I have been smoking for about 30 years

Year 27: 2001
Realize smoking two packs of cigarettes a day is really stupid
Take the year telling yourself this.  (The beauty of this plan is you do it at your own pace)

Year 28: 2002
Switch from Marlboro to Winston and gain the benefits of not smoking strychnine,
chloroform, formaldehyde, rat shit, womens underware and whatever else they
throw in there to trap you. Now sit back and just enjoy that pure fine tobacco.
You now will feel some withdrawal symptoms especially from the womens underware.
Don't let this frighten you because it soon goes away. (And hell you're still smoking
two packs a day)

Year 29: 2003
Switch from regular Winstons to Winston Lights. Now here, you are really going to have
to fight the urge to take out your pocket knife and chopping off half the filter to get that full
body taste. You may need to quit carrying a knife. (But hell you are still smoking two packs a day)

Year 30: 2004
Now this is a big step, stop smoking in the house and get down to one pack a day. I know
I know, now you are truly frightened. But you have Grand kids coming over now and they
don't need this shit! "But if you have Grand kids then you must have had your own kids in
the house dealing with the smoke?". True, but I had to house them, clothe them and put up
with a lot of shit, the least they could do for me is put up with a little second hand smoke
the bastards, but my Grandchildren are innocent.

Right away you will notice that while posting on ARFcom you won't be squinting with one eye open
because of the smoke eye hits. This will encourage you right away, and I believe your posts will
reflect your determination. To achieve the one pack of smokes a day, you need to post, go outside to smoke, but here is the trick, only smoke half that baby and go back inside and see if anybody really
gave a shit about your topic or post. With your renewed lung capacity your rebuttals will be awesome
and will impress everyone on the board.

Year 31: 2005
"Ok, you're done poisoning your immediate family, what's next?" This is where things get
really tough, you quit them evil son of a bitches for good, and don't look back.

GM

<----41 days smoke-free. used my last 'patch' monday.

Or you could just get up one day, be pissed at all the money you're wasting and lung butter you're hacking up, toss your smokes in the toilet, and not smoke anymore. It works.

<-- 2 packs a day for 10 years, cold turkey since 9/01.

Quoted: <----41 days smoke-free. used my last 'patch' monday.

You must be on that one year plan.
You're scarying me man

GM

Quoted: Or you could just get up one day, be pissed at all the money you're wasting and lung butter you're hacking up, toss your smokes in the toilet, and not smoke anymore. It works. <-- 2 packs a day for 10 years, cold turkey since 9/01.

I think you're missing the whole concept of the 5 year plan

nothing like a good plan

Quoted: Quoted: Or you could just get up one day, be pissed at all the money you're wasting and lung butter you're hacking up, toss your smokes in the toilet, and not smoke anymore. It works. <-- 2 packs a day for 10 years, cold turkey since 9/01. I think you're missing the whole concept of the 5 year plan

I know, I know.. but that's a lot of ammo money going up in smoke. I SUCK at math, and even I could do that equation

three weeks smoke free here, only used orbit gum and sunflower seeds. so my lungs will be clean but I will have cavities from the gum and high blood pressure from the salt of the seeds. Ain't life grand?

Quoted: three weeks smoke free here, only used orbit gum and sunflower seeds. so my lungs will be clean but I will have cavities from the gum and high blood pressure from the salt of the seeds. Ain't life grand?

I say enjoy life.. that ten years they say you're losing.. them's the diaper years anyway. No loss.

Quoted: three weeks smoke free here, only used orbit gum and sunflower seeds. so my lungs will be clean but I will have cavities from the gum and high blood pressure from the salt of the seeds. Ain't life grand?

If you get tired of Orbit, try cinnamon Altoids. Sure, you'll have an ulcer in your mouth after two days, but the bright side is that severe pain in your mouth keeps you from eating so much.

Oh, and my plan started in 1997. I forgot to mention that part.

I did this post, tongue in cheek, and there seems to be not much humor for
smokers one way or another. Those that want to quit are serious and those that have never smoked
are serious about those that do.

GM

<-----  Smoke free since my birthday.


And I mean my very first birthday. Suckers.  

Quoted: <-----  Smoke free since my birthday. And I mean my very first birthday. Suckers.

Show Off    

Quoted: <----41 days smoke-free. used my last 'patch' monday.

congrats!!

<----- smoke free since 1990, best thing I ever did for my health ... I just quit cold turkey one day. My thinking was, I am young(I was 26) I can quit anytime. then I thought HOW STUPID IS THAT! I am young, NOW is the time to quit !  so I did ...... besides, what I was spending on cigarettes every month would pay my car payment .... I was smoking 2 to 3 packs of Marlboro reds per day ....

<I hate cigarettes so bad now it feels weird talking about when I used to smoke>