I have a 5.45 chambered in my ar15 and is now stuck in it.  Looks like its a still a live round... Any pointers on how to extract the ammo?

Cleaning rod down the barrel, tap.

This is usually a real pain.

Use a cleaning rod and push it out As long as you dont bang on it and make the case tighter you should be alright.

Pull the trigger
*
*don't actually do this.

You need to know if the bolt is locked (in battery) if it is a cleaning rod will not push it out.  try the bump method. if the action is open,  close it and (in a safe place) shoot it or use the bump method. If this does not work take it to someone who knows what they are doing to help. doug

I, for one, would not advise to shoot that round!

Here's my advise, take it for what it's worth:
Wear eye protection, please.

First off, engage the safety, drop the magazine.
Second, get that bolt back and locked in place!  Use the "mortar method" if you need to.
Third, with the barrel up and pointing in a safe direction, place a few patches in front of the bolt as padding.
Fourth, with the butt of the rifle on the ground, the ejection port away from you and the barrel pointed in a safe direction, drop a cleaning rod down the barrel.  The weight of the rod should force the cartridge out.  You may have to drop the rod several times, but do so at arms length with no part of your body (or head) over the barrel.  Do not "hammer" on the rod.
Fifth, dispose of the round.  Do not shoot the round.  You may pull the bullet (if you're a reloader, and can get it out) and reuse the components, but do not shoot the round.

If you don't feel confident about this, or you can't get the bolt back, take it to a smith or armorer.

I just broke down my rifle and took out the bolt carrier group all together... tried pushing the round out with the rod already but looks like all I did was pushing the bullet farther into the cartridge.... ARGH!

I was at a shoot recently and a guy had the same problem. The ammo in question actually came in a box marked 5.56mm. He tried a few hits on the forward assist before he realized what happened.

Long story short, after repeatedly slamming the upper with a rod in it against a post I suggested he go to a smith and save himself and others from what could only end up being a major accident.

Had that almost happen to me. I went out shooting with someone. I had a my 5.56 AR and my 5.45 AK. He loaded the 5.45 in a AR mag and right before he put the magazine in I checked. It really irritated me because my 5.45 came in a big russian tin clearly marked 5.45 and my 5.56 was in cardboard boxes in big large letters saying 5.56. I really don't understand how hard it is to double check what ammo you're loading and if it matches up to the caliber marked on the gun. Then again maybe Iits just me.

That's not necessarily a bad thing, it's not going to swell the case. I'd try a few shots of CLP down the barrel, let it soak over night then use a wooden dowel rod to push the round out. But that's just what I would try....

Update? if you still can't get it out though I'd vote gunsmith

Put a load of CLP down the barrel and let it sit for a little over a day already... Came home form fishing and said to myself lets try it again.  As I was pushing the round out I was picturing my hands being blown off so I said EF that! I mean i wanna be a man and do it myself but I gots to keep my fingers dude! Gunsmith where ought thou?!?!? Anybody know any gunsmiths in the Houston TX area and about how much would this run

Update... today I flipped the upper upside down to let all the CLP leak out and saw gunpowder in the oil... Does that mean the live round is now "not-live"? Does that mean I can now tap it out with a wooden dowel and a hammer??? I read somewhere that once water or lub oil gets behind the bullet, the round will not fire.... I dont want to base my actions on a "I read somewhere..."

This website is "somewhere" isn't it?
That said, ANY local 'smith should be able to make it right in minutes, *(probably while you wait). I may be corn-fused here, but If you have the BCG out, and you are "tapping" from the bullet end, what makes you think it's gonna go "boom"?? The OTHER end of the bullet is the part that makes it go off, no? Or am I missing something?
Mike B