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Posted: 3/10/2001 4:45:32 PM EDT
Guns laws...

Very controversial subject. The Anti's insist that we will all drop dead from "gunviolence" without "gunlaws". Personally, I believe that the Second says we shouldn't have them, cause that would be infringement. But...OK...I can think of some laws to replace the ones we have now.


No handgun shall cave a capacity over 150 rounds, or have over 9 barrels. Handguns must not be under a minimum size, .5 inches long, not over a lenth of 35 inches. Posession of a gun not meeting these descriptions shall be considered a Felony.

No rifle shall have a barrel under two inches long, nor over 80. The nuber of barrels shall not exceed 20, miniguns excluded. The overall lenght of such a weapon shall be at least 4 inches long.
No rifle or ammunition feeding device for such shall exceed 500 rounds in capacity, with exceptions for belt fed weapons.
These weapons must pass a drop test, requiring them not to fire more than 5 times when dropped from a height of two inches onto a pillow.
Also, A rifle shall not have more flashiders attached than the number of barrels, and shall not have more than twice as many pistolgrips than the hands of the user.
No more than 17 bayonnets shall be attached to the weapon at any one time.
There is a limit on the number of collapsible or folding stocks any one rifle may have, namely, two, for public safety reasons. Simutaneous multi-operator weapons excluded.
No weapon which fires in the fully automatic mode shall fire at a rate of 54,000 rpm. per barrel.
No shotgun shall have a barrel length of less than two inches, nor shall it fire in the fully automatic mode on more than 18 of the barrels under the 21 barrel limit.
The overall lenght of such a weapon shall be at least 4 inches long.
All weapons with silercers or sound supressors must reduce the sound below the 90 decibel limit to be legal, otherwise they will be considered a public health hazard.

All weapons have a caliber width limit of no more than 80mm, or a permit will be required. SEE REGISTRATION

All new weapons wich utilize new tachnology shall be reviewed, and thus cause these lwas to be revised, so that a 1000-shot Laser pistol, for example, would be legal under these laws.

All weapons MUST be registered with God himself. Tell him about 'em, and not another soul unless you want to. All 80mm weapons must be registered in the same way, but you WILL have to ask God, "God, can I really afford an 85mm Recoiless cannon?" If he says yes, you are home free.

An insta-check will be imposed on all gun buyers. If it turns out you are not a felon, or mentally retarded or dangerous, check and see if you have enough money for the gun. Fast!

And finally, all older gunlaws still apply to: Representatives in the House and Senate who voted for the previous laws,
People named Clinton, Brady, O'Donnell or Reno,
and their bodyguards, too.

Now, wouldn't that make you feel safer? [:D]
Link Posted: 3/10/2001 4:51:37 PM EDT
[#1]
NO Comment!!!!!!
Link Posted: 3/10/2001 4:57:39 PM EDT
[#2]
can i get some of what you have been smoking? ;)
Link Posted: 3/10/2001 8:00:17 PM EDT
[#3]
Did nobody think this was funny, or am I just being regarded as a troll, before they read what i have to say? I am NOT a Troll. Read this post, NOW! [:D]
Link Posted: 3/10/2001 8:10:30 PM EDT
[#4]
Jug - I thought the post was choice!  LOL

Tate  [:)]
Link Posted: 3/10/2001 8:49:29 PM EDT
[#5]
That is the funniest thing I've read in a while...If only Bush would stick out his neck for that like he is for the tax cut...
Link Posted: 3/10/2001 9:24:24 PM EDT
[#6]
Oh, BABY!  Tell me, oh tell me, where do I sign!

FFZ
Link Posted: 3/10/2001 9:34:09 PM EDT
[#7]
so would my 3 inch 28 barrel minigun be preban?
Link Posted: 3/10/2001 9:52:20 PM EDT
[#8]
Quoted:
so would my 3 inch 28 barrel minigun be preban?
View Quote


Yep, I'm sorry matt, but dangerous gun suchas the one you just described have too many evil features to be manufactured nowadays. Just about anything else, as you can see, falls under fair game under these reasonable restrictions [:D]

I had fun writing this 'un, I was seething last night about not having a flash hider so my AR could be shot at dusk. I thought "Gun laws? They want gun laws? FINE! I'll give 'em gun laws!"

I wish GDubya would sign in this peice of legislation, too, with a 500 year expiration date(heck, all the other numbers are ridiculous, why not the expiration date?).

Enjoy [:)]
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