictions as to what the Gehr ranch is.  And what

the Gehr's and their associates call themselves...

Link Posted: 5/15/2014 4:10:09 AM EDT
Not predictable in the shallow writing sense... Predictable in that it is so well written you can imagine it, and anticipate what a real Gehrig family would have, just based off the tip of the iceberg you give us. It encourages the imagination to play.
Link Posted: 5/15/2014 7:43:34 AM EDT
Are the Gehr's / Geers adopting?  I am 1/4 German so maybe I would fit in?  Please continue with your story.  This is no mere "setup" chapter(s), this is immersive cinema of the mind's eye!

And now for something completely different.....

Link Posted: 5/15/2014 10:12:38 AM EDT
I read all 7 pages last night.  I am an old man and avid reader with no remarkable incite to add, except to say that you are extremely talented.  Thank you for posting this OP!
Link Posted: 5/15/2014 10:26:17 AM EDT
Groton Connecticut for the nukes... Otherwise very nice!
Link Posted: 5/15/2014 12:41:24 PM EDT
Been lurkin', now addicted to this story.  Very good writing, perfect level of detail.  Can't hardly wait for more.

Sylvia, brings to mind an old quote (paraphrased);  No one is so blind as those who will not see.
Link Posted: 5/15/2014 5:51:32 PM EDT
[Last Edit: BLG] [#16]
After serious contemplation, in front of my keyboard, I'll hazard this. I have a back ground, well several really, widows son, USAF,SP, machinist, inspector/CWI,( now mumbling to myself, old money, how old ?, France/Germany(knights) /Israel(Jerusleum) = Templer, nah couldn't be, that far?, that IS old money.) The Gehrs lineage can obviously be traced at least that far back, gates, . Weaponry ,in abundance apparently. T2T mentioned C130's, maybe a couple, probably more like vintage/ refurbished Starlifters or with maybe a Galaxy or 2 for good measure, with that kind of money and lets get it out in the open  Grandpa DOES have lotsa contacts. (Wish I could network like that) . Peel back some of that mesquite and you might just find a runway for 'em. Fuel ?, get out a metal detector an probly find that and all the spare parts too . Seems the Gehrs leave nothing to chance. There's gotta be a serious Mfg facility besides the automated center they've already found. Ah, but security will prevent that, cameras can't be all of it. Plus lots of military background in the family to boot. Hard to imagine a families lineage being that forth right thru the ages. Would really like to meet a man like Grandpa. They would undoubtably have like minded individuals employed, (I need to work for them). Old world sense of right and wrong and intensley sure of his and his families destiny in the world. To make it all right when the time comes, or re-make it right if need be.,I need to shut up.
      Sorry OP. its your thread.

PS its not a ranch its a world within a world, waiting its time to get out.
Link Posted: 5/15/2014 6:38:23 PM EDT
If they are smart they wouldn't touch a fucking C5 with a 10ft pole!
Link Posted: 5/15/2014 10:54:05 PM EDT
Great story so far.

Link Posted: 5/16/2014 4:23:42 AM EDT
[Last Edit: DCBourone] [#19]
2T2, predictable, I copy, much appreciated.  C5's, your comments appreciated.  Big payload, long runways.

GreenGiant, yes the Gehrs are always adopting.  Talent is where you find it.  Watch Brian Distrop.

Piddler, old or not, I will call on you.  This voice will die or be replaced with zombie porn.  Without...yeah, you.

So stone the fuck up, if you will pardon me.  Old is a state of mind, until you actually die.  So fuck old an

vmpglenn, Groton, much thanks.   A classic correction of a writer's screw up writing fast, and from memory.  There

is a facility in Mass. and I don't want to look it up now.  Groton has the...enough said.  Good eye, dude.

kjwagner, yes, good quotes in this domain: never try to teach a man anything which interferes with his income. Or

ambition.  Or tribe.  Etc. Etc. Etc.---

BLG and 2T2, I might have to quite seriously request that you both resist from posting your insights, as they now

constitute spoilers.  Really good eye, gentleman.  BLG, your contemplations on history, the Templars, and...um pretty

much everything are pre-cognitive.  The Gears have an air-strip.  Old Man Gear flies a Gulfstream.  He will be home


BLB, on melding in its infancy, you are exactly correct.  Same time, same characters, everybody on the way
to the same place.  The Gehr facility.  And those like it.  Because the Gehrs have a very extended family.  And
The Gear Ranch is not alone...

Ron4569, thanks.  Just getting started, I hope.

Wish I had more for tonight, this would be a micro-teaser.  But time here competes with time there.

I see a few more looks at Injured Reserves.  Thank you.  You will see later how this is the text to which

they all refer.  "Combat is the control of your adversary in the three dimensions of space.  Across the fourth

dimension of time."

And that is where we are.

Link Posted: 5/16/2014 4:56:44 AM EDT
my bad brother.
I am just fucking loving the story so much it gets the mind running. I'll predict to myself!

Another chapter
Link Posted: 5/16/2014 6:52:32 AM EDT
[Last Edit: Former11BRAVO] [#21]
You know . . . the only thing bothering me about the plot's premise is that the Gehrs could so successfully operate under the radar, as they obviously have.

You'd think that (incompetent or not,) someone as plugged in as ol' Sylvia would know of such a group/family in her AO. She's got to have advisors/intel, lest she couldn't have seen the level of success she has - neither professionally (thus far), nor with her "evil scheme". Needless to say, immensely wealthy capitalists (& ferocious patriots) like the Gehrs would need to be eliminated before the conspiracy to collapse the US/world system could move forward; let alone, come to fruition/succeed long-term.

Despite the "fact" that the Gehrs have been on the "down low" for a couple generations, there would had to have been be rumors about them, at least - rumors which would've pricked the ears of villains like Sylvia Meyers - villains with the resources of the fed gov't behind them (or, the cartels, for that matter). Since the Gehrs are still involved with gov't contracts (as per the holes in the gate), there would be whispers of them, which should've inspired far more that a cursory investigation . . .

Maybe the majority of their production facilities should be depicted as underground, OP - invisible to drone or sat detection. Surely, the bad guys have been surveilling the area for some time . . . I know that idea is distasteful (as per your wonderful descriptions of the gate & garden, et al), but it might be more realistic. After all, as educated and knowledgeable as the Gehrs are, they'd be well-aware of the danger posed by such gov't technology/ability.


I am still loving the story, though - very, very much - and I sincerely hope you take my comments in the spirit in which they are intended, as they are in no way meant to diminish the inspired writing you've done thus far.

Thanks again for sharing!  
Link Posted: 5/16/2014 12:35:25 PM EDT
Thanks for the latest installment!!  I keep checking this story to the point of excessive compulsive now!
Link Posted: 5/16/2014 2:32:31 PM EDT
[Last Edit: DCBourone] [#23]
Mounger, as always, thanks.

2T2, No harm no foul, dude.

Former11B--somewhere in here you will begin to assume that your questions will be answered.  Briefly,

it is much better to hide in plain sight.  Consider scaling up your sense of who the Gehrs are.  They are fully known.  

They are fully known as a titanic obstacle.   Maybe they, AND THOSE LIKE THEM, are THE obstacle.

I don't want to speculate too much in this space, because the consensual group mind in collective scrutiny

would certainly come up with option sets which would act as pretty severe spoilers.

I am hoping people will be able to see this story evolve organically, and at each individual's own pace.

One of the problems with these installments spread across many pages is that stuff gets lost.  For instance, we

have already seen Brian Distrop have a near panic attack when he realized where he was, try to make a call, AND HIS PHONE DID

NOT WORK.  Assume that is not an accident.  Also, in the grand scheme, how important is Sylvia to her 'bosses'?   Maybe not very.

Maybe she is a little cog in a big machine.  She knows The Deputy as Deputy Gear.  Just some troublesome dude, in one of a hundred plus

counties in Texas. Very very easy for the Gehrs to arrange.  

Think about the clumsiness, and exposure, of many recent scandals from inception to discovery.  The only reason those scandals have not destroyed the principals is because we now have a fully compliant press. Fortunately in this case, Arrogance is an acid which eats away the best laid plans.

The Gehrs took a big hit.

They don't play nice.

And pay-back is going to be a bitch.

P.S. Pop Gehr is flying his own Gulfstream all the hell over Europe, tidying things up.  He will be back shortly.  It would be

safe to assume he has multiple air-strips at his disposal.  A detailed map search of rural Texas would show many startling

features on private property.

P.S. MilesUrb and Alex_F I see your notes on the other story.  A big issue for me, and a hard choice.  At some point

I figured The Deputy and his son served best to show the Gehrs and what they have built, because they/it/them

are the central point of what I hope will be a long series of books.  The truck dude was one of The Deputy's

best friends, and is on his way to the Gehrs.  There were four men total on The Deputy's old crew.  I hope

to write stories from all their points of view.

P.S. On complexity: this is not to excuse errors I make.  But a great deal of the continual choice of options in

composing something like this might be described as 'aim' -- what demographic to select for?  We don't have

"reading rooms" or "libraries" in homes anymore.  Peak complexity in language probably occurred in the time

of Victor Hugo and Dickens.  Technology: printing, lighting, indoor heating--and a new middle class, and the first moments

of leisure all arrived at about the same time, in such a way that reading for pleasure, and information, was a significant

competitor with all other forms of entertainment/discretionary activities.  That age is obviously long over.  For those

of you with a forensic interest in language, I trust I am not violating TOS when I say there is an example, a free example,

of extreme complexity if you search my name and "Wet or Dry"--there is no market for that story.  I see that two of

you have pursued that story to its bitter end.  I know one of those people now.  I hope the other contacts me at some

point.  And Thank you, gentlemen, and now we are a community of...three.

Tonight/tomorrow's installment should be longer.  Time competing with time here.


Link Posted: 5/16/2014 4:55:53 PM EDT
DCB, the one thing about this story that bothers me is that Grandpa Gehr seems to be OK with his son and grandson going toe-to-toe with cartel bad boys.  Wealthy, powerful folks simply don't do that.  I suppose in the actual book it could be explained as a "warrior mentality thingy", but it would seem to need to be addressed.
Link Posted: 5/16/2014 5:39:15 PM EDT
good story. I am in.
Link Posted: 5/16/2014 6:12:15 PM EDT
My sincerest apologies, DCB, for the "spoiler part" (GUILTY) perhaps my earlier ramblings on the story line involved too much thinking on my part. But , ohhh, if there were individuals with this kind of a sense of patriotism, to want to promote the well being of mankind, and the wherewithal to indeed implement such an under taking. Well I'll shut up OP. Just lurking and immensely enjoying from this point forward, your story. And all the other character points of view in the future we hope you'll share.(Please get GrandPa home soon,I can't wait to see LMB get put in her place, LOL, I am your loyal reader).

Link Posted: 5/18/2014 4:07:08 AM EDT
[Last Edit: DCBourone] [#27]
Piddler, good call.  If at some point you back track through this thing I hope you find "set-ups" and "answers"--in the film
business this is called "a series of 'reveals'"--in other words, a question posed to the subconscious or conscious mind
of the viewer, implying a question which must be answered.  I want to avoid spoilers, but I will do my best to answer your questions.

Link Posted: 5/18/2014 4:24:33 AM EDT
Talk about mean.

How you just going to leave everyone hanging like that.
Link Posted: 5/18/2014 4:51:30 AM EDT
Yeah you lay that deep pipe... Then get back to work writing for us.

Great chapter, torturous cliff hanger. LOL
Link Posted: 5/18/2014 11:26:15 AM EDT
Third to last sentence you have The reached, it should read They reached.

MY guess is that Meyers saw a masked man.
Link Posted: 5/18/2014 11:35:25 AM EDT
Link Posted: 5/18/2014 2:10:30 PM EDT

Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Originally Posted By beakerello:

Third to last sentence you have The reached, it should read They reached.

MY guess is that Meyers saw a masked man.
View Quote

Or the machines cutting the globe of glass carved a life size replica of her head...

I can't wait for the next chapter.

Link Posted: 5/18/2014 3:49:50 PM EDT
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Originally Posted By 2T2_Crash:
Yeah you lay that deep pipe... Then get back to work writing for us.

Great chapter, torturous cliff hanger. LOL
View Quote

This!!  You are an EVIL man DC!!

Thanks for the awesome chapter!
Link Posted: 5/18/2014 4:57:30 PM EDT

Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Originally Posted By Mounger:
This!!  You are an EVIL man DC!!

Thanks for the awesome chapter!
View Quote View All Quotes
View All Quotes
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Originally Posted By Mounger:

Originally Posted By 2T2_Crash:

Yeah you lay that deep pipe... Then get back to work writing for us.

Great chapter, torturous cliff hanger. LOL

This!!  You are an EVIL man DC!!

Thanks for the awesome chapter!
Now you're deliberately toying and tormenting us!


Just figured out what just happened ... <evil grin> ... now going to bite my fingers!
Link Posted: 5/19/2014 5:44:45 PM EDT
Brian won't regret a word I'm thinkin'. Hangin' by my finger nails.
Link Posted: 5/19/2014 10:02:50 PM EDT
Part of me wishes I hadn't seen this until it is completed.
The other part of me loves the suspense of installments.

Link Posted: 5/20/2014 2:27:12 AM EDT
[Last Edit: DCBourone] [#37]
Piddler, Belted, Blg, BidDam, 2LT, beakerelllo, 45Pro, greyguy: very close, Mounger, a steady strain of confidence thanks, Image Currently, I see you, and your family, carry on.  And thank you.  BLG and Ifix5o'

Link Posted: 5/20/2014 6:46:44 AM EDT
You continue to do it.  Man, I need to just leave this thread for a few days.  It's my morning fix to see what new piece you have written for us.  Bravo man.  Bravo
Link Posted: 5/20/2014 6:58:35 AM EDT
It's a good thing my wife had already left by the time I discovered these last two entries - lest, I'd have ignored her completely until I'd finished them!

I doubt I'd have even noticed her closing the door to go!

As always, kudos to you, OP. Just . . . lovin' it!  
Link Posted: 5/20/2014 2:02:20 PM EDT
OK, enough.  

Publish the whole thing on Amazon for 6 or 8 bucks, I'm tired of reading dribs and drabs.

Link Posted: 5/20/2014 2:29:55 PM EDT
NOOOOOO!!!!  Don't listen to Alex_F!! Please post much more HERE, THEN send to Amazon, B&N, etc so we can BUY the whole thing!
Link Posted: 5/20/2014 2:32:35 PM EDT
Good job, enjoying it immensely.  Did notice typo.....
a live sized copy
View Quote

Can't wait, need moar
Link Posted: 5/20/2014 3:24:58 PM EDT
I haven't really been proof reading, just enjoying.  This is going to be a great book.
Link Posted: 5/20/2014 4:45:45 PM EDT
You magnificent bastard.  I'm reading your book...

(One chapter at a time.  More please!!!)

Seriously, fantastic so far.  If 'impatiently awaiting next installment' can be a compliment, please accept it as such.
Link Posted: 5/20/2014 4:48:02 PM EDT
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Originally Posted By PIDDLER:
I haven't really been proof reading, just enjoying.
View Quote

Same here.

I've noticed the typos, but felt it'd be tacky to point 'em out.

(hint, hint)  
Link Posted: 5/20/2014 5:05:53 PM EDT
excellent. kutgw.
Link Posted: 5/20/2014 5:19:27 PM EDT
Chuckle, chuckle, the LMB, just hit the floor, chuckle, chuckle. Bet that ain't the end of it.
Link Posted: 5/21/2014 12:09:51 AM EDT
Ok, I have just read this entire thing and must admit I am enthralled with it.  Will there be more on ARFcom or will I have to wait for it to be published?  I'm not much on reading digital books as I am old fashioned.  How can we find the rest of this fascinating story?  (OP- golf clap sir!)
Link Posted: 5/21/2014 1:17:35 AM EDT
[Last Edit: DCBourone] [#49]
grywlf52, much thanks as always.  Would like to get a 1000 words, about four pages, up every day, sometimes not possible.

NOTE FOR EVERYONE: I will begin posting not only the date but the TIME, U.S. Central, when I update the text, on the first page, and that will show IN THE TITLE LINE of "The Soldier's Son" on the first page of "Survival Fiction."  Might save you come clicks.

Former11B, much thanks.  Lots of good data and recommends in your posts.  I am really paying attention here, because outside of a few very close friends, you are the first viewers/early adopters.  On typos: I have super talented proof reader for later, but if
you catch something, no prob if you point it out.  And any technical detail or story problems?  Hammer it. I will make mistakes.  So bring the hammer down.

Alex_F, much thanks.  You are watching a continuing process, I have about 100,000 words roughed out, you are seeing a first pass edit, still pretty rough/unfinished.  We have a long way to go.  Your recommendation here leads me to:

ntleman.  Because it is also a cultural artifact of immense significance, a meeting of minds, an example of the one thing our overlords missed, and are desperately trying to control.  I would hope to be an enhancement to this site.  In the future I will always submit the first sample of what I hope to be a continuing body of work, here, first.

GreenGiant, I hear you, I hope the post above explains a bit.  There will be many many more installments here.

kc215, much thanks, I see your typo, must fix, good eye.

Piddler, thanks dude, I hope you can hang with this because I promise you I will answer/justify your earlier question.

RevolverRO, if you are doing what I am trying to do, your comments are as good as it gets.  Much appreciated.

sixgunner455, much thanks, good to see you, so.  Do you carry that Webley?

BLG, thanks brother.  I look forward to your posts.

Tipsovr, good to see you.  I hope information here/above has helped.  Many more installments will be here on Ar15.com.

Ok, back to work.


Link Posted: 5/21/2014 2:53:26 AM EDT
DCB - no way! It's a Hollis, actually, and dates to about 1870. The BP rounds it would fire are big, but it might actually be a .476. Got it in Afghanistan during my '02-'03 world tour. The cylinder lock bolt is worn down, so the cylinder spins freely. Finish is basically gone. It's a cool old gun, but it hasn't been a real good carry gun in a long time.
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