A reliable source out of south Florida has it on good authority that the 101st Airborne will soon be returning home and attending special training in advance of an outbreak of avian flu stateside.
In recent days Avian (bird) Flu has been discovered in European fowl and this outbreak migrated from Asia where hundreds were made ill from contact with infected birds. As many as 60 Asians died from the outbreak.
The U.S. Government's concern is that the flu, which presently is only transmitted from direct contact between infected birds and humans, may mutate and thus have the ability to be transferred from human to human. This doomsday scenerio would be reminicent of the flu outbreak of 1918 where millions world-wide died and approx. one-half million U.S. citizens died from the pandemic.
Word has it that President Bush has implemented a plan (code name: Blue Bird) to be executed in the event the flu virus mutates. If the event it happens, Bush will, by executive order, require the elite 101st Airborne to be dispatched to different locals along the migration pathways of the outbreak to insure that nation-wide spreading of the disease does not take place. Quarantines will be mandatory and enforcement will be "shoot to kill" anyone breaking the quarantine lines.
Bush was quoted as saying: "It doesn't matter if they're from the blue states or the red states. You get the flu... well... too bad for you. Shoot the poor bastards and put them out of their misery."