Well, lets hear em.

Me, got my arse kicked good after a night of bacon wrapped hot dogs dos xx's watered down beer, tequila poppers in TiaJuana by 4 shytheads.

Damage: conucssion, broken nose, scrapes and lacerations.

ARSwami

Well,there was one time...this girl.....and after I mentioned that bit about her sister, she just went bonkers...I hurt all over when I woke up, but still had a smile on my face and my charming sense of humor.  

Tri-Met Portland, OR Bus Mall.
3:30 AM
16 Years old.

Jeez, lets see... where I work I fight someone almost nightly...

My favorite fight?  When I figured out how to use someones momentum against them... I was fighting with some drunk 18yr old hippy kid, he was struggling and pushed off the wall I had him pinned on, I turned and threw and that little sumbitch flew across the room, he hit the ceiling and smashed into a desk...  
I was laughing so hard that I almost couldn't get the little shyte into cuffs.  Strange thing is my SGT. saw the whole thing and the only thing he could say was "just don't make him bleed, then you have to take him to the ER"

I love my job.

mmmmmmm....the first rule of fight club is ......no thats not right lets see......the first rule of project mayhem......mmmm thats not right either...


Oh yeah when I was in J.R. High I got beat up by a 17yr punk that fucked me up pretty bad....the funny thing is is now Im 6inches taller and a lot bigger than him. he dosnt want to fight again for some reason

The last day of freshman year at Channelview High School.  It was one of those wrong place/wrong time scenarios.  A friend and I were walking home from school because the busses weren't going to run for another three hours, and got jumped by a group of aproximately 12 black guys.  They started by throwing 20 oz. glass soda bottles, so I'm lucky I only came out with multiple concussions, bruises, knots on my head, a size 14 nike shaped bruise on my chest, a few stitches and a pair of broken glasses, which they knoced off my head when they hit me from behind.  My friend got off with just a bruise when they ran past him after they stomped on me.  It's the only fight I've ever lost, but I really don't look at it as a fight.  More of a straight up ass whipping.

What always struck me as odd, was I went to a magnet school in HISD that was in a very bad neighborhood known as South Park.  It's home of such Gangster Rap luminaries as Ghetto Boys member Scarface and The Southpark Mexican.  Anyway, I never had a single problem with any of the kids in that school, except for a drive by super soaker incident.  But I was forced to go back to my home school in Channelview when I failed a class, and I got the shit beat out of me.

Another odd twist is that the same friend with me my freshman year ended up going back to the magnet school with me during his Junior year and he got the crap beat out of him heading to the Metro bus stop right after the Rodney King verdict.  He got mad at me for having to stay behind and talk to a teacher before leaving, and decided he could go off on his own.  I guess he didn't realize that they wouldn't mess with me at 6'3" 260lbs and long black hair and goatee (I've been shaving since 7th grade), but would have no problems with him at 5'10" and 120lbs soaking wet.  His parents actually blamed me for it.

Anyway, a few of the guys who beat me up are dead now and a few have been sent to prison for various felony offenses.  Karma is a bitch.

God Bless Texas

Plieku, Viet Nam 1970. A couple of guys from my company went to the Enlisted Men's Club, got drunk and started trouble. Two M.P.s show up and our guys run back to our area with the P.s after them. We bunch up and tell the P.s they can't have them.  The P.s leave and we're feeling badass.  M.P.s come back with a LOT of help, big fight and the P.s take our two criminals away and leave the rest of us with a lot bumps on our bodies from top to bottom.They knew how to use those clubs they carried and even if we would have considered using them, our rifles were locked up. Probably a good thing. Funny thing was that some of these M.P.s were guys we worked with every day and were friends with. I won't say that drinking MAKES you do stupid things but it sure LETS you do stupid things.

US Army base in Vicenza Italy, 1975-1977, Mr. Choe's Tae Kwon Do class. I was a tall, skinny, long-haired 17-yr-old Sgt's son, an Army brat, dependent, whatever you want to call us, studying martial arts with a guy who used to be a personal bodyguard to Pr Park of S Korea, and one of the baddest men on the planet. His whole family were famous Korean TKD fighters. The class was full of hard 509th Airborne and other soldiers who were generally bigger, faster, and very good, and Mr Choe made me free fight 'em all the time. Oh, did I mention that I'm heavily nearsighted and this was before cheap contacts, so I had to fight with my glasses off. I got my ass kicked a lot, but they all kinda run together and none sticks out. [BD]

Funny, I haven't lost a fight since, and there have only been two.

I got my nose bitten off by a Saigon WHORE!

MP story (lots of fights, but this was the best story)

One night when my guard unit was on active duty for 9 months at a base area in germany, another guard unit came in for two weeks to train with us on LE stuff.
They are all out one night to set up drunk point, their first night out.
It happened to be a friday payday.
There was a big fight at the club, we all showed up at the same time (all 5 of us on shift, all 20 of them in vans)
No more fight at the club, and no more trouble at that club or anywhere at any of the kasernes or in town....news travels fast  ;-)

I've been in a few crazy barroom brawls, and a fight that could possibly be considered a riot since it was twenty or so of them on seven of us. Almost always been outnumbered, but have been lucky enough to have gotten through with only a few bumps and bruises. I can't say the same for the people on the other side.

I learned early growing up as a kid in the hardcore/punk scene in a fairly small town, to always pack some kind of equalizer. Almost every fight I've been in, me or me and my friends have been outnumbered. Strange how that works.

I have to say, it's a pretty good feeling when somebody thinks they're going to gang up on you and stomp you into the ground, and instead they come out the ones bloody.

Anyway, I try to steer clear of those situations anymore. Jail just doesn't sound like much fun to me.

edited because I can

i hurt somebody's feelings once.

heh.

four out of state deer hunters and me. was not pretty. (for them). ended up getting a whole can of pepper gas sprayed in my face by the police. cost $$$$$

A few Jose Quervo's and everyone thought they were tough. All hell broke loose. Filthiest, dirtiest brawl I ever seen that lasted for at least 30 min. Many broken bones and stiches. Approximately 40 to 1 odds but we finally won. The toughest damn Mexican any of us ever run across then and since but we wore him down.

Come on McUZI, elaborate!!
Jesus, you and Treetop should get together.[;)]

Lets see must be the time I got jumped by three guys in high school. First one started the fight(had whipped him once before) and then two others joined in. Well I knocked the first one cold. The second one I got a few good licks in on and he got one or two on me. He kinda just blended in with the crowd after I hit him the last time(I knew I hurt him). The third guy was quick I never could catch him. He ran too damn fast. It just goes to show stupid people never wise up. I had whipped the first guy two or three times before and he just never would give up.

In college. Got a blackeye, bruised rib, puffy lower lip and a concussion....don't ask about the other guy....

All of them.

Got my ass kicked by a bunch of chicks.
Long story about a lesbian bar.
Here is what I looked like after.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
[img]http://www.munsters.com/hermanM.gif[/img]



Friend of mine got turned down by a french whore, I saw it happen. Now thats an ass whuppin

At work on alcohol.Big guy,I was puting bumps all over his face.....Tell I ducked into a upper cut.Funny part was over a girl that didn't want either one of us.

My sister, damn she can pull hair.

Diego Garcia on the queens birthday.. Brits have no sense of humor about the queen [:P]

Jr. year in High School-fought a guy inch for inch,pound for pound my eaqual,problem was that he had about 8 friends w/him.Had plenty of oppurtunity to bash his head into the wall,sink,etc. but figured that fighting 1 was better than fighting 9.Came out the worse for ware,but oh well.                                                                                                                                           Was jumped by 7-8 guys at a party once,my stepdad taught me to work 1 and leave my mark on him so they wouldn't get any bragging rights on me.Had about 6 eggs on my head from beer bottles,and my face looked like the elephant man.                                                                                            Been in a few barroom fights that looked like scenes from a movie-bottles,bodies,and bar stools flying,Gawd I miss the old days when you could fight w/o worrying about being shot.

1973.  A dyke bar in Cedar Springs area of Dallas, (aka Homo Heights).

A motorcycle riding drinking buddy and I got the extremely dumb idea to have a few at this side street joint.  Turns out we're the only hard dicks in the place.

After a few beers we notice a Pearl Beer sign over the bar.  A really nice Pearl Beer sign.  Neon, about five feet long and made like a guitar.  We had to have that sign.

Sooo...we casually remove the sign from the wall and head for the door.

At this point all hell breaks loose.  I guess we were not appreciated as much as we thought.  We still had to have that sign.

So there's about twenty or so agitated females whipping the sh!t out of us and we won't give up the sign.

We got all the way to the motors, along with our entourage, before we fully realized that sign was not going to fit in the saddlebags or anywhere else for that matter.

Regretfully and with what skin as we had left on our heads we left that d@mn sign with its original owners.

I hurt for two weeks when I was young enough to recover from things like that.

It was funny then and it's still funny now.

Does a gunfight with a guy using an M1 Garand count?

Okinawa City, Okinawa, Japan, 1992. A buddy and I were in the downstairs of a bar where a lotta Marines hung out because a lotta Japanese girls who wanted to meet Marines hung out there. I was putting the mack on this sweet little Asian delight when I noticed a Jarhead in the middle of the dance floor fighting two American guys with long hair, and a third approaching him from behind with hands raised.

I excused myself and kamikazed out onto the dancefloor and suckerpunched the third guy as hard as I could in the ear, leaving the odds at two on two, right? No.

It turned out that there were seven of them, including this one BIG sailor, against four of us. The only mistake we made was winning the fight. The guy whose cheek I split open was an Air Force Captain. That cost me an extra six months on frickin' Oki.

My mother in law actually got the blood stains out of the longsleeved dress shirt I was wearing that night when the OSI detective mailed it back to me almost a year after the brawl. And I was found not guilty at the NJP!

I had the shit beat out of me by a bunch of local gangbangers when I was a pre-teenager. The came from behind and left me there bruised and bloodied.

Unfortunately, I hung out with these guys when I was that age. This is the number one reason not to hang out with gangs.

Most of them are in jail now for various reasons including Robbery, Arson, and a slew of Weapons Charges.

I have never been in a bad fight, I have enjoyed them all..[:D]

Also like to add I was arrested once for getting into a fight with another punk. Actually we were both arrested. The Police wrote it up and released us to our parents. Fortunately, no charges were filed.