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Posted: 9/12/2004 12:40:11 AM EDT
I was at the local mall today with the wife.
We stopped at the food court to eat Sbaarros pizza. We were in line behind this chubby guy, his fugly wife and his young son. He had on a nice clean white shirt that read: "Anyone but Bush" "4 years for Kerry" My wife poked me in the ribs and told me to keep my comments to myself. Mr. ABB took his pizza and sodas and went to sit down. On his way to his table he tripped and spilled his food. One of the slices of pizza landed right on the front of his shirt. Grease and pepperoni all over it. One of the sodas fell onto the floor and splashed back at him getting his pants wet. He stood there looking like he was going to cry. Before my wife could poke me in the ribs again I said to no one in particular in a kind of loud voice "typical Kerry supporter". 
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Posted: 9/12/2004 12:40:59 AM EDT
[#1]
Best thread of the day. Congrats!!!!!!!
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Posted: 9/12/2004 12:45:08 AM EDT
[#2]
*insert high-quality PWNED picture here* |
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Posted: 9/12/2004 12:46:17 AM EDT
[#3]
When i first started reading this thread, and then came to the end, all i could think was, this can't be true.
then i realized he was voting for kerry. |
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Posted: 9/12/2004 12:46:37 AM EDT
[#4]
 Man how come I never get to see stuff like this... I'd more than likely have nearly pissed myself laughing. |
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Posted: 9/12/2004 12:47:11 AM EDT
[#5]
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA
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Posted: 9/12/2004 12:49:39 AM EDT
[#6]
THANK YOU !! That story made my day  |
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Posted: 9/12/2004 1:57:43 AM EDT
[#7]
 Thanks. Put a smile on my face and warmed up my heart! |
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Posted: 9/12/2004 2:07:51 AM EDT
[#8]
For you......Christmas came early.
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Posted: 9/12/2004 2:12:35 AM EDT
[#9]
Gee! I wander how he'll react when sKerry loses?
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Posted: 9/12/2004 2:52:07 AM EDT
[#10]
Tagging this for when I have time to tell my "typical Kerry Supporter" story. It's a fucking doozy!!!
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Posted: 9/12/2004 5:53:36 AM EDT
[#11]
I WAS NOT ABOUT TO CRY....ASSHAT!!
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Posted: 9/12/2004 5:56:01 AM EDT
[#12]
Damn...something glorious like that almost makes believe in God...almost... |
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Posted: 9/12/2004 6:14:15 AM EDT
[#13]
I had to log in and tell my "typical Kerry supporter" story.
I work at one of those oak panneled, Starbucks spewing, plush chair having, bookstores (but in its defense, they hire Americans and put a huge emphasis on customer service) and I was walking from the back of the store to the front and this guy is in front of me. Old, stained t-shirt the color of dust with frayed old-looking cammie cut-offs, and a sun visor with a "Vets for Kerry" pin on it. But none of that is what made this guy stand out. He STANK. I don't mean caught a whiff as he walked by and it went away. I was walking 6-8 feet behind this guy and could smell him. It was that bad and I'm not exaggerating. The man smelled.  And all I could think was "typical Kerry supporter". |
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Posted: 9/12/2004 6:16:43 AM EDT
[#14]
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Posted: 9/12/2004 6:52:22 AM EDT
[#15]
fantastic!
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Posted: 9/12/2004 7:05:39 AM EDT
[#16]
I just love stories with happy endings........
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Posted: 9/12/2004 7:11:00 AM EDT
[#17]
That made my day
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Posted: 9/12/2004 7:11:52 AM EDT
[#18]
OWNED!
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Posted: 9/12/2004 7:13:39 AM EDT
[#19]
I saw a similar incident at work Friday. This dumbass tourist tripped while exiting a mass transit bus in Baltimore and fell to the sidewalk, resulting in skinned knees and hands and a broken camcorder. His Kerry shirt didn't save him at all! I guess you could say he "flip-flopped"...
 Yes, I laughed at him, and yes he clearly heard me!
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Posted: 9/12/2004 7:15:09 AM EDT
[#20]
Free blocks of cheese if Outhouse F'n sKerry gets elected
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Posted: 9/12/2004 7:24:16 AM EDT
[#21]
[nelson]Ha-Ha[/nelson]
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Posted: 9/12/2004 7:27:12 AM EDT
[#22]
A picture would have made this thread 10000% better..... but GREAT story |
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Posted: 9/12/2004 7:32:08 AM EDT
[#23]
That's great. Normally I feel bad for people who do shit like that, cause I know I would feel like an ass too, but I have no sympathy for ABB people.
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Posted: 9/12/2004 7:35:21 AM EDT
[#24]
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Posted: 9/12/2004 7:35:43 AM EDT
[#25]
I bet this person went back to the counter and demanded another soda and slice of pizza for FREE.
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Posted: 9/12/2004 7:39:01 AM EDT
[#26]
Four years of Bush didn't seem to have slimmed down Big Boy. In fact, he seems to have prospered during the period.
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Posted: 9/12/2004 7:45:45 AM EDT
[#27]
He'll probably sink into a deep depression, be unable to work (if he actually has a job), go to a shrink, get on disability, food stamps and welfare for the rest of his life (like most of my pawnshop customers) with you know who (read me and you) picking up the tab! |
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Posted: 9/12/2004 7:47:13 AM EDT
[#28]
Damn, if you had a camera, he'd BE the pwned picture. |
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Posted: 9/12/2004 7:52:05 AM EDT
[#29]
NICE
I yelled at a Kerry bumpersticker having fat bitch at the ATM the other day, she was trying to heave her fat ass out of the car window because she didn't pull in clost enough, and took about five minutes at the damn ATM... Typical idiot, err Democrat. |
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Posted: 9/12/2004 8:17:04 AM EDT
[#30]
Last week I was at Seatac waiting to board my flight to Newark I'm sittingwithmy back to the windows hangingout and reading a bit. I look up and there is a young fella clean cut but hippied out with his clothes, and bracelets drinking from a Nalgen bottle with a Kerry sticker on it. I chose that time to begin reading my American Handgunner magazine, holding it up in front of my face so he had no choice but to see it if he looked out of the windows.
Of course in the end he was one of those types who when they say the are boarding rows 24-29 he's online and by the time they get to my row 17 his ass is firmly planted in row 10. 
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Posted: 9/12/2004 8:21:18 AM EDT
[#31]
There is a reason for pocket digital cameras... don't leave home without one!
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Posted: 9/12/2004 8:23:36 AM EDT
[#32]
Talk about instant kharma
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Posted: 9/12/2004 3:21:18 PM EDT
[#34]
The guy took the stuff to his table, collected his wife and kid and left.
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Posted: 9/12/2004 9:42:34 PM EDT
[#35]
You should have said and in a very loud voice "Did you see what Dick Cheney did to that poor man? stole the food from his kid. Damn Republicans"
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Posted: 9/12/2004 9:52:04 PM EDT
[#36]
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Posted: 9/12/2004 10:38:14 PM EDT
[#37]
Thats hillarious! I wish I was there to see it. Whats up with the wives poking us in the ribs all the time anyway? My wife is ALWAYS trying to get me to keep my thoughts to myself when we are out in public. She knows me WELL.
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Posted: 9/12/2004 10:42:03 PM EDT
[#38]
I havent seen that many in my area, I also dont try to get out much.
I saw a John Kerry for Czar one the other day. |
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Posted: 9/12/2004 10:47:10 PM EDT
[#39]
Must have been a Bush conspiracy.
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Posted: 9/13/2004 12:19:44 AM EDT
[#40]
Now, a REAL Kerry-ite would have immediately filed suit against anybody, and then gone on TV to blame someone else for their own stupidity. But the fact that he was really an ABB, well, I suppose he just looked sheeple-ly around for someone to follow...
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