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11/22/2025 2:36:19 PM EDT
[Last Edit: solid][Edited]
My wife and I have been separated nearly a year and she has filed for divorce. Are the online offerings a good idea ? Should I start with this and have my lawyer look it over after I get it or just have an attorney write it up? She has worked at the post office for 5 years or so and is enrolled in FERS , social security and maybe the thrift plan. Any help would be appreciated and meanwhile I'm waiting to hear back from my lawyer but really want to avoid the expense. I'll check back on this thread and thank you in advance! Solid
11/22/2025 4:23:45 PM EDT
[#1]
I’ll just say my divorce legal fees cost about 10% of the total settlement.

And it was money well spent.
ProTip: Never pick a fight with a tree planter. He swings a hoedad for 9 hours a day, carries 30-40 pounds of seedlings on his back, and has 12-14 friends just like him hiding out on the other side of the junk butt pile. They will fuck your shit up.
11/22/2025 6:31:25 PM EDT
[#2]
If there will be any dispute (over anything) in the process, use an experienced lawyer. It’s money well spent.
11/23/2025 1:01:50 AM EDT
[Last Edit: Aimless][Edited] [#3]
I used to just write to the company that had the pension and had them send me
their model qdro and copy it


there are special rules for .gov/post office. I did one a million years ago but don't remember the specifics
11/23/2025 6:22:57 AM EDT
[#4]
Here's the rub... if she just hit 5 years and you have been separated for 1, she wasn't vested in FERS while you were together. Not vested until 5 years. If I were you I would talk to your lawyer and negotiate this with her lawyer. Otherwise you might find yourself fighting it in front of a judge.

TSP is just an investment. It divisible.
11/23/2025 7:58:23 AM EDT
[#5]
Thanks for the input,my lawyer isn't a divorce lawyer but he responded yesterday and is going to recommend someone this week. I'll go back and check her start date today.
11/23/2025 8:02:01 AM EDT
[#6]
Quote History
Originally Posted By Aimless:
I used to just write to the company that had the pension and had them send me
their model qdro and copy it


there are special rules for .gov/post office. I did one a million years ago but don't remember the specifics
View Quote

Ideally this is what I'd like to do.
5/8/2026 6:36:46 PM EDT
[#7]
I appreciate everyone's advice. We are formally divorced and I was successful in getting exactly what I wanted which really wasn't a lot. Funny side note is I've worked hard on saving and keeping a great credit score. The upshot of that is i will be house shopping in a couple weeks much to the chagrin of my ex. Cheers bros, life is ok sometimes .
5/8/2026 8:57:05 PM EDT
[Last Edit: Aimless][Edited] [#8]
[Deleted]
5/9/2026 4:47:35 PM EDT
[#9]
Quote History
Originally Posted By solid:
I appreciate everyone's advice. We are formally divorced and I was successful in getting exactly what I wanted which really wasn't a lot. Funny side note is I've worked hard on saving and keeping a great credit score. The upshot of that is i will be house shopping in a couple weeks much to the chagrin of my ex. Cheers bros, life is ok sometimes .
View Quote

Getting out of the old house is pain and misery, but it’s offset by NEW HOUSE!  And it’s ALL YOURS. And you can do whatever you want.
ProTip: Never pick a fight with a tree planter. He swings a hoedad for 9 hours a day, carries 30-40 pounds of seedlings on his back, and has 12-14 friends just like him hiding out on the other side of the junk butt pile. They will fuck your shit up.
5/9/2026 4:48:10 PM EDT
[#10]
Quote History
Originally Posted By Aimless:
[Deleted]
View Quote

Dang. Mods getting modded

[img]/images/smilies/smiley_freak.gif[/img
ProTip: Never pick a fight with a tree planter. He swings a hoedad for 9 hours a day, carries 30-40 pounds of seedlings on his back, and has 12-14 friends just like him hiding out on the other side of the junk butt pile. They will fuck your shit up.
5/9/2026 6:29:03 PM EDT
[#11]
Quote History
Originally Posted By FredMan:

Dang. Mods getting modded

[url]/images/smilies/smiley_freak.gif[/img
View Quote View All Quotes
View All Quotes
Quote History
Originally Posted By FredMan:
Originally Posted By Aimless:
[Deleted]

Dang. Mods getting modded

[url]/images/smilies/smiley_freak.gif[/img

Hmm. Self deletion might be healthy on occasion.  Ive done it.
5/13/2026 4:52:54 PM EDT
[Last Edit: solid][Edited] [#12]
Quote History
Originally Posted By Aimless:
[Deleted]
View Quote


To be clear if you were wondering i declared every single thing in my filing while she actually attempted
" innocently " to hide assets and put it on paper. I played nice and pushed for full disclosure . Lost my health insurance which isn't great. The gut punch was she just walked out without saying why, packed her stuff and moved out 2 hours later. All good and moving on my flightless friend!

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