[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Alimony is indentured servitude (Page 1 of 7)
Posted: 9/23/2019 9:26:59 AM EDT
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Alimony is indentured servitude.
Typically you have to pay alimony for half the duration of the marriage. In my case, married for 30 years so that will be 15 years. I'm 57 now, so that will mean working until I am 72 to pay off the alimony. So let's face it, the rest of my life is fucked. No retirement. |
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It’s quite telling that you never hear feminists rail against the inherent sexism of alimony or insist that females be required to register for Selective Service. |
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Alimony is indentured servitude. Typically you have to pay alimony for half the duration of the marriage. In my case, married for 30 years so that will be 15 years. I'm 57 now, so that will mean working until I am 72 to pay off the alimony. So let's face it, the rest of my life is fucked. No retirement. |
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Strictly speaking, “alimony” is until the recipient dies or remarries. What you are talking about is “temporary spousal support.” Yea, I am this pedantic IRL 
And I agree that both are effectively indentured servitude. |
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And they rant about the gender imbalance in STEM careers but are silent about it in nursing or elementary/middle-school education. Quoted:
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It’s quite telling that you never hear feminists rail against the inherent sexism of alimony or insist that females be required to register for Selective Service. 
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I was talking to a young man yesterday who told me a story about his wife running off with their 3 little kids. She moved in with her trainer she met at the gym.
After the divorce she was awarded alimony and child support to the tune of $3400 a month and the guy only makes $4200 a month. He is trying to live on $800 a month and she just went to court again asking for more money 
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what happens if you say fuck it and live off the grid somewhere as a hermit and dont pay? can you be arrested for not paying alimony? He never pays. My sister has to waste time going to court to fight. Courts do nothing. He gets paid under the table and claims zero income 
If there's no children to care for, I say pull a Keyser Söze |
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Alimony is indentured servitude. Typically you have to pay alimony for half the duration of the marriage. In my case, married for 30 years so that will be 15 years. I'm 57 now, so that will mean working until I am 72 to pay off the alimony. So let's face it, the rest of my life is fucked. No retirement. |
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I know a guy who gave up his professional state licensing, necessary to work in his field, took a $100k+/yr pay cut and started delivering pizzas to support himself, just so they'd have to refigure his alimony. He already lived a smaller rent house that was paid off he got in the divorce when his ex got the main residence... that she could never pay off the mortgage without his money.
He said there was no way he was going to work his ass off in a professional field just so his ex could sit on her ass all day. If he was going to have to work the rest of HIS life, so was she. |
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When I finally divorced my wife she was pissed as her friends in her cult told her she would get alimony and child support. She got neither. The only child, a son aged 14 1/2, was on shared custody, one week with her, one week with me, so no money there. As for alimony, she had her own small business and if working it full time her income would have equaled or been slightly more than mine so no alimony. BTW At age 18 son moved in with me, he couldn't stand her. |
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Make better choices? In Florida, you would be paying for the rest of your life. I've never heard of "pay for half the length of the marriage." Maybe the OP is entirely at fault for the divorce. Maybe the wife decided the grass looked greener with Pablo the pool boy. It is incredibly presumptuous of you to post that, though. |
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I was talking to a young man yesterday who told me a story about his wife running off with their 3 little kids. She moved in with her trainer she met at the gym. After the divorce she was awarded alimony and child support to the tune of $3400 a month and the guy only makes $4200 a month. He is trying to live on $800 a month and she just went to court again asking for more money |
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Maybe a dumb question, but how is alimony or "T.S.S" calculated in your circumstance? Can it go up or down or is a number settled on and that's it until you are 72? Quoted:
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Make better choices? In Florida, you would be paying for the rest of your life. I've never heard of "pay for half the length of the marriage." The hope is when two people change they're still compatible. |
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I know a guy who gave up his professional state licensing, necessary to work in his field, took a $100k+/yr pay cut and started delivering pizzas to support himself, just so they'd have to refigure his alimony. He already lived a smaller rent house that was paid off he got in the divorce when his ex got the main residence... that she could never pay off the mortgage without his money. He said there was no way he was going to work his ass off in a professional field just so his ex could sit on her ass all day. If he was going to have to work the rest of HIS life, so was she. |
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That come from the sovereign citizens guide to family court? Quoted:
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Women are property and property cannot be recognized as a plaintiff in a trial, therefore alimony is unconstitutional. 
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Either I was smart or lucky, but I married a woman that has always made as much or more than me. Relationship dynamics are so much different when your wife isn't reaching into your wallet for everything. Good luck, OP. Did your ex work? |
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If you dont think people change over 15 to 20, you're naive. The hope is when two people change they're still compatible. Quoted:
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Make better choices? In Florida, you would be paying for the rest of your life. I've never heard of "pay for half the length of the marriage." The hope is when two people change they're still compatible. Plus it assumes that one person isn't just putting on a false face to win a spouse, then dropping the mask once married. BTDT with Wife 1.0. 
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That come from the sovereign citizens guide to family court? Quoted:
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Women are property and property cannot be recognized as a plaintiff in a trial, therefore alimony is unconstitutional. |
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The fact that they can set an amount that has to be paid indefinitely, or at least that’s my understanding, is BS. Buddy wanted to take another job that would reduce his income in the short run but offered more opportunity in the long run and said he couldn’t due to alimony. It can be a shitty deal for both involved. My wife has her masters, but she became a housewife shortly after graduation. We made a deal when we married to act as partners with the best interest of our family at the head of our decisions. One of those decisions was her foregoing monetary gain to raise the kids and keep the house while I worked to pay for things. If we were to divorce tomorrow should she be left high and dry to start her career over a decade later with no compensation from me? That doesn’t seem right to me. Should I be forced to work for my entire life to make up for it? Absolutely not. Should I be able to quit my job tomorrow and leave her high and dry out of spite? I don’t agree with that either. Should I have to work more than I currently do while she’s off galavanting on the town? Absolutely not. Should she be given pennies on the dollar while I’m out making bank, all the while her sacrifice is what allowed me to do so? We’ve made all of our decisions as a couple, with the families best interest at the heart of our decision making. How do you move forward from that as two singles with two different set of finances and priorities. That I do not know. I pray I never have to find out first hand. But the system I think is fair is not what I’ve seen implemented. Normally someone gets royally screwed. |
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in a lot of states, the judge won't fall for that, and state laws allow the judge to impute income to the payor based on the payor's ability to earn. Men try that all the time in child support cases and the court says "nice try, keep paying." |
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in a lot of states, the judge won't fall for that, and state laws allow the judge to impute income to the payor based on the payor's ability to earn. Men try that all the time in child support cases and the court says "nice try, keep paying." |
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Quoted:
I know a guy who gave up his professional state licensing, necessary to work in his field, took a $100k+/yr pay cut and started delivering pizzas to support himself, just so they'd have to refigure his alimony. He already lived a smaller rent house that was paid off he got in the divorce when his ex got the main residence... that she could never pay off the mortgage without his money. He said there was no way he was going to work his ass off in a professional field just so his ex could sit on her ass all day. If he was going to have to work the rest of HIS life, so was she. |
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The fact that they can set an amount that has to be paid indefinitely, or at least that’s my understanding, is BS. Buddy wanted to take another job that would reduce his income in the short run but offered more opportunity in the long run and said he couldn’t due to alimony. It can be a shitty deal for both involved. My wife has her masters, but she became a housewife shortly after graduation. We made a deal when we married to act as partners with the best interest of our family at the head of our decisions. One of those decisions was her foregoing monetary gain to raise the kids and keep the house while I worked to pay for things. If we were to divorce tomorrow should she be left high and dry to start her career over a decade later with no compensation from me? That doesn’t seem right to me. Should I be forced to work for my entire life to make up for it? Absolutely not. Should I be able to quit my job tomorrow and leave her high and dry out of spite? I don’t agree with that either. Should I have to work more than I currently do while she’s off galavanting on the town? Absolutely not. Should she be given pennies on the dollar while I’m out making bank, all the while her sacrifice is what allowed me to do so? We’ve made all of our decisions as a couple, with the families best interest at the heart of our decision making. How do you move forward from that as two singles with two different set of finances and priorities. That I do not know. I pray I never have to find out first hand. But the system I think is fair is not what I’ve seen implemented. Normally someone gets royally screwed. |