YOU KNOW YOU ARE FROM SOUTH CAROLINA WHEN
- Hey, that's not funny.
Your idea of a traffic jam is 10 cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway near Whitmire.
- The other day when I was leaving Clinton to head to Prosperity (old joke, I know) I was delayed a good two minutes by a traffic jam just like that. I complained about it to my wife for the next three days.
“Vacation” means going to the family reunion.
- Got to get away some how. Plus, they're usually in places with cheap motel rooms unlike the beach or Orlando or Gatlinburg. For that matter, most of us from South Carolina have never actually stayed in Mytle Beach. It's much cheaper to rent a room in a slum to either the north or south of the beach. We let the Canadians pay for those "high-dollar" rooms.
You’ve seen all the big bands 10 years after they were popular.
- The band Kansas played last spring here at a city festival. They rocked.
You measure distance in minutes.
- I live about 10 minutes from Spartanburg and 25 from Greenville.
You know several people who have hit a deer.
- And, served them for dinner.
Your school classes were canceled because of cold.
- You can't expect students to learn when the classroom is below 65.
Your school classes were canceled because of heat.
- Ditto except w/ above 100. What's your point?
You’ve ever had to switch from “heat” to “A/C” in the same day.
- More than 10 days per year. I think it's a factor of the lack of insulation in our homes, and our refusal to let the weather dictate to us what appropriate clothing is.
You think ethanol makes your truck “run a lot better.”
- Don't know, my truck doesn't run to try it.
Stores don’t have shopping carts; they have buggies.
- Bi-Lo's and Wally-Mart's have buggies. What's your point?
You see a car running in the parking lot at the store with no one in it no matter what time of the year.
- It's better for the engine to leave it running than to keep stopping and restarting it. Plus, some people just don't know if their car is going to start back if they do stop the engine.
You use “fix” as a verb. Example: I am fixing to fix dinner.
- And, do it 5 times per converstation without realizing it.
All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain,or animal (including pesky insects!).
- The Bubba festival wasn't named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, or animal. Or, was it?
You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked. (And your car as well!)
- Because we expect the criminals to have some shame. If we see them, they won't hurt us.
You carry jumper cables in your car ...for your OWN car.
- Always prepared, what's your point? You never know when your 15 year old battery is going to decide to prematurely die.
You only own four spices: salt, pepper, ketchup, and Tabasco.
- Maybe salt should be included twice. We use lots of that even on vegetables.
You think everyone from a bigger city has an accent.
- They do.
The local papers cover national and international news on one page but require 6 pages for sports.
- 6 pages for national sports and another 6 for local high school football.
You find 90 degrees F “a little warm.”
- It's a good chance to go cut the grass w/o sweating too much.