We were at Lamberts Cafe outside Springfield, MO a couple weeks ago.  My 3-year old had to go to the bathroom on the way out so I took him.  He goes and he gets his pants back up and then I figure I might as well go too.  So, I whip it out and start doing my business and he looks at me and says "Daddy, you're tinkle looks just like a fire hose!"  I just about died laughing.  Luckily, we were the only ones in there at the time.  My son loves fire engines and firefighters so everything revolves around fire equipment.

you have to teach that when mama is not around it's ok to call it a dick  

Quoted: you have to teach that when mama is not around it's ok to call it a dick

Except that I don't like that term either.

Quoted: Quoted: you have to teach that when mama is not around it's ok to call it a dick   Except that I don't like that term either.

Pecker is so much more civilized.

just tell him to call it a firehose.

It will certainly make the parties more interesting.

Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: you have to teach that when mama is not around it's ok to call it a dick   Except that I don't like that term either. Pecker is so much more civilized.

That's what I call it but my wife doesn't like that either.  Still do it though...

I have named my penis Richard so it would be alright to say my DICK.

Last Valentine's Day my nephew got sent home from school.  Apparently he was only sharing valentines with the girls, and not the boys.  This being a sissy Montasorri school, the teacher had to butt in and find out what was wrong.  Anyway he got popped for saying "My uncle says you should only cross the plumbling when it's two cute girls".  

Sounds like something I'd say but not in front of him.

Quoted: Last Valentine's Day my nephew got sent home from school.  Apparently he was only sharing valentines with the girls, and not the boys.  This being a sissy Montasorri school, the teacher had to butt in and find out what was wrong.  Anyway he got popped for saying "My uncle says you should only cross the plumbling when it's two cute girls".   Sounds like something I'd say but not in front of him.

thats awesome.

I went to a birthday party with my friends and thier kids at a Chucky Cheese a few years back.  For those of you that have no idea it's a 3 story kid playhose with animatronic shows,  video games,  and jungle jim crap everywhere.

We were all kind of spread out keeping an eye on the kids and my bros son Chad ( 3 years old ) says he has to go potty,  OK no problem I'll go with you.  I get him in there and they have a shorty urinal for kids ,  so he steps up to the plate and takes care of his business.  I take a quick peek over at the sinks and when I look back he's all buttoned up and coming my way with the urinal cake in his hand,  " look soap "  

NOOOOOOOOO.....  

As my wife took my 3 yr old daughter to the store with her to get some bananas, Sprite, and soda crackers to try anything for some relief of a 3-day case of diarrhea and plug me up, and they're in the checkout line ...

"This is for my dad.  He's got a real bad case of the shits!"  The wife said the checkout girl damn near dropped to the floor she was laughing so hard!