Posted: 3/8/2007 6:00:45 AM EDT
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I have a question for you fine gentlemen (and ladies) On Monday I will be going to MEPS in Des Moines IA for a physical, anything I should know ahead of time? I'm going into the Navy's Degree Completion Program which means I will be enlisted in college (but assigned to my school), and after graduation going to OCS. Thanks in advance. Sam |
| I pretty much the same program in the Army. You will be herded around like everyone else. Take a book and have fun listening to all the kids talk around you about what they are going to do. I was prior enlisted before I got picked up in the Army program I'm in. I get a kick out of listing to all of the kids with all the high hopes. |
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Man MEPS sucked. I remember being in a room with 60 dudes in their underwear sitting shoulder to shoulder and I thought that was pretty bad. Then it was my turn to see the Doc... These were his exact words, "Bend over and spread 'em, show me the brown eye." I felt used. Actually, on second thought HE'S the one who had to look at man butthole all day, I guess the joke was on him! |
+1 Also stay away from banana hammocks. Like others have said; you will be sitting around in your underwear for a bit, so wear something that you won't be shamed to wear. |
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they juggle your junk they bend you over and spread the cheeks no dingle berries  be very clean,a nd polite, they will eb looking for anything that may disqualiify you from the service, do not tell them anything they already do not know about your physical health, such as "i had a burning in the crotch one time" they will stop the proceedure and make you get a dr clearance before going on with the enlistment program "my heart skipped some beats once" you will need to see a heart specialist before you move to the next phase tell them nothing, have fun, and thanks for your soon to be service to our country |
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be very careful what you say. your recruiter should have briefed you on how to accurately answer the docs questions without fucking yourself. saying the wrong things to the doc can permanently or temporarily disqualify you. example. he might ask if you ever get headaches, maybe you get them after you go out drinking, so you tell him yea every now and then after i drink. next thing you know he is scheduling a consult for a brain scan and labeling you an alcohol abuser. keep your answers short and brief, no more than what is needed to answer the question asked. if you have any SCARS on your body, be prepared to explain how you fell off your bike as a kid and how its not from a surgery or broken bone. |
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I've gone through twice, once to enlist in 1993 (Richmond, VA), and once for a commission in 1999 (New Orleans, LA). I noticed a significant difference in the attitude of the doctors between those times, which I attribute to how badly the military needs people. In 1993, the docs were doing everything humanly possible to disqualify people. In 1999, they were much more willing to take a realistic look at you. That said, I would classify MEPS as the bottom of the barrel of non-wartime military experiences. Duck walking in underwear while in a formation of other dudes, strangely creepy doctors with huge knuckles, cross-eyed kids worried about passing the ASVAB, lots of talk about "I's gonna be a door gunner on a Huey," etc. As the above people said, keep your mouth shut and don't volunteer anything! I'm not saying to lie, but you don't have to point things out to them. Also, if you are signing a contract that day, don't let them pressure you into something you don't want. The MOS you pick will greatly define your military career. If you do well on the ASVAB and are going active duty, virtually every job will be open to you. If you are reserve or guard, it will be more restricted to what units are in your area. And if it isn't written explicity in your contract, it's not going to happen. Oh, and you are enlisting for 8 years. At least. Despite what they say, every enlistment is for an 8-year statutory period of service. Part of that might be active, part reserve, and part IRR, but you cannot get out for at least 8 years. After all that bad news, THANK YOU for volunteering to keep our great nation safe! 
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How would getting burned in the nuts affect you? Are they anti-enuchs or something ?
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When I went through MEPS one of the doctors was a female. She was checking the family jewels for ruptures. First guy thru the door bout had heart failure. She said "You haven't got anything I haven't seen before. And believe me I've seen bigger!" A lot of guys had red faces when they came out of her office. Doctors were checking for foot problems and had us stand up. They came by and slipped a ruler under the instep to check for flat feet. Well, they got to me and before I knew what was going on there were 4 MDs on their kness looking at my feet!! The lead Doc gets up and asked me if I was drafted or enlisted and I said enlisted. He said "Well son you have the flattest feet we have ever seen and if you were drafted we would flunk you right now. But since you enlisted for this s**t, we're going to pass you. If you have problems the Army will let you out on a medical and you'll get a partial disability." Needless to say 3 years later I got out when my enlistment was up and no partial disability either. Was Nov. 67 when I went thru MEPS. You'll remember MEPS the rest of your life!!! 
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