I'll try...........

I went to the doctor today and said "Hey, Doc I need some help"

"What's the problem?", he inquired.

"Well it started yesterday morning when I woke up and gave my wife a good morning bang, then I went to the office and got a BJ from a total stranger while riding up the elevator.  At lunch I gave my secretary the daily screwing like we have been doing for 2 years.  I got home early and caught the housekeeper on all fours scrubbing the floor so I got in behind her like she likes it (me too!) and rode her real hard for an hour.  My wife got home around 9:00 and we screwed until about midnight".

"So..what's the problem?", the Doc asked.

"It hurts when I jerk off!"

[beer]