98.6 and upright patrol services
Toy Cop International (Or TCI)
Tackleberry Protection Services (Now, that explains TPS reports and cover sheets)
Mall Ninja Inc. ("Wanna see me kick some ass"? -Mall Guard on Terminator)
Economy Pseudo-Police (Everyone loves anything economical)
The Brute Squad (Who says The Princess Bride didn't impact our lives?)
Community Responsive Alert Security Hogs (CRASH for the truly high speed)
Renta Cop Inc. "Why own a cop when you can rent one cheap"?
Thugs Alliance Sekurity Korps (TASK.. Wooot! Tacti-cool!)
Security Enforcement Armed Response Services (SEARS, roebuck ain't got anything on THIS!)
MAY Patrol (Then again, we may not... it all depends, which, we're now wearing)
Unsworn Spastic Patrol (USP, and still no royalties to HK)
SMASH (Security Men Are Such Hacks)
COPS "Civilian Oppressive Punk Squad"
And before ya get mad at me, all of these are posted in jest!