This is something a member i forget who posted awile back i saved it cause i thought it was hilarious
We bought a house cheap once. One of the reasons it was cheap was probably because it was built on some kind of Scorpion Heaven and we couldn't even get an exterminator to go underneath and try to kill them off. So, we got used to seeing them everywhere inside the house.
One morning I woke up, put on my robe, fetched my first cup of coffee and sat down in front of the TV to catch up on the early news and felt an itch.... uh... how shall we say, "between my legs." Being an average guy, I scratched. I thought I felt the itch move. I pulled my robe open and looked down to see one crawling from testicle A to testicle B.
The official ARFCOM adrenaline dump followed. I slapped hard and fast, and yes it hurt, but not as bad as that damn bug would have.