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Posted: 10/22/2004 1:56:16 PM EDT
I'm entering some unknown but clearly bad territory.

Background:
I'm 23.
This 41 year old woman I know (German citizen here on a green card for 40 years), call her M, was kicked out of her last house by her boyfriend (who was considerably younger than her). She claimed he was abusive and she spent all of her money on him. We had a mutual friend and she asked if she could stay with me for three weeks in my empty bedroom. I agreed on the condition that she clean and buy food (she barely lived up to hthese requirements after much prodding) and that she not smoke in my place. She agreed and I helped her quit her smoking habit (she is still clean 2 months later). In that time I helped her move all of her stuff out of her old place and paid for a storage unit for her to put it in (she agreed to pay me back). In the mean time I tried to straighten out her life by pushing her to get a job, check her accounts, cut off the phone service at her old house (she didn't and her boyfriend ran up another $100 bill), and I got her $150 back from a wireless company that was defrauding her. In the mean time she had been driving illegally (arrested and suspended license for unpaid fines) every day.

I was looking for a place to live with my other friend. M wanted in on it badly and I reluctantly agreed. We settled on a place, but M admitted her credit was appaling and she still ahd no money. I agreed to front her the money out of the goodness of my heart (since after much prodding she was searching for a job).  My credit balanced out hers and I paid for her deposit and first months rent. M asked her mother for a good sum of money which she apparently received. She paid off her deposit and spent the rest of her money on other items. In the mean time I had to buy her shelving and assemble it for her (again she promised to pay pack). She did get a job as a computer store manager and paid me about half of the first month's rent back. She still owes me a lot of money but I haven't bugged her about it since she has a job and she has promised to pay it back in a month (she still owes me ~$400).


Current situation: Did I mention she is apaprently quite unstable?

The house phone was shut off three days ago (it's in her name, other utilities are in my name) and she has yet to get it reactived despite numerous requests.

I've spoken perhaps 10 sentences to her all week and today she sent me a psycho BS email accusing me of "harassing and stalking" her and that she would get a notarized complaint and present it to me with witnesses if I didn't "stop" (there's nothing to stop). Apart from the fact that I've only asked her to fulfill her obligations, she is unattractive and technically old enough to be my mother and I would NOT (repeat NOT) hit it if it was bent over naked and begging before any of this shit.

Then our mutual friend told me she might be looking to bail on the lease.

If she will sit down and discuss things I think we can get a solution but I don't know how willing she will be.

SO:

Anyone know how to deal with this? Especially if she tries for some false legal stuff or to bail on the lease?

Will the landlord take legal action against her if she cuts and runs? (lease says tenants are responsible for landlord legal costs) and this is the first month of the $15K/yr lease (all three of our sigs on it).
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:00:16 PM EDT
[#1]
SHITPAPP
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:00:27 PM EDT
[#2]
You should have taken notice of this crazy bitch earlier and not gotten involved.


I would kick her ass out and chalk it up as a life lesson.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:01:24 PM EDT
[#3]
Cut your losses and run.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:03:14 PM EDT
[#4]

Quoted:
Cut your losses and run.



+1. She is obviously a psycho cunt and will have no problem using the law against you at this point. Run the fuck away. Trust me. RUN FORREST!

Edit: I see you're 23. You may not have had the misfortune of dealing with this type of psycho female  in your life yet. This woman you're describing is bad, bad news. Run the fuck away right now. Good thing you didn't fuck her BTW.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:04:50 PM EDT
[#5]
More proof that women are EVIL!!!
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:06:20 PM EDT
[#6]
Cover your ass.

Repeat: Cover your ass.


She will attempt to destroy you on her way down. She will only consider herself and not the consequences to you.




Signed, A witness to far to many train wrecks where a nice guy gets destroyed by a psycho bitch.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:07:31 PM EDT
[#7]

Quoted:
More proof that women are EVIL!!!



Here is the REAL proof women are evil:

Women = Time X Money
Time = Money
Women = Money^2
Money = root(evil)
Women = Evil
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:08:01 PM EDT
[#8]
IT'S A TRAP!
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:09:42 PM EDT
[#9]

Quoted:
Cover your ass.

Repeat: Cover your ass.


She will attempt to destroy you on her way down. She will only consider herself and not the consequences to you.




Signed, A witness to far to many train wrecks where a nice guy gets destroyed by a psycho bitch.



OK... what are some good CYA techniques? I don't know where to start.

Side note: the boyfriend who kicked her out of her house she claimed he beat severely and constantly her but she refused to take any legal action against him, even a restraining order.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:09:51 PM EDT
[#10]

Quoted:

Quoted:
More proof that women are EVIL!!!



Here is the REAL proof women are evil:

Women = Time X Money
Time = Money
Women = Money^2
Money = root(evil)
Women = Evil



Ya I saw that somewhere too.Funny.Oh wait I should just shut up I am(I think) super close to getting a girl friend.And she is a Bush fan.WOOO HOOOO!!
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:15:17 PM EDT
[#11]
First off, if she bails on you, she still will be responsible in the courts eyes for 1/3 rd of the 14k you spoke of period, minus what she has already paid for the years lease.

Your options would be:

1. Work it out, and keep her there.
2. Let her go and sue her. Continue to pay the rent and immediately sue her for the above amount, you will get it. Get another roommate to take her spot.


Basically, you are fucked on all accounts. Sorry dude.

Option 3: Let her go and continue to pay the rent without sueing her for it.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:15:40 PM EDT
[#12]

Quoted:


Side note: the boyfriend who kicked her out of her house she claimed he beat severely and constantly her but she refused to take any legal action against him, even a restraining order.




She refused to take any legal action because she made that shit up dude. I lived with a lunatic like that for over a year, so I'm familiar with the pattern. She's a nutjob. Oh yeah, before I forget...
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:23:04 PM EDT
[#13]

Quoted:

Quoted:


Side note: the boyfriend who kicked her out of her house she claimed he beat severely and constantly her but she refused to take any legal action against him, even a restraining order.




She refused to take any legal action because she made that shit up dude. I lived with a lunatic like that for over a year, so I'm familiar with the pattern. She's a nutjob. Oh yeah, before I forget...
www.starwars.stopklatka.pl/images/ackbar.jpg



Quite possible... she has also left two husbands and has an 18 year old kid.

Damnit I'm getting screwed and I don't have any sort of relationship with her.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:29:43 PM EDT
[#14]
1-800-HELL0 I.N.S. or be prepared to have your name & credit damaged.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:35:48 PM EDT
[#15]

Quoted:
1-800-HELL0 I.N.S. or be prepared to have your name & credit damaged.



What are they gonna deport her for? She's lived here her whole life and has a kid in college?

Driving with a suspended license? How am I going to get her busted for that?
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:37:22 PM EDT
[#16]

In the mean time I had to buy her shelving and assemble it for her


No, you didn't. Stop helping her. You are just asking for it.


Edit: I see you're 23. You may not have had the misfortune of dealing with this type of psycho female in your life yet. This woman you're describing is bad, bad news. Run the fuck away right now. Good thing you didn't fuck her BTW.


+1
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:38:16 PM EDT
[#17]
Keep records, lots of records ...... of everything.  Be able to tell somebody where you were in case she ever claims that you beat her.   Journal/Diary, whatever.

Minimize the amount of time you are alone with her. Be around people, she can't claim you beat her with you are out with others.

Keep recipts of everything.

Sever as many financial ties with her as you can (get a cell phone).

Have her get her stuff out of your storage room peacefully. Try to document that it all was there. Sever that tie to her and her stuff. She will later claim that you stole something. Prepare for it.

Take pictures of everything if you can.




She has the advantage in court (no penis), and she has your money. You have to be an asshole to get it back, and she will call you a stalker if you try. Get her out of your life and cut your losses.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:41:01 PM EDT
[#18]
get with your other roommate, see if the two of you are willing to bail out of this lease. If so, go to the property manager, and spill your guts about it. Ask to be let out of the lease, beg, whatever.
Pay an extra month penalty if you have to, just get distance between you and her as fast as possible.

The longer she is around you, the risk of bad things increases exponentially.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:41:40 PM EDT
[#19]
Eject, man.  This bird is heading for the ground fast, and there is no way to pull out of it.  You will lose money, you may even lose your sanity, but nothing is worth  losing freedom over.  And if you stick around, you will lose it.  She will accuse you of some right funky stuff in order to get away with what she did.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:45:11 PM EDT
[#20]
Find grounds to file a complaint on her, before she does it to you.

Document everything. Peaceably ask her to 'move on'.

Read up on Green Card restrictions - being indigent / dependent on public benefits / welfare is grounds for a violation / deportation. There are a lot of other employemnt and criminal violations re Green Cards, as well.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:48:08 PM EDT
[#21]

Quoted:
Driving with a suspended license? How am I going to get her busted for that?

Simple. Report that to the INS.
And when she bails on the lease, you file a civil suit for the monies owed. It's a legit suit, costs what, $25? to file? Those two things alone will open up an INS investigation on her. And with the Trail of Woe this stupid bitch has left behind, you KNOW there'll be plenty of other grounds as well.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:49:08 PM EDT
[#22]
lastly, reaserch and sum up all her vulnerabilities in this regard, then demonstrate to her that she has the losing hand, and she should go quietly.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:50:56 PM EDT
[#23]

Quoted:
Keep records, lots of records ...... of everything.  Be able to tell somebody where you were in case she ever claims that you beat her.   Journal/Diary, whatever.

Minimize the amount of time you are alone with her. Be around people, she can't claim you beat her with you are out with others.

Keep recipts of everything.

Sever as many financial ties with her as you can (get a cell phone).

Have her get her stuff out of your storage room peacefully. Try to document that it all was there. Sever that tie to her and her stuff. She will later claim that you stole something. Prepare for it.

Take pictures of everything if you can.




She has the advantage in court (no penis), and she has your money. You have to be an asshole to get it back, and she will call you a stalker if you try. Get her out of your life and cut your losses.



All true... storage is done and closed (she moved it all out to the house)

I have a cellphone but it doesn't work at hte house (dead spot)


Quoted:
No, you didn't. Stop helping her. You are just asking for it.
+1



I should rephrase... I had to buy the shelving if I wanted her 15 boxes of books unpacked and off the dining room table, otherwise you are right.

-----

At least I have tons of people who will attest to my character but she has very very few.

Pictures are good idea


-

Other roommate has not moved in yet (but he has paid his first months rent and deposit)
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 2:56:30 PM EDT
[#24]

Quoted:

Quoted:
Driving with a suspended license? How am I going to get her busted for that?

Simple. Report that to the INS.
And when she bails on the lease, you file a civil suit for the monies owed. It's a legit suit, costs what, $25? to file? Those two things alone will open up an INS investigation on her. And with the Trail of Woe this stupid bitch has left behind, you KNOW there'll be plenty of other grounds as well.



Hmmm add her pot smoking into that (cuz I dont smoke, not that I actually care if she does)... good riddance evil bitch lady!
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 3:01:31 PM EDT
[#25]
Is there a garden in the backyard?
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 3:03:15 PM EDT
[#26]

Quoted:

Quoted:1-800-HELL0 I.N.S. or be prepared to have your name & credit damaged.


What are they gonna deport her for? She's lived here her whole life and has a kid in college?

Driving with a suspended license? How am I going to get her busted for that?



The INS makes the IRS look like the warm and fuzzy branch of the government ever since 9/11.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 3:14:16 PM EDT
[#27]

Quoted:
Is there a garden in the backyard?



NO! It's too cold and no way in hell I'd ever allow that anyways.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 3:27:01 PM EDT
[#28]
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 3:38:13 PM EDT
[#29]
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 3:39:49 PM EDT
[#30]

Quoted:
What you had better prepare for, is being put out of your home, while you still pay its rent, and you are likely to be slapped with a restraining order soon. IF you do not get yourself out of that situation you are likely to have a domestic violence conviction on your record as well. I have seen enogh of those daytime court shows to know where this is going. I know you are not guilty of any of those things, but the cops don't care, she is a woman, you are a man, the cops who have to deal with her may agre with you, and think she is off her rocker, but the way the laws work, all she has to do is make the accusations and you are guilty.



If I hadn't seen this same thing happen before to several good men I wouldn't believe it.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 11:03:45 PM EDT
[#31]
I can't just up and leave or I'll still be paying the rent. My name is on that lease too.

Update: After a rather long message to her in which I said more or less I have idea what you are talking about .Calm down and tell me what your problem is.

Her response was that she didn't want to be bothered about any issues when she got home at night and if I would just stop  talking to her when she got home she would be perfectly happy about everything...

... I still want to run but have nowhere to go...
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 11:06:27 PM EDT
[#32]
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 11:07:08 PM EDT
[#33]
Something aint right dude.

Do you have somewhere else you could go temporarily?

If so, get out of the lease, then shut all the utilities off and get the hell away from this woman.

Other option, have her repay you with oral sex.
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 11:23:12 PM EDT
[#34]
Punch out Maverick... PUNCH OUT!!!

Seriously... get away from her NOW!!! Break your lease, stay with friends or family, sacrifice what ever $$$ you have invested in the situation, etc...

Don't take this situation lightly... be proactive and get the fuck out of Dodge NOW!!!

This type of mentally disturbed individual will scuttle your life for sport & not even think twice about it.

You came to us seeking advice, and here it is... leave that situation as soon as humanly possible!  


Link Posted: 10/22/2004 11:26:40 PM EDT
[#35]
Get the free oral sex too!
Link Posted: 10/22/2004 11:51:12 PM EDT
[#36]
How about going to see a lawyer? Take any and all documents with you and get some legal help? Could it hurt?
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