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Posted: 2/21/2006 3:41:24 AM EDT
Unfuckingbelievable.
So I came home yesterday, and tolerated the gay "roommate" all day. Come the evening I made it very clear he was NOT staying at my house. No fuckin way. Move on down the road slim, ya aint stayin here. My wife pulls the "Wheres he going to stay?" card. Not my fuckin problem now is it sunshine? My concern extends to getting his leaky ass offa my couch and outta my house. Mission accomplished! The world over rejoiced in ma authority. Well, during the day a friend of ours comes over, as she was supposed to babysit for us. The gay guy filled in in the AM and the chic showed up later in the day, so in the end it works out ok. The girl who came over recently graduated college as a massager (Massouse? Massouser? Whatever, she rubs ya down) and gave me and the wife massages because she needs practice. Very cool. I have to admit there was something sexy in watching my half nekkid wife get covered in lotion and rubbed down by another chic. Our friend is pretty easy on the eyes.....Alas, I digress. So evening comes, the gay guys ex b/f comes to get him to he can go get his stuff. The ex b/f says hes bringing him back here. I go off on the guy. The hell you are! I am NOT a halfway house for all your fucks, and I'm not a local dropoff for all your cute little puppies that follow you around. Take his ass ELSEWHERE, and I'm serious as a fuckin heart attack. So he does...... I go to work....Get a call around 9:30.... "Do you care if the girl stays the night?" Jesus unfuckingbelievable Christ. I can give in to her though, she gives massages, has a sorta job and graduated college. Alot farther along then the gay guy. So shit, anyone else need a place to stay? Everyone else does, you might as well too! 
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Posted: 2/21/2006 3:43:01 AM EDT
[#1]
Do ya have cable and cold beer?
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Posted: 2/21/2006 3:43:45 AM EDT
[#2]
Haha, I have cable but you gotta bring your own beer! |
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Posted: 2/21/2006 3:53:01 AM EDT
[#3]
I'm there!
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Posted: 2/21/2006 3:56:23 AM EDT
[#4]
Bring a pillow. Way things are going they'll all be claimed by the time you get here. 
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Posted: 2/21/2006 3:57:03 AM EDT
[#5]
How about a little background on how and why the "gay" roommate came to stay there? And why does your wife want all these different people staying there when you are away at work? I'm not being sarcastic or stirring the pot but those would be some red flags in my eyes...............
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Posted: 2/21/2006 3:57:39 AM EDT
[#6]
Just ask the Massouse for a massage and a happy ending and you'll feel much better.
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Posted: 2/21/2006 3:59:18 AM EDT
[#7]
Click Not a cause for alarm. We dont have marital problems, we have friends who have problems. |
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Posted: 2/21/2006 3:59:59 AM EDT
[#8]
A girl could pay her rent in my place with massages for at least a night.
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Posted: 2/21/2006 4:01:11 AM EDT
[#9]
Ummm This thread is worthless without pictures.
The hot chick, she is cool bring home some extra booze tonight. All chicks are Bi, some just need a few drinks for it to show  
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Posted: 2/21/2006 4:03:22 AM EDT
[#10]
Do I have to share a room with the masseuse?
Well ....... okay. |
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Posted: 2/21/2006 4:09:14 AM EDT
[#11]
Glad to hear of their problems and the situation not being on your end. I would have suggested walking around naked playing with a rifle and licking your favorite knife with that Private Pyle in the head before he shot himself and the Gunny look on your face but then i remembered these guys are gay and it might just turn them on and not freak them out. I'll have to think on how to get rid of them ........
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Posted: 2/21/2006 4:20:54 AM EDT
[#12]
Demanding fucker. 
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Posted: 2/21/2006 4:25:02 AM EDT
[#13]
Specop,
how about pie? Do you have pie? Then I'm there! (j/k and I mean the food kind of pie  )
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Posted: 2/21/2006 4:32:20 AM EDT
[#14]
Kansas is just about dead centor of the lower 48. I say we organize a massive arfcom road trip this summer. I know a place in Kansas thatwill put us up for free.
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Posted: 2/21/2006 4:37:09 AM EDT
[#15]
Bring ammo and beer. In fact, bring lots of both.
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Posted: 2/21/2006 4:42:16 AM EDT
[#16]
Can I get a massage too?
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Posted: 2/21/2006 4:56:38 AM EDT
[#17]
on my way but i request pie and massage
and beer...... or beer pie ...................mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
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Posted: 2/21/2006 5:01:35 AM EDT
[#18]
hey send the massage girl over to my place, i can make room for her.
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Posted: 2/21/2006 5:03:41 AM EDT
[#19]
You should always let a chick that can give a massage stay
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Posted: 2/21/2006 5:10:34 AM EDT
[#20]
Yeah, I was thinkin that too. I didnt complain much when the wife asked if she could stay. Hot massage chiccie....Good to go. Gay guy.......Get the fuck on!
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Posted: 2/21/2006 5:17:21 AM EDT
[#21]
What I mean to say is marriage is full of compromise and you should do all you can to make your wife happy. 
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Posted: 2/21/2006 5:20:09 AM EDT
[#22]
Keep the pimp hand strong.....
Damn, that is unacceptable. Good Luck!! |
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Posted: 2/21/2006 5:30:19 AM EDT
[#23]
You ought to run over to Team and take a look at page 14 of the Jason280 BOTD thread.....That's what could happen with a little liqour and a few well timed suggestions
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Posted: 2/21/2006 5:32:50 AM EDT
[#24]
Could it be that the wife was interested in some three way action ????
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Posted: 2/21/2006 5:34:41 AM EDT
[#25]
Just wait till your dozing on the couch, you'll wake up to a nice massage, and you roll over to find the gay guy fondling you!
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Posted: 2/21/2006 5:34:44 AM EDT
[#26]
I volunteer to keep the massuese busy and out of your hair.
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Posted: 2/21/2006 5:35:41 AM EDT
[#27]
Well, if I don't get a perm job making what I was making before or a second job making at least $1k a month. I may be needing a room.
Be willing to share a room with the masseuse friend of yours. |
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Posted: 2/21/2006 5:44:54 AM EDT
[#28]
That dudes long gone. His ex b/f took him back to his parents a ways down the road. 
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Posted: 2/21/2006 5:46:01 AM EDT
[#29]
Kick the wife out… keep the “masseuse.”
Optionally, start charging rent. $40 a day ought to be enough incentive to send the freeloaders down to the shelter for the night. |
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Posted: 2/21/2006 5:52:11 AM EDT
[#30]
Dude, don't move to FL. I have had more guests/company in the two years that I have lived here than the entire 14 I lived in VA.
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Posted: 2/21/2006 5:52:50 AM EDT
[#31]
Aw, fuck it dude. Since this situation will end badly, you might as well pull a Hail Mary and try to get the Wife and Masseuse (sp?) together. All women are bi, as someone else said.
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Posted: 2/21/2006 6:17:14 AM EDT
[#32]
I'll be sure to look you up if I am in the area and need a place to stay.
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Posted: 2/21/2006 9:27:31 AM EDT
[#33]
WTF  j/k
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Posted: 2/21/2006 9:51:12 AM EDT
[#34]
I have leave in late may to early June. If it's around those times, I could drop by for a day or two maybe. 
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Posted: 2/21/2006 10:39:30 AM EDT
[#35]
OK everyone - PARTY AT SPECOP_007's TONIGHT!
Uh, you got a hot tub? |
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Posted: 2/21/2006 10:41:46 AM EDT
[#36]
I'll bring the chips and salsa
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Posted: 2/21/2006 1:22:50 PM EDT
[#37]
Brother, do you really want my opinion? Remember I sleep every night between two women.... |
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Posted: 2/21/2006 5:27:41 PM EDT
[#38]
hey spec, tell massage girl i got an empty room in my apartment, lol, im right over here in manhattan, and since i got served my dovorce papers today, i now have alot of extra room around the place.
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Posted: 2/21/2006 5:37:32 PM EDT
[#39]
You can eat and pay your bills on $250 a week I'm impressed. |
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Posted: 2/21/2006 5:48:39 PM EDT
[#40]
You have to share a couch with the gay one.  -Ben |
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Posted: 2/21/2006 6:10:49 PM EDT
[#41]
So where in KS are ya?? I can be in Wichita in less than two hours!
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Posted: 2/21/2006 6:49:29 PM EDT
[#42]
Sounds like Specop_007's gonna make us shoot our way into his crib, fellas... First guy to make the "swish" scream like a little girl, gets the sofa bed. |
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Posted: 2/21/2006 8:12:46 PM EDT
[#43]
Its not cool when your wife goes behind your back and undermines your decisions. I understand completely. Just today, mine refused to let me go lion hunting.
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Posted: 2/21/2006 10:45:42 PM EDT
[#44]
Holy shit that's gotta be one of the funniest things I've read on Arfcom! Damn straight I want a massage, beer and pie! (Apple if ya got it) Jason |
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Posted: 2/21/2006 10:51:39 PM EDT
[#45]
If you have friends who have problems, and those friends are in your life, then you have marital problems. You just don't know it yet. No healthy marriage lets chaos inside the castle walls. |
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Posted: 2/22/2006 8:52:23 AM EDT
[#46]
WTF is wrong with you? The answer should have been, "yes but only if we have a threesome." That should stop your wife's future boarding hospitality nature.
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Posted: 2/22/2006 9:01:28 AM EDT
[#47]
Stop posting. It makes me cry. |
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Posted: 2/22/2006 9:15:04 AM EDT
[#48]
well, if you decide that the massuese cant stay sometime down the line, ASK HER IF SHE LIKES MINNESOTA!!
my back is always sore from work. |
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Posted: 2/22/2006 9:21:26 AM EDT
[#49]
So get a web cam and put the massage sessions on the internet and charge for access.
The women, not you.Might as well share the wealth so to speak and make a couple bucks. |
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Posted: 2/22/2006 9:41:21 AM EDT
[#50]
SIIHPAPP............ the massager of course.
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