Uh, um, errrrr... (Damn, I REALLY can't think of a title for this one)

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Uh, um, errrrr... (Damn, I REALLY can't think of a title for this one) (Page 1 of 2)

Posted: 8/16/2004 2:07:06 PM EDT

www.mirror.co.uk/news/allnews/tm_objectid=14535279&method=full&siteid=50143&headline=prisoner-of-love-is-cut-free-name_page.html

PRISONER OF LOVE IS CUT FREE

Aug 16 2004
Jeremy Armstrong

A MAJOR rescue operation was launched after a man got a metal nut stuck on his manhood during a kinky sex game.

Fire crews, medical staff and even a dentist were involved in the delicate procedure to free it.

And it finally took a surgeon using the fire brigade's high-powered angle grinder two hours to get it off.

The rescue cost around £5,000 - because eight fire engines were needed to provide back-up power.

A Tyne and Wear fire spokesman said: "The last thing you want is your grinder going down on you on a job like that."

The man, in his 30s, had left the nut attached for two weeks. When he got to Sunderland Royal Infirmary, he was in agony.

A hospital source said: "His member had swollen to a remarkable size."

A dentist tried his small drills first, then three firemen had to don scrubs to assist the surgeon.

The man has now been told his part might be beyond surgical repair.

Posted: 8/16/2004 2:08:50 PM EDT

[#1]

Posted: 8/16/2004 2:10:09 PM EDT

[#2]

Sometimes you feel like a nut.

Posted: 8/16/2004 2:10:10 PM EDT

[#3]

ouch

Posted: 8/16/2004 2:11:06 PM EDT

[#4]

So, the robot is broken?

Posted: 8/16/2004 2:13:39 PM EDT

[#5]

You mean I might not get this thing off?

Posted: 8/16/2004 2:15:19 PM EDT

[#6]

Nut on his nuts?

CRC

Posted: 8/16/2004 2:20:35 PM EDT

[#7]

hmm, a case of metricitus, deadly

Posted: 8/16/2004 2:21:16 PM EDT

[#8]

There was a female comic on the radio here in LA who had a weekly segment dedicated to men doing stupid sexual stuff - cutting off their parts - getting their parts stuck inside things - getting things stuck inside their ass ... it's a wierd world. There's a point where you do something stupid, and then there's the point where you have to present your stupid event to someone for help - the least number possible. So you think how you're going to explain yourself to the doctor ... see I was doing some plumbing, it was hot, and there was this big nut sitting next to ... nahh that ain't gonna work.

Posted: 8/16/2004 2:24:44 PM EDT

[#9]

There is a sort of genetic justice involved if you lose your beloved member to a nutty idea.

Posted: 8/16/2004 2:26:05 PM EDT

[#10]

What some people will go through just to get a nut....

Posted: 8/16/2004 2:26:32 PM EDT

[#11]

Quoted:
Sometimes you feel like a nut.

Posted: 8/16/2004 2:27:03 PM EDT

[#12]

yet another example of why the theory of penis envy is untrue....

Posted: 8/16/2004 2:27:29 PM EDT

[#13]

Quoted:
There was a female comic on the radio here in LA who had a weekly segment dedicated to men doing stupid sexual stuff - cutting off their parts - getting their parts stuck inside things - getting things stuck inside their ass ... it's a wierd world. There's a point where you do something stupid, and then there's the point where you have to present your stupid event to someone for help - the least number possible. So you think how you're going to explain yourself to the doctor ... see I was doing some plumbing, it was hot, and there was this big nut sitting next to ... nahh that ain't gonna work.

When my wife was doing her residency in manhattan, during her ER rotation she owudl come home with the object of the day. Every day it woudl be something like a lightbulb, coke bottle, baby bottle and the like. She said that the person, sometimes man sometimes woman, woudl try to convince her that they "just sat on it" and whoops, there it is.

I miss those days, as they were the best comedy we ever saw live.

Posted: 8/16/2004 2:28:51 PM EDT

[#14]

that guy is nuts

Posted: 8/16/2004 2:29:03 PM EDT

[#15]

must have had course threads ....

Posted: 8/16/2004 2:29:03 PM EDT

[#16]

Pics?

Posted: 8/16/2004 2:31:39 PM EDT

[#17]

Quoted:
that guy is f@cking nuts

Fixed it for ya.

Posted: 8/16/2004 2:31:58 PM EDT

[#18]

I can't believe the stupidity of some people! To be dumb enough to get it stuck in the first place, and then leaving it on for two weeks

Serves him right if it ends up being beyond surgical repair, we will all be fortuante that this guy can't take a dump in the gene pool!

I think this calls for the stamp of approval:

Posted: 8/16/2004 2:32:33 PM EDT

[#19]

Quoted:
When my wife was doing her residency in manhattan, during her ER rotation she owudl come home with the object of the day. Every day it woudl be something like a lightbulb, coke bottle, baby bottle and the like. She said that the person, sometimes man sometimes woman, woudl try to convince her that they "just sat on it" and whoops, there it is.

I miss those days, as they were the best comedy we ever saw live.

"Just sat on it"

WTF were those people thinking?

Nevermind...I don't think I wanna know

Posted: 8/16/2004 2:36:02 PM EDT

[#20]

Quoted:

A hospital source said: "His member had swollen to a remarkable size."

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Posted: 8/16/2004 3:13:30 PM EDT

[#21]

I'ver personally seen an X-ray of a maglite in the ass. Whole thing was up there.....

Posted: 8/16/2004 3:15:24 PM EDT

[#22]

Quoted:
Quoted:
that guy is f@cking nuts

Fixed it for ya.

god i'm slipping. how did i miss that?

Posted: 8/16/2004 3:18:53 PM EDT

[#23]

Hold my beer and watch this!

Posted: 8/16/2004 3:23:31 PM EDT

[#24]

Quoted:
Quoted:
that guy is f@cking nuts

Fixed it for ya.

WINNER!

Posted: 8/16/2004 3:25:56 PM EDT

[#25]

you have no idea how common this kind of shit really is. When i was on the FD we used to get 3-4 kinky sex calls a month.

mike

Posted: 8/16/2004 3:29:19 PM EDT

[#26]

I don't want to ask how he got it on there.

Posted: 8/16/2004 3:29:40 PM EDT

[#27]

Quoted:
Sometimes you feel like a nut.

Good one, Hound.

Posted: 8/16/2004 3:41:41 PM EDT

[#28]

Quoted:
I'ver personally seen an X-ray of a maglite in the ass. Whole thing was up there.....

Just how kinky was this freak, two, three or four cell??...

Posted: 8/16/2004 3:45:36 PM EDT

[#29]

Another Limey attempts to thread an SAE nut on a BSW bolt...

Posted: 8/16/2004 3:49:29 PM EDT

[#30]

OK, I guess I have no imagination. What the hell was this fruitcake trying to do?

Posted: 8/16/2004 3:53:13 PM EDT

[#31]

Soooooooooo.....I wonder if he ever got his nut off?

Posted: 8/16/2004 3:56:09 PM EDT

[#32]

"Franks and beans!"

Posted: 8/16/2004 3:56:40 PM EDT

[#33]

Quoted:
When i was on the FD we used to get 3-4 kinky sex calls a month.

mike

Note to self: join fire department

Posted: 8/16/2004 3:58:16 PM EDT

[#34]

WTF IS UP WTS ?

Posted: 8/16/2004 4:04:55 PM EDT

[#35]

He should have used a neoprene O-ring.

And never leave it on longer than 20 minutes.

Posted: 8/16/2004 4:05:38 PM EDT

[#36]

When they are using that angle grinder, how hot do you suppose the metal is going to get?

Posted: 8/16/2004 4:06:48 PM EDT

[#37]

heh trying to use a nut like a cock ring. what a dumbass.

Posted: 8/16/2004 4:06:49 PM EDT

[#38]

Quoted:
that guy is nuts

It's all he's got left now!

Posted: 8/16/2004 4:08:18 PM EDT

[#39]

Quoted:
He should have used a neoprene O-ring.

And never leave it on longer than 20 minutes.

Is this supposed to be the poor man's viagra?

Posted: 8/16/2004 4:08:48 PM EDT

[#40]

Quoted:
Quoted:
When i was on the FD we used to get 3-4 kinky sex calls a month.

mike

Note to self: join fire department

Been there, and no you dont want to go there.

My personal favorite was the x-ray I got to see of a light bulb where the sun isn't supposed to shine.

Posted: 8/16/2004 4:11:39 PM EDT

[#41]

and in the end he finally busted a nut.

Posted: 8/16/2004 4:14:08 PM EDT

[#42]

Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
When i was on the FD we used to get 3-4 kinky sex calls a month.

mike

Note to self: join fire department

Been there, and no you dont want to go there.

My personal favorite was the x-ray I got to see of a light bulb where the sun isn't supposed to shine.

www.well.com/www/cynsa/bulb.html

Posted: 8/16/2004 5:24:38 PM EDT

[#43]

Quoted:

My personal favorite was the x-ray I got to see of a light bulb where the sun isn't supposed to shine.

A friend of mine, who is an anesthesiologist, was summoned to attend as a lightbulb was removed from a man's rectum.

I have done many stupid things, but . . . .

Posted: 8/16/2004 6:08:38 PM EDT

[#44]

Quoted:
He should have used a neoprene O-ring.

And never leave it on longer than 20 minutes.

Ahhh, and how did you obtain this information?

Vulcan94

Posted: 8/16/2004 6:22:22 PM EDT

[#45]

I worked vice for 5 years, and I feel I'm qualified to say:

This is mild. Most of my stories are not for mixed company. Like the guy that paid hookers to scratch him with those glue on fake vampire nails until he bled, or the guy that liked to masturbate with steel wool and sent a videotape to his Ex after slicing grooves in his penis with a razor blade.

Then there was the stockboy doing chickens in the supermarket at night and then putting them back in the meat case.

Posted: 8/16/2004 6:23:40 PM EDT

[#46]

Dayum. The light-bulb thing would happen in West Virginia, wouldn't it?

You know, I'm not sure if this increases my desire to become an emergency doctor (because I would get to laugh at the dumbasses who do this shit) or lessens it (because I want to be able to sleep at night and pulling lightbulbs out of people's asses doesn't help that).

You know, maybe some people do this as a magic trick. "Hey, watch me pull a tennis ball out of my ass! Just... a... little... further... uh oh..."

Posted: 8/16/2004 6:25:04 PM EDT

[#47]

Posted: 8/16/2004 6:30:37 PM EDT

[#48]

Ah, those brits!

They should've used a deep-socket and a pneumatic wrench and just
"screwed" it off!

Then, he'd have threads so next time he needs to put it on, he can
use a 12 inch wrench and screw it back on!