User Panel
Posted: 4/17/2006 7:40:56 PM EDT
If you had the man power and means, would you go for world domination? Or would you just go for a country or 2?
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nah... too many idiots in the world. i'd be content to have an inpenetrable country
ETA: i'd also spell "maybe" right in my poll, because i would be a spelling nazi dictator |
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Oh but as a WORLD leader you could purge the earth of Idiots by removing the tags and warning labels from household items!! Muhahahahahahh! |
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That's always been my life goal. Anybody know some colleges that offer degrees in World Domination?
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apparently Yale |
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Two thirds of the real estate is in one shithole country or another. Who needs the headaches?
"I want to be King of every shithole country in the world". Huh? Huh?? I don't think so. I'd just grab Canada and Mexico, and enjoy all the raw material and cheap labor. And I'd build a FUCKING WALL at the southern end of Mexico!!! |
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Reminds me of a book a friend had in College - "Word Power Made Easy" When I first glanced at it on his bookshelf I honestly thought it said "WORLD Power Made Easy" Thanks for the memory! |
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If someone made that into a real t-shirt i would buy 3 of them |
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If I had the men and material, I'd probably go for North America and possibly Europe.
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N_T, you're alright. And I would go for world domination....but only if I had the support of an ARMY OF SEA MONKEYS! |
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Never get involved in a land war in Asia... |
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I'd take a country or two, and at least one of those countries would be thereafter known as Pieland.
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I'd conquer all the nice parts of the world. North America, Europe, Russia, Australia, New Zealand, Japan. The Middle East and parts of Africa would glow in the dark and have glass craters visible from orbit. South America, Asia, the rest of Africa, and all those little island nations nobody really cares about would live in fear of my empire and its Legions of Terror.
China would get a severe bitch-slapping but be left in place as a major power (though obviously it couldn't begin to compare to my empire) so that I have someone I can scapegoat or use as a threat against our country as an excuse for maintaining massive military force. Because of the large nations and populations under my control, the empire would prosper financially. The rest of the world would sell us raw materials for low, low prices. What we didn't use for ourselves would be turned into quality products and sold back to them at a profit for us. And if they didn't like that arrangement, well, fuck 'em. The people in the empire would be happy, for the most part. They'd have all the same rights that are included in the US Bill of Rights, and the imperial equivelent to the second amendment would include any and all weapons, excluding biological weapons and lethal chemical weapons. Nukes would be legal, because, well, who the fuck would be able to buy one anyway? Citizens could travel freely and unless they specifically are suspected of illegal activity, no surveillance will be made of their comings and goings, unlike travel today. No passport required to go anywhere in the empire. Laws would be enforced. Rapists, murderers, and child molestors would be castrated with belt sanders, placed in forced labor camps for a year, then forced to dig their own graves, climb in, and eat a bullet. Or fed into wood chippers and sold as fertilizer, whichever. Illegal immigrants would be deported ONCE. If they get caught a second time, they get air dropped over the radioactive Arabian Glass Desert, tenth wonder of the world. And they only get parachutes if they pay us with legally obtained money. As time passed, the empire would be forged into a more democratic society, with the powers of the emperor being reduced upon my death or abdication of the throne. Hopefully, the empire would flourish much the same way the US did once I was gone. Except I'd make sure we stamped out communist/socialist/liberal thinking right off the bat and made sure kids learned in school why leftist thinking is evil. Edit: I would also make it where any member state (formerly nations) could decide whether or not the attractive women had to go nude in public, weather permitting. Hey, it had to be said. |
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I like! But I would leave Israel.. just incase they realy ARE the chosen ones. |
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Funny, the city council here is discussing the installation of city-wide, taxpayer funded "free" Wi-Fi. It's all making sense now... |
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Hello, kettle. You're black. |
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Dude, I want in. |
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World domination. That way I won't have to waste time fighting off the "do-gooders" if I was to just grab a couple countries for their oil.
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Maybe you could even spell your name correctly (Tannerite) and go for broke and spell Impenetrable right too! |
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Any liberal-arts college can do it. Especially if they offer journalism. |
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I can't believe that I just read all 100 super villain tips
But I deffinatly want to be part of your empire swindle. Maybe Arfcom team members could be given small countrys and sates? We could even host PR matches and MG shoots in the middle east if you catch my drift...might be better for the planet in the long run rather than nuking them. |
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Ironically, nearly every college-educated dictator in the world took liberal arts instead of history, economics, math, etc. The only exception I can think of is Napoleon. Coincidence? I think not.
I'm leaving Israel alone. And after nuking the rest of the Middle East and the less desirable parts of Africa, they should be thanking me.
I could find a place for you as a warlord and regional governor. I haven't picked anyone to be in charge of Australia once it's been annexed, so if you do well you'll get the job. Send me a Bushmaster AR-15 with 16" barrel and you're in. |
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Its great to find someone who has a plan. Do you ever get out of the house, Brentwal? and if you do...do you ever go past the theater? |
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Having read a good deal of utopian Sci Fi, I have come to the conclusion that the best evidence that the government is NOT trying to enslave us is... they have outlawed Soma. (Marijuana to you.) |
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Let's think up some ideas of some of the laws we will have in our 'super-country.'
1) Any lawyer who loses a lawsuit has to share 1/3 of the cost of the countersuit. Hey, if they get 1/3 of the judgement, then sharing the cost of the loss makes sense, doesn't it? 2) Ditto lawmakers: if their bill fails, they must reimburse the country for the many thousands or even millions of dollars they've spent failing. 3) If they pass a law and it has negative consequences (like gun control causing crime), their children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren will be sold into slavery. 4) Drunks and careless drivers must be made to alter their vehicles so that they can only be operated from a spot in front of the front bumper, and their asses must be no more than 24 inches from the road. 5) All prison sentences must be carried out the same way, in a facility that combines the worst aspects of a Turkish prison with a gladiator training ring. Prisoners have only two rights: the first is the right to drink potable water in adequate quantities to sustain life. They must perform manual labor to keep the prison running (laundry, farming, etc.) or they will not eat. The second right is the right to suicide. A self-service guillotine will be furnished to all prisoners who have served 1/10th of their sentences. any one else wanna join in? |
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I would choose not to try something that has been done repeatedly throughout history and has consistantly proved to be impossible.
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yeah ill second that, take the developed parts of the world that can be adjusted, a cheap labor source or two and wipe the rest clean... africa, southeast asia, middle east, parts of south america get nuked from orbit repeatedly |
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Nah, you can't get nuke every turd world shit hole. Gotta leave some to buy your exports and sell you cheap raw materials for your own production. I'm only glassing the parts that are dangerous or have personally pissed me off. For instance, France will be left intact but most of the population will be deported to the moon as slave labor for my lunar colonies. Once they complete the colonies, they will not be allowed to live there. They'll be deported to Mars to start all over again. Eventually, I'll have either run out of Frenchies or built colonies/military bases everywhere feasible in the solar system. If the latter occurs before the former, the remaining French will be launched into the sun. Some might think I'm being merciful to have them quickly vaporized by the sun rather than launching them into deep space to slowly waste away in the void, but I'm not. The reason I'm not launching them into deep space is because, on the so-extremely-unlikely-it-isn't-even-quantifiable odds that intelligent life comes across their ship/s, I really don't want the French to be the first people aliens come into contact with. They might decide to mercy-kill the whole planet, and frankly, I don't want that. When the aliens come and start blowing up national monuments around the world, everybody's going to come bitching to me. |
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I'd voted "Hell Yeah"
Although, it should be noted after I have finished my conquest of the world there may only be a handfull of nations left. My theory is, if they have resources you need, take em over and occupy them. If they are in your way and have no practical use(or resources) carpet bomb the area until there is nothing left. I know of 2 areas that would be wipe off the map. France and The Peoples Republik of Kalifornia. I have no use for liberals or hairy women and weak men. Although the illegals will make nice fodder. The Middle East would be subjecated for oil production. Most of Europe and Japan would be assumalted into the emipre and the people's made citizens.(Need people to rule over) Not sure what I'd do with Canada, maybe just target practice before the real conquest begins. |
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Guys if I had the power a lot of shit would change. Oh shit, there is way too much white lent on my black sweater.
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I'd abolish hunger by inventing thin easily distributed green crackers made from processed dead people. I'd call it something cool, like Mana, Patriot wafers, or the bread of humanity or soymeat greens or something.
Then in parts of my country where they breed too quickly, I'd start the right of "carnival" where anytime someone gets to the age of 30 they go into this big twirly levitation machine and gets "reincarnated" (basically killed and turned into Patriot Wafers). This would be enforced with strick propaganda and many layers of security. A security person would be called a "sandman". I'd have in reserve, a bio-strain weapon that would turn all my subjects, except for a select few into noctural mutants. That way if they turn on me, they'd become freak pack animals that I can shoot all night long from my high rise tower safely for fun, pleasure and practice. I'd be a god. I'd be a naughty, naughty god. |
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Just because you rule the world doesn't mean you have to be evil...
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What about the Mormons? You never know! |
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I'll wait until you have control, then we'll talk... |
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LOL!! |
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i will let you know in a few more years when my preparations are complete.
i am having trouble getting the ill tempered sea bass to aim the laser beams properly. |
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Ruling the entire world would be an administrative nightmare. No thank you. I don't even want to be friggin' MAYOR, much less absolute ruler of the entire planet. |
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You would be one of the ones I think could do it... |
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