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Posted: 1/10/2003 1:01:19 PM EDT
An engineer dies and reports to the pearly gates. St.
Peter checks his dossier and says, "Ah, you're an
engineer -- you're in the wrong place."

So, the engineer reports to the gates of hell and is
let in. Pretty soon, the engineer gets dissatisfied
with the level of comfort in hell, and starts designing
and building improvements. After awhile, they've got
air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and
the engineer is a pretty popular guy.

One day, God calls Satan up on the telephone and says
with a sneer, "So, how's it going down there in hell?"

Satan replies, "Hey, things are going great.   We've
got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators,
and there's no telling what this engineer is going to
come up with next."

God replies, "What??? You've got an engineer? That's a
mistake -- he should never have gotten down there; send
him up here."

Satan says, "No way. I like having an engineer on the
staff, and I'm keeping him."

God says, "Send him back up here or I'll sue."

Satan laughs uproariously and answers, "Yeah, right.
And just where are YOU going to get a lawyer?"
Link Posted: 1/10/2003 1:06:50 PM EDT

Link Posted: 1/10/2003 1:22:19 PM EDT
A young couple were on their way to the Church to get married.  10 miles from the Church, they were in a horrible car accident and both were killed instantly.

As they were standing at the pearly gates, they were discussing whether to get married in Heaven.

St.Peter eventually came to the gates to let them in.

"St. Peter" the man asked, "Would it be possible for my fiance and I to get married in Heaven?"

"Just a minute", St. Peter said, "Let me go check".

Six days later, St. Peter arrived back at the gate.

"Well, I checked with everyone I could check with, and yes, you can indeed get married in Heaven".

Oh, thats great,said the couple, but what happens if things don't work out and we want to get a divorce?

At this, St. Peter flew off the handle.
"It took me six friggin' days to find a Priest in Heaven, how long do you think it would take me to find an Attorney?!!![;)]
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