TRUE TALES OF InDUHviduals
While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent
which direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun
waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the north?"
When another person jumped in and explained that the sun rises in the
east (and has for some time), she shook her head and said, "Oh, I don't
keep up with that stuff."
And then she voted.
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I used to work in technical support for a 24x7 call center. One day I got
a call from an InDUHvidual who asked what hours the call center was open.
I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a
week."
He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to end the
call quickly, I said, "Pacific.."
And then he voted.
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So my colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria when
we overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn
she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in a
convertible, but "didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car was
moving."
And then she voted.
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I was in a high school advanced physics class and the teacher was
talking about a new military weapon that uses sonic waves on the
battlefield to burst enemy soldier's chests. One InDUHvidual in the
class spoke up and said,
"Well that's stupid! Why don't they just wear headphones?"
And a few years later, he voted.
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My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car. It's designed to cut through
a seatbelt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the passenger side door's
map pocket.
And then she voted.
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My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases
were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought two cases. The
cashier multiplied two times 10% and gave us a 20% discount.
And then they all voted.
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I was hanging out with a conservative friend of mine when we saw a
woman walk by us with a nose ring attached to an earring by a chain. My
friend said, "Wouldn't the chain rip out every time she turned her
head?"
I had to explain to her that a person's nose and ear remain the same
distance apart no matter which way the head is turned.
And then she voted.
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I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area. So I went to
the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never
showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because they
were trained professionals and I was in good hands.
"Now," she asked me, "has your plane arrived yet?"
And then she voted.