What would happen if I got caught sneaking into Mexico?

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[ARCHIVED THREAD] - What would happen if I got caught sneaking into Mexico?

Posted: 3/30/2006 2:51:02 PM EDT

Would I get amnesty after awhile?

Or a free ride and a bus ride home?

Posted: 3/30/2006 2:51:47 PM EDT

[#1]

I am sure it would not work out for you. But, give it a try and give us a full report!

Posted: 3/30/2006 2:51:56 PM EDT

[#2]

You'd get robbed, and maybe kidnapped and held for ransom.

Why? You planning a vacation?

Posted: 3/30/2006 2:52:09 PM EDT

[#3]

DEATH, DEATH, DEATH!

you'd probably get shot by the drug gangs that control the border areas. or at least be kidnapped for ransom

Posted: 3/30/2006 2:52:21 PM EDT

[#4]

You'd get tossed into a third world style prison, not fed, and probably regularly beaten. Washington Times did a nice article on how Mexico deals with their illegals.

Posted: 3/30/2006 2:52:38 PM EDT

[#5]

They force you to make tortillias.

Posted: 3/30/2006 2:54:40 PM EDT

[#6]

they would make you do all the work the Mexicans are smart enough to do....

Posted: 3/30/2006 2:55:01 PM EDT

[#7]

Mugged by the policia, then ransomed or shot by the assorted cartels.

Posted: 3/30/2006 2:57:29 PM EDT

[#8]

Now I'm not talking about expired Visas or anything. I'd be soggy.

Would their ATMs offer English? Or could I navigate my way by Spanish/English road signs?

Posted: 3/30/2006 2:59:58 PM EDT

[#9]

Quoted:
Now I'm not talking about expired Visas or anything. I'd be soggy.

Would their ATMs offer English? Or could I navigate my way by Spanish/English road signs?

well, if they don't, you could always sue.

Posted: 3/30/2006 3:04:18 PM EDT

[#10]

Hogged tied and butt fucked by the lonely other American in the jail cell

Posted: 3/30/2006 3:05:58 PM EDT

[#11]

Quoted:
Now I'm not talking about expired Visas or anything. I'd be soggy.

Would their ATMs offer English? Or could I navigate my way by Spanish/English road signs?

You would be arrested by the Mexican Federal Police, charged with a felony and shoved in some dirthole, rat infested prison. Until you are able to bribe your way out.

Wonderful country, Mexico.

BC

Posted: 3/30/2006 3:09:10 PM EDT

[#12]

You'd end up the main ingredient in a burrito!

Posted: 3/30/2006 3:11:23 PM EDT

[#13]

I have done it at the Nogales crossing , i did not feel like waiting in line so me and 3 buddies jumped the fence , a mexican cop saw us , and chased us , we got away , we thought , 20 min. later , he found us in a bar with 4 of his "amigos" , and they took us into the alley , and started punching us with their sticks , and took 20 bucks off me , we had it comming , as that is the price you pay for fuking around

Posted: 3/30/2006 3:13:07 PM EDT

[#14]

Quoted:
I have done it at the Nogales crossing , i did not feel like waiting in line so me and 3 buddies jumped the fence , a mexican cop saw us , and chased us , we got away , we thought , 20 min. later , he found us in a bar with 4 of his "amigos" , and they took us into the alley , and started punching us with their sticks , and took 20 bucks off me , we had it comming , as that is the price you pay for fuking around

He could have just asked for $20, man what a jerk!

Posted: 3/30/2006 3:16:20 PM EDT

[#15]

Quoted:
I have done it at the Nogales crossing , i did not feel like waiting in line so me and 3 buddies jumped the fence , a mexican cop saw us , and chased us , we got away , we thought , 20 min. later , he found us in a bar with 4 of his "amigos" , and they took us into the alley , and started punching us with their sticks , and took 20 bucks off me , we had it comming , as that is the price you pay for fuking around

Good thing you weren't armed or even in possession of ammo. I know a guy in the Panhandle who had a Barrett and went to south Texas to shoot it from time to time. Once he went to Mexico (without the Barrett!) and when he got home and was cleaning out the car some .50 cal ammo rolled out from under the seat. Said he almost puked. That's enough for a long period of contemplation in the company of some types you won't find listed in the social register.

Posted: 3/30/2006 3:19:31 PM EDT

[#16]

Seems mexico like to "dish it out" but cant take it.

Posted: 3/30/2006 3:21:02 PM EDT

[#17]

you would be treated as a guest and could do the jobs that mexicans wont do

mexicans just LOVE us americans

Posted: 3/30/2006 3:21:07 PM EDT

[#18]

ask the Guatemalans

Posted: 3/30/2006 3:25:35 PM EDT

[#19]

Why would anyone want to go to mexico, anyhoo?

Posted: 3/30/2006 3:25:43 PM EDT

[#20]

I think they lock you in jail.

Posted: 3/30/2006 3:29:32 PM EDT

[#21]

Probably not much, they'd just figure you were out of drugs and on a resupply trip... MournSword

Posted: 3/30/2006 3:35:09 PM EDT

[#22]

Quoted:
I think they lock you in jail.

After they attempt to take all of your money by hoping you will bribe them off.

Then they beat you because you only have $20.00.

When you ask to make a phone call they suddenly only speak Spanish and you fvcked.

In jail you find out that if you can wire enough money down there they will let you go. Problem is trying to get around the political BS between the various guards and prisoners who are all on the take somehow.

Then, after somehow getting money down to pay, the fine goes up. By the grace of God you do find a way to pay the fine they drop you in the middle of nowhere.

A guy driving buy in an old pickup spots you and pulls up. He speaks broken English but you make out he is heading for the US border. You hop in and hope you'll be in the US in a few hours.

Instead this guy is looking for someone to cross the border with some dope and after a few hits of his own product, he and his amigos pretty much tell you to do what they say or they'll leave you for the vultures.

Of course you barely understand this as most of its in Spanish.

Have fun.

Posted: 3/30/2006 3:36:16 PM EDT

[#23]

Wanna buy some Chiclets?

Posted: 3/30/2006 3:36:24 PM EDT

[#24]

You would be the fill in when the donkey show girl is out sick??

Posted: 3/30/2006 3:43:59 PM EDT

[#25]

Believe it or not there is a way to get your butt in a sling sneaking into Mexico.

Go there for business without paying the $21 and having the required passport, filling out the forms, and your butt goes directly to jail.

Then you too can say, "But, but, but, I just came here to work."

Tj

Posted: 3/30/2006 3:53:34 PM EDT

[#26]

LOL, it happened to me, sort of. A friend and I were hiking along the river near El Paso, and apparently we set off a motion detector or something. The U.S. Border Patrol picked us up. They said they'd never seen anyone sneaking south before.

When I was flying F-4's in Yuma around 1982, we were shooting 5" "Zuni" rockets at a range near the border. One of the guys accidentally lofted one into Mexico. It was like a Road Runner/Wiley Coyote cartoon. Utter silence on the radios as we watched the thing until the motor burned out and it disappeared. Then a few more long seconds and a big "POOF" on the horizon. Turned into a minor international incident, the Marines firing on Mexico.

Posted: 3/30/2006 3:57:44 PM EDT

[#27]

Quoted:
Quoted:
I think they lock you in jail.

After they attempt to take all of your money by hoping you will bribe them off.

Then they beat you because you only have $20.00.

When you ask to make a phone call they suddenly only speak Spanish and you fvcked.

In jail you find out that if you can wire enough money down there they will let you go. Problem is trying to get around the political BS between the various guards and prisoners who are all on the take somehow.

Then, after somehow getting money down to pay, the fine goes up. By the grace of God you do find a way to pay the fine they drop you in the middle of nowhere.

A guy driving buy in an old pickup spots you and pulls up. He speaks broken English but you make out he is heading for the US border. You hop in and hope you'll be in the US in a few hours.

Instead this guy is looking for someone to cross the border with some dope and after a few hits of his own product, he and his amigos pretty much tell you to do what they say or they'll leave you for the vultures.

Of course you barely understand this as most of its in Spanish.

Have fun.

Gee, that's detailed. Thanks for sharing!

Posted: 3/30/2006 4:01:50 PM EDT

[#28]

Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
I think they lock you in jail.

I wrote blah, blah, blah

Gee, that's detailed. Thanks for sharing!

No problem. I even mispelled some of the words.

Corruption. Its what's for dinner in Mexico.

Posted: 3/30/2006 4:12:08 PM EDT

[#29]

Instead of being the border crosser, be the coyote. Go pick up a bunch of illegals and shuttle them back across through the desert

Posted: 3/30/2006 4:14:12 PM EDT

[#30]

Quoted:
They force you to make tortillias.

And they force you to pose as Virgin Mary for the packaging.

Posted: 3/30/2006 4:19:30 PM EDT

[#31]

you would learn what this means:
Muchacho, usted seguro tiene una boca bonita. su mi nueva novia

Posted: 3/30/2006 5:11:22 PM EDT

[#32]

Quoted:
LOL, it happened to me, sort of. A friend and I were hiking along the river near El Paso, and apparently we set off a motion detector or something. The U.S. Border Patrol picked us up. They said they'd never seen anyone sneaking south before.

Had something similar happen a few years ago in east San Diego county. I was scouting locations by vehicle for a Search and Rescue exercise for my CAP squadron near Jacumba. Never crossed the border but was pretty close. Had a BP agent come hauling ass up to me just when I turned back north. He was rather stunned to see me. Said everybody had gotten all excited seeing someone heading *south* toward the border.

I told him what I was up to and he was cool about it (and relived at the same time).

Posted: 3/30/2006 5:22:05 PM EDT

[#33]

How much are those sensor worth? you could make some money pulling them up!

Posted: 3/30/2006 5:27:53 PM EDT

[#34]

Quoted:
you would learn what this means:
Muchacho, usted seguro tiene una boca bonita. su mi nueva novia

"Jé, hombre, tu boca está muy bonita. Estás tú un maricón? No? Estás un maricón ahora, chico guapo, y estás mi esposa nueva! Tómelo, tómelo, cabrón!"

Posted: 3/30/2006 5:29:24 PM EDT

[#35]

I was detained by Mexican cops once. It's not gonna happen again.

Posted: 3/30/2006 5:36:59 PM EDT

[#36]

Quoted:
I was detained by Mexican cops once. It's not gonna happen again.

Tell us more!

Posted: 3/30/2006 5:40:29 PM EDT

[#37]

Quoted:
Quoted:
I was detained by Mexican cops once. It's not gonna happen again.

Tell us more!

A paperwork issue that ended with the Aduana confiscating a vehicle and sending us back over the border after sitting for more than 10 hours. The vehicle disapeared from Aduana custody and was found three years later, still in Mexico. Did I mention we watched them strip the vehicles around us for those 10 hours?

Posted: 3/30/2006 6:21:44 PM EDT

[#38]

Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
I was detained by Mexican cops once. It's not gonna happen again.

Tell us more!

A paperwork issue that ended with the Aduana confiscating a vehicle and sending us back over the border after sitting for more than 10 hours. The vehicle disapeared from Aduana custody and was found three years later, still in Mexico. Did I mention we watched them strip the vehicles around us for those 10 hours?

That's messed up.

Posted: 3/30/2006 7:03:16 PM EDT

[#39]

Quoted:
Quoted:
you would learn what this means:
Muchacho, usted seguro tiene una boca bonita. su mi nueva novia

"Jé, hombre, tu boca está muy bonita. Estás tú un maricón? No? Estás un maricón ahora, chico guapo, y estás mi esposa nueva! Tómelo, tómelo, cabrón!"

¿usted está golpeando en mí? usted me está deseando hasta la fecha?

Posted: 3/30/2006 7:06:55 PM EDT

[#40]

Quoted:
Would I get amnesty after awhile?

Or a free ride and a bus ride home?

It is a felony (their equiv) to illegally enter Mexico.

I'll give a "funny" story about how things work... Even in the "nice" part called Cancun. I went down there with a few friends during spring break... We were all 24+, not really crazy college kids or anything. The beaches are supposed to be public property. There was a wet t-shirt contest at one of the hotels and I started taking pictures ( I was on the beach.) The hotel employees fucking surrounded me and demanded my film... I stupidly... refused. They called the cops. The cops pitch up and take me down to the station (they didn't cuff me, they were decent) and proceed to tell me that I need to a pay a $100 (US) fine. Huh ? I was on a public beach, wtf ? The guy behind the desk politely informs me that a girl was raped last night and I sort of look like the guy by her reports, I should pay the fine. I paid the fine and didn't leave the hotel property until we left for the airport.

You hould have seen the (my) hotel staff dragging (and laying a cash fine) college age guests into the office for breaking minor things or causing trouble.

FWIW: I was in Coz diving the previous night... Just to head off the smart ass remarks.

Posted: 3/30/2006 7:25:45 PM EDT

[#41]

Quoted:
Instead of being the border crosser, be the coyote. Go pick up a bunch of illegals and shuttle them back across through the desert

Nother funny story... We went down from San Diego with my best friend and her Navy pilot boyfriend with some of his Sqdrn mates to Rosrita <sp?>... She is of Asian decent, we are in the back of the truck and it has a bed cover.
So, the BP guy looks in the back... Here are all these Americans (obviously) and this Asian chick... I look at him and made some remarks about bringing her back into the country and what sort of duty do I have to pay on her, where can I buy her a green card, etc ?

He laughed and checked her D/L. Good sport that guy.

Posted: 3/30/2006 7:46:04 PM EDT

[#42]

I can show you a couple of real easy places to get through the fence. No sensors, light BP presence, and a train route within a mile or so.

Good luck, and brush up on your spanish before you head out, you're gonna need it.

Posted: 3/30/2006 7:54:57 PM EDT

[#43]

Don't forget that Mexico presumes you are guilty until you prove otherwise.

I once heard a story from a shooting instructor about a Border Patrol officer who took the family to camp on a Mexican beach. Two locals thought it would be fun to rape his wife. He killed one of them, I forget how, it was a shovel or a knife. Then he threw the family in the truck and hit the border ASAP.

Fuck Mexico. Belize is nicer and has an English legal system.

Posted: 3/30/2006 8:06:10 PM EDT

[#44]

Somebody's gotta say it:

You'd be doing the white collar work Mexicans won't do.

Posted: 3/30/2006 8:57:34 PM EDT

[#45]

You'd get a burrito up the cornhole probably.

Aye, yi, yi, yi.......I am dee Frito Bandito
I love Fritos cornchips
I love dem I do
I love Fritos cornchips
I'll get dem from you....

Anyone remember that jingle?

Posted: 3/30/2006 9:06:27 PM EDT

[#46]

Friend of mine and I were held up by Mexican Police for a 20,000 peso ($40. at the time) bribe once. We got away. I wrote to the Mexican Aambassador when I got home. The police got 8 years in prison for extortion.

The Mexican Constitution gives the accused the presumption of innocence until found guilty. Trials are held before a panel of judges not a jury. I don't believe they have bail so the accused stay in jail until trial. Some cases take years to decide. The case cited above only took 3 months or so, the Ambassador gets swift justice.

It's a fine story perhaps I'll put it on my website.