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Posted: 3/13/2006 7:53:28 PM EDT
[#1]
You might get anally raped by some third-world ship's steward.
But I hear the buffet is really good. |
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Posted: 3/13/2006 7:54:26 PM EDT
[#2]
i'm going on a cArribien cruise next month during the kids spring break. We are going on a Costa. 7 days for 1600 fora family of 4.
We went on a 4 day california cruise last year on carnival. had a huge amount of children on that cruise. My wife wen with the kids the year before that on RC voyager of the seas. She said it was a hell big ship. she had a great time and said the food awas great. |
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Posted: 3/13/2006 7:54:53 PM EDT
[#3]
Probably pirates.
Maybe get thrown overboard by your wife. Or it could be a great time!  
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Posted: 3/13/2006 7:54:58 PM EDT
[#4]
Expect a lot of old farts- 60yr. +
Expect a lot of Shuffleboard Expect no hot women around the pool, only fat beached whales with bad camel toe and what looks like to be a trapped poodle in their bathing suits. Expect plenty of food, with that expect to come back weighing more than 8+ lbs heavier than b4. Expect watered down drinks Expect 1 night of formal dinner- dress appropriately. Other than that, don't expect much, I wouldn't waste the money on a cruise, the stops in towns if any are way too short so you don't see crap on land. Save your money and take the time to fly somewhere, rent a car and enjoy your time rather than watch it float by with nothing to show for it in the end. Just my .02 though. |
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Posted: 3/13/2006 7:55:37 PM EDT
[#5]
Lots of drunk women.
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Posted: 3/13/2006 7:58:04 PM EDT
[#6]
I take it you mean you have NOT been on a cruise before.
I have been on 4. And obviously I think they are a great value in a great vacation. All were 7-8 days. The first was such a delight it is still remembered as the best - but that may just be the novelty of how unique a cruise is. I can imagine that a 4-day would be nothing but a tease. It takes a few days to get into the swing of a cruise. Go for a 7-day if you can. I agree with the advice you have already gotten. Unless you are a 20-something, Carnival ain't the best choice. DanM |
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Posted: 3/13/2006 7:58:38 PM EDT
[#7]
You turn up missing like that guy on the Royal Caribbean.
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Posted: 3/13/2006 8:00:06 PM EDT
[#8]
The family and I went in September for a 4 day... it was friggin fun... They hardly move so dont worry about getting seasick. You feel it the first day but after a few hours you will be fine. TRUST ME I get seasick and I didnt feel sick at all.
Problem is that for two days after the cruise I STILL felt as I was moving and swaying.. ON TERRA FIRMA no less. But your body readjusts... Have fun... they are a blast. We are planning on a two week cruise to Alaska. |
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Posted: 3/13/2006 8:02:14 PM EDT
[#9]
I enjoyed my cruise.
I went RC and I was only 22 at the time. Sure I wanted to spend more time on the islands but that't the trade off. "Different tools for different jobs" if you will. Admit it, you seen places and meet people you've never would have seen or met if it wasn't for the cruise. |
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Posted: 3/13/2006 8:03:15 PM EDT
[#10]
At one point you will be completely surrounded by water.
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Posted: 3/13/2006 8:06:12 PM EDT
[#11]
OK But how would this freak you out... we were out in the middle of the ocean with NO land in sight and this boat comes and circles our boat twice then leaves... even had the staff wondering where the hell it came from... it was a small boat too. things that make you go hmmmmm. |
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Posted: 3/13/2006 8:07:20 PM EDT
[#12]
Spent 7 nights at sea on RC 10 years ago. Good time. Snorkeled in Jamaica and the Caymens. Food is good. Stick to what the cruise line recommends. Venture off on your own and you are on your own. It's rare that a ship returns with everyone that left on it. People go off with locals and don't make it back in time. No ship waiting. The only thing that would give me pause is all the ships that return to port because of the high percentage of passengers that get some kind of nasty virus and spend all their time puking up that good food. Other than that, it's a good time.
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Posted: 3/13/2006 8:08:20 PM EDT
[#13]
I think I will go with RC. Thanks guys.
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Posted: 3/13/2006 8:11:18 PM EDT
[#14]
I just booked my 1st cruise for end of June to the Bahama's. We fly into Orlando and cruise out for 4 days. I was told by the lady I booked the cruise with that there is one deck on all Carnival cruises especially for those wishing to lay out topless
 My wife has been on a cruise before from L.A. to Encinada and she said the ship was nice, but Ensinada is a ****hole of a town. We had a choice of Nassau, Bahama's or Cozumel, Mexico. We'll go to Cozumel next year. BTW, you will need your original or certified copy of your birth certificate now unless you have a passport. Passports will be required on all cruises starting in 2007. EVEN to Hawaii !!! |
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Posted: 3/13/2006 8:14:19 PM EDT
[#15]
We did this one last august....Carnival fit our needs....(family of 5, 2 under 6)..would do it again in a heartbeat. I know many arent hip on Carnival....but it worked for us. I believe mall-ninja did the RC cruise the same week. |
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Posted: 3/13/2006 8:15:24 PM EDT
[#16]
Unless you like the big ship experience for itself, I'd recommend you check out this company I used to work for www.cruisewest.com/ Not really the best employer, but the customers seemed to really really enjoy themselves. It always seemed preferable than being part of a horde that swamp the ports of call. American owned and run, too. |
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Posted: 3/13/2006 8:17:04 PM EDT
[#17]
I spent alot of time on cruise boards before booking and before we departed. As far as seasickness....not one of us had a problem but from what I read before we went, if you do the ultrasonic bands work best. We went on Carnival the last week of summer....tons of kids....(including ours) But it was only really noticable on the pool deck and the ice cream bar. RC is getting quite a rep with kids programs so they may indeed have a decent amt of kids. Avoid peak family times on either line. Also, in terms of dress code, carnival is LESS strict then most in terms of the dining room and formal night |
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Posted: 3/13/2006 8:22:07 PM EDT
[#18]
Enjoy the Norwalk virus
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Posted: 3/13/2006 8:34:54 PM EDT
[#19]
I went back thru the boards I used to visit and found website....
It has pics of quite a few cruises that a couple has been on, the wife is an agent....He has reviews and some sample menus. cruising with the halls one thing, I read over and over was to make sure you either book direct with the cruise line or use a CLIA certified travel agent.... Cruise Critic |
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Posted: 3/13/2006 8:39:28 PM EDT
[#20]
Some friends of mine have made several cruises. She's a Dept. of Health inspector, so lots of her attitude comes from requiring sanitary conditions.
She says "stick to newer ships-- they have cleaner galleys than older ships do." Also, "try to find a ship that will have made a few trips with the same crew." They got onto a ship whose crew had largely been replaced the day before, and the service sucked! No one had their act together, several of the 'planned events' never even happened, and schedules were all awry. This was on a cruise line that they'd travelled before, too! As for $$$ matters: MAKE SURE you have a refund policy IN WRITING in case the ship has to miss one or more ports! Storms, riots, & other tensions can cause missed ports, so make sure the cruise line will reimburse you if this happens. (See paragraph 2, above. They had to wait a loong time to get their refunds.) Bon voyage! |
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Posted: 3/14/2006 2:41:41 PM EDT
[#21]
theonly thing I saw one the topless upper on my carnival cruise were beached whales.LOL
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Posted: 3/14/2006 2:51:54 PM EDT
[#22]
If you snorkel get some of the diver's sunscreen available down there. It's a little pricey but not near as painful as having your back lobster red after several hours of floating around on your belly looking at the pretty fish and wondering if that toothy bastard called a barracuda will decide to bite your wienie. It's the exact color and texture of snot but will stay on and protect you for hours.
You will enjoy it. 
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Posted: 3/14/2006 2:59:52 PM EDT
[#23]
I know this sounds crazy but I just spent 7 night in the Carribbean on the Costa Mediteranea. It was an incredible expirience. I got 2 tickets in a balcony suite for $1300. I had an excellent time, the food was incredible (much better than Carnival from what I hear). All kinds of activities on board the ship. I found it to be an incredible value for what we got. I booked through here they were $100 cheaper than everywhere else (which I used to upgrade to a suite). I will most certainly be cruising with Costa again.
(surprisingly this is my first post since I have been back). |
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Posted: 3/14/2006 3:06:00 PM EDT
[#24]
Using the bathroom is the best part. Sit on the john with your pants down and flush it, the suction is amazing. Don’t try this if you have big balls.
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Posted: 3/14/2006 3:23:42 PM EDT
[#25]
food is all included on a cruise, so eat a lot and try stuff you've enver had
I had escargot for the first time on a cruise. it's normally too expensive to try if you don't think you'll like it, but since it was included it was worth the risk, and pretty good too alcohol and pop aren't included though, so on the cruise to alaska my family took the first thing we did at the first port was to go to a grocery store and buy a few 2L bottles to keep in the room fridge |
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Posted: 3/14/2006 3:25:56 PM EDT
[#26]
Can anyone explain to me why pop is charged and juice and coffee is free??
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Posted: 3/14/2006 3:26:38 PM EDT
[#27]
Bed bugs. Did you see 'Dateline" on NBC? The couple they focused on brought them home with them in their luggage. After throwing out all their clothing, furniture, carpet etc. and having their house sprayed something like 6 times they still had them.
They said New York hotels are having problems with them too. |
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Posted: 3/14/2006 3:32:02 PM EDT
[#28]
Legionnaire's Disease?
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Posted: 3/14/2006 3:32:29 PM EDT
[#29]
+1 |
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Posted: 3/14/2006 3:37:43 PM EDT
[#30]
The ship I'm sailing on in June is one coming from New Orleans housing the homeless... 
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Posted: 3/14/2006 3:45:42 PM EDT
[#31]
I went on a cruise as a kid and thought it sucked. The room was tiny, no bathtub (only a shower), the food was OK, they kicked me out of the casino, the walls felt paper thin, etc.
Twas on the S.S. Majestic. Maybe pirates have sunk it by now. My dad had been on one like 15-20 years earlier, and didn't like it, but figured they would have been better by the early 90s. |
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Posted: 3/14/2006 3:47:52 PM EDT
[#32]
I think the above is in the "package". I prefer the smaller tours like the one I'm going on in Fiji. Only 75 to kill if I get ass raped there. That's doable. |
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Posted: 3/14/2006 3:48:10 PM EDT
[#33]
Good choice - did an RC cruise for the honeymoon. Was perfect for us: inclusive travel, lodging, food. Plenty of time to, um, relax together  . I found Carnival to be more of a younger party-type atmosphere compared with RC.As for seasickness, I'm sure you already know. Keep hydrated, get some good meds. The seasickness bands for wrists actually stimulate a known acupuncture point, and some are investigating them for postoperative nausea. They worked on me once after puking my lungs up deep-sea fishing in rough seas. Scopolamine patches are nice, just don't touch them & rub your eyes - you'll get blurry vision. I know of a doc who wore two at a time... she didn't get seasick, but also didn't remember a thing. Just like atropine, too much can make you goofy. Enjoy the trip. |
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Posted: 3/14/2006 3:54:46 PM EDT
[#34]
I despise the term sheeple, but it's the first thing that comes to mind when I think of a cruise.
Fat, stupid, unadventureous, people who think Hard Rock is the pinnacle of destination cuisine. |
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Posted: 3/14/2006 3:57:49 PM EDT
[#35]
at the dinner table order one of each appetizer and two main courses if you feel like it.
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Posted: 3/14/2006 4:04:25 PM EDT
[#36]
The real question is, which ones can you take your CCW aboard?
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Posted: 3/14/2006 4:30:12 PM EDT
[#37]
Does that cost extra? Just curious . . . 
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Posted: 3/14/2006 4:34:08 PM EDT
[#38]
Are you kidding I couldn't even take my pocket knife, and got funny looks about taking my Surefire G2 |
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Posted: 3/14/2006 4:39:41 PM EDT
[#39]
Take the gay cruise, you will get all your drinks free
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Posted: 3/14/2006 5:28:34 PM EDT
[#40]
I've been on 3 cruises in the last year.
Royal Caribbean has pretty good food, but the cabins are a little smaller than average as I recall. The routine is: Get up when you want, eat as much as you want, use the gym or lay in the sun or read. Eat some more, watch a movie, go to shore, have a snack, take a nap. Get ready for dinner, eat a lot more, go to a live show and see a comic, a broadway type show, or some musical presentation. Go to the casino, walk around the Promenade Deck in the moonlight, have sex, go have a late snack, rinse, repeat. Lots of old folks who are fairly nice people, not too many hard bodies, but they are there if you look. Best to take your own because NOBODY gets lucky on a cruise, except maybe the crew or the gay guys. It's worth the money if you have it, but you can travel cheaper and see more by land. The upside is, the food is safe and a sure thing, you're not always packing and unpacking, there are no airport/taxi/connection hassles, and you should try it once to see if you like it. My best cruise was a combo. We flew to Venice, Italy. Stayed two days, took a train to Florence for two days, took a train to Rome for two days. Got on a nice (Celebrity) cruise ship for 12 days in Greece, Turkey and Italian ports, then flew back to the US. Just got back in June from that one, then went to the Panama canal for an 11 day cruise, and just last week I got back from an 8 day cruise to Mexico. I need to go on a serious diet now, but see above about eating. Have fun. |
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Posted: 3/14/2006 6:53:53 PM EDT
[#41]
I tried the escargot, too. Tasted like garlic with the consistency of gum. They are not really snails anyway. It's the barnacles they scrape off the bottom while in dock. |
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Posted: 3/14/2006 7:00:17 PM EDT
[#42]
I went on one when i was in... uhh.... 6th grade.... it was awesome.... it was right after 9/11 tho so there was a lot tighter security.... lots of guys with big black rifles...
I leave for another one in 10 days... spring break.. royal carribean.... Last one was over new years, on a carnival ship... that sold booze to kids 18-21 if they got a waiver signed by their parents.... lots of drunks tho.... it was a ton of fun.... if u do go.. make sure u get insurance like somebody else said, and if u fly with the package, get insurance on that too so that if u miss the boat cuz their plane was late, u get a catch-up to the boat at the next stop for free..... But other than that.... the captain was italian and so was his wife, and she liked to go around topless... and she was definently not a "beached whale"  
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Posted: 3/14/2006 7:03:10 PM EDT
[#43]
I went on Carnival. Food sucked and so did Cozumel.
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