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Posted: 8/13/2004 11:21:36 AM EDT
Ohhh, wow!!!! Another 6 dollar and fifty cent lesson on why I hate sequals....
I don't know where the hell to begin.....let's see....I bet the producers of this film just sat around for weeks trying to figure out ways to just PISS ME OFF!!! Producer 1: Hey, I've got a great idea! Ya know that desertmoon guy who really pisses us off? Producer 2: Oh, yeah...I hate that guy....what do you wanna do to spoil his fun this time. Producer 1: Oh, I've got a grand idea. Let's take the characters from two of his favorite films and have them battle it out in the lamest sequal we can make....you know he won't be able to resist...even though he knows it will suck. Producer 2: Oh wait...this is even better....how about if we ALMOST make it good. For instance, what if we set it up in some absurd fashion that makes it sound bad... Producer 1: you mean like Earth? Producer 2: Yeah! But then we make the story line seem that it actually might do something cool, like explain the disappearance of the dinosaurs...or early advanced cultures....and then Producer 1: ...we make it ALMOST follow all of the rules of both sets of creatures....so it's almost cool!! Producer 2: YESSSSS...NOW you've got the hang of it!!! Producer 1: ohhhh are we gonna piss this guy off...even though he'll be prepared for suckiness....we're gonna sucker punch him a good one...right to the kidneys! Producer 2: KISS ME, YOU FIEND!!!! There, that's what happened...I bet ya!!!! Take two great concepts and then ALMOST do something with them...but not quite...then every now and then just depart from the natural order of things completely just to make me really mad so that I keep using words like "just" and "then" repetatively, like I am a stutterer..... In the immortal words of Charlie Brown...."Good grief!" 
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Posted: 8/13/2004 11:26:04 AM EDT
[#1]
I haven't seen it yet. I was hoping for something good, but expecting something horrible.
Huge fan of Aliens and Alien. The Predator movies are also good ones. Oh well, I guess I'll save my money and wait for it to come out on DVD. |
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Posted: 8/13/2004 11:29:10 AM EDT
[#2]
I heard this flicks suxx so bad, they're trying to keep a lid on the bad reviews and hope to get just one good week out of it. Kinda like "The Village".
It was a bad sign when they cancelled the Hollywood premier. CKMorley |
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Posted: 8/13/2004 11:29:37 AM EDT
[#3]
I'm not expecting a "good" movie, just special effects eye-candy.
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Posted: 8/13/2004 11:47:57 AM EDT
[#4]
Oh, you'll get that.....and a healthy case of tooth decay to boot! |
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Posted: 8/13/2004 11:50:51 AM EDT
[#5]
At least they didnt use Sigourney Weaver to play Ripley's great-great-great-great-great-grandmother.
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Posted: 8/13/2004 11:53:07 AM EDT
[#6]
Yummmmmm - Sigourney Weaver in her underwear.....<sigh>. |
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Posted: 8/13/2004 11:54:20 AM EDT
[#7]
I saw a "makeing of" while flipping through channels last night; I figured that it was going to suck like a Hoover just from this type of hype.
Thanks for the warning. |
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Posted: 8/13/2004 12:01:39 PM EDT
[#8]
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Posted: 8/13/2004 12:04:32 PM EDT
[#9]
Be afraid....be very afraid...
OF WASTING YOUR GODDAMN MONEY!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
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Posted: 8/13/2004 12:08:58 PM EDT
[#10]
So should I even bother to download it from WinMX?
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Posted: 8/13/2004 12:13:29 PM EDT
[#11]
Oh God... this is going to be BAD....
www.rottentomatoes.com/m/alien_vs_predator/ ETA: One of the forum posters dubs it "The New "Battlefield Earth".  
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Posted: 8/13/2004 12:22:13 PM EDT
[#12]
Two word: Paul Anderson.
Just for those not in the know, that's the same Paul Anderson who brought us such gems as Mortal Combat, Event Horizon, and Resident Evil. |
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Posted: 8/13/2004 12:51:27 PM EDT
[#13]
wait, hold on . what was wrong with resident evil?
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Posted: 8/13/2004 12:52:59 PM EDT
[#14]
I liked it, but whats up with the name Raccoon City? |
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Posted: 8/13/2004 12:53:49 PM EDT
[#15]
Oh come on. The movie was crap. Entertaining, but crap. |
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Posted: 8/13/2004 12:55:30 PM EDT
[#16]
The Japanese have a thing for raccoons. And teens in sailor suits. And tentacle rape. |
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Posted: 8/13/2004 1:01:40 PM EDT
[#17]
Uh, don't we all? |
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Posted: 8/13/2004 1:06:23 PM EDT
[#18]
good movie, the next one will be even better.
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Posted: 8/13/2004 1:09:40 PM EDT
[#19]
i may just pass on this one
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Posted: 8/13/2004 1:16:19 PM EDT
[#20]
dont do it. its another chance to see mila, mmmmmmm.
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Posted: 8/13/2004 1:53:33 PM EDT
[#21]
most entertaining review I have read in a while, desertmoon. You should replace the fat guy.
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Posted: 8/13/2004 2:11:04 PM EDT
[#22]
ill wait for a torrent. |
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Posted: 8/13/2004 2:17:49 PM EDT
[#23]
if your a fan of the games like I was the movie was crap. |
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Posted: 8/13/2004 2:32:55 PM EDT
[#24]
Im still going to see it tomorrow......
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Posted: 8/13/2004 2:59:25 PM EDT
[#25]
... Yeah desertmoon, I saw you in the theater and was going to holler at you!
... But I noticed you were open-carrying like me and I didn't want to jeopardize getting us kicked out by the AMC staff and Mesa PD like some other familiar looking fellows did at the movie that night. 
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Posted: 8/13/2004 3:04:41 PM EDT
[#26]
I saw the previews in the theatre a few weeks ago .......
My thoughts after watching the preview , was that it would be the $5.50 DVD bin at Wally world in about a month  |
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Posted: 8/13/2004 4:16:57 PM EDT
[#27]
I've been waiting for this movie since reading the AvP comic series 15 years ago. It kept very true to the ideas put forth in that series (and the movies) and I loved it. I'd go more into it but I'd have to put spoilers then. And it has a pro gun message too.
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Posted: 8/13/2004 8:56:41 PM EDT
[#28]
I like the way ya think .  |
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Posted: 8/13/2004 9:15:55 PM EDT
[#29]
Jesus christ, that was bad.
I was giving it allot of breathing room and enjoying myself untill the predator and the human formed an alliance. From that point on it was total absolute crap. What the fuck was FOX thinking when they hired the director? Matrix slo mo on the face huggers while having the camera rotate around them? Chest bursters in thirty minutes? I gave them that, but when the predator formed the alliance and gave the chick a ALIEN HEAD for a sheild and had them running from explosions together that was too fing much. Fuck you FOX. You deserve every bit of crap you get for hiring such a movie-fucker as Paul. Die. |
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Posted: 8/13/2004 9:22:00 PM EDT
[#30]
 movie sucked otherwise
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Posted: 8/13/2004 9:24:34 PM EDT
[#31]
Event Horizon was almost a decent movie. Except it wasn't. For a lot of what desertmoon said - good concept he ALMOST did something with. Same with Resident Evil. A big, go-nowhere let-down. I think I'll skip AVP. |
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Posted: 8/13/2004 9:27:45 PM EDT
[#32]
What is everyone's beef with Resident Evil? That movie was awsome, and the second looks kick ass.
I guess noone here is video game buff? 
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Posted: 8/13/2004 9:34:43 PM EDT
[#33]
Havent you heard of the "Seperation of Movie and Video game"? Its in the Constitution I think. |
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Posted: 8/13/2004 11:11:09 PM EDT
[#34]
Hmm, maybe I'll actually like AvP since I liked Event Horizon, Resident Evil, and even Battlefield Earth??? {/starts ducking the incoming rotten vegetables....}
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Posted: 8/13/2004 11:21:41 PM EDT
[#35]
Oh God, you've never seen Mortal Kombat?!?!? You owe it to yourself man, it's so terrible its funny. You'd be hard pressed to find a cornier movie. I guess it's a little self inflicted pain, but it's amusing. |
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Posted: 8/13/2004 11:28:18 PM EDT
[#36]
I'm a huge Aliens fan, and while I liked it, I didn't love it. It could have been way better than it was, but they had to go and screw it up. I was going to give Paul Anderson a chance, but he's relegated to suck status with me now.
They reused the molds from Alien 4 to make the alien suits for AVP. It was a horrible move, because they look like absolute crap and almost nothing like the original designs from the first three movies. The effects and fights were great however. The 30 minutes to adult alien thing was a huge flaw and was just stupid. I didn't like the environmentalist hippie chick at all. Won't ruin the rest, but they took a lot of wrong turns with this project. |
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Posted: 8/14/2004 12:25:54 AM EDT
[#37]
Their taste in combat handguns were HORRIBLE. A Desert Eagle and what looked like a Beretta 96 Elite?!?
At least they made it up with some G36C's. |
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Posted: 8/14/2004 12:38:40 AM EDT
[#38]
BLASPHEMY! Battlefield Earth was THE WORST MOVIE OF ALL TIME AND NO OTHER MOVIE COULD POSSIBLY BE AS BAD. AvP was okay. It was about as good as Resident Evil or Event Horizon. You will like the movie while watching it, and only start to bitch and complain when it's over and you try to think about it. 
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Posted: 8/14/2004 1:24:00 AM EDT
[#39]
The Predator/human thing is pretty much right out of the old series except that when the human kills an alien in the comic he burns an imprint from its finger onto her forehead instead of her cheek. I think that that situation showed how honor and the thrill of the hunt are more important to the Predators than just killing a human just because its there. I liked how they showed the face huggers in slow mo...lots of people have never seen the first alien movies and have no idea wtf those things are or how they infect something with a chest burster.
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Posted: 8/14/2004 1:31:46 AM EDT
[#40]
I knew it would suck. I'll wiat for the 99 cent movie.
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Posted: 8/14/2004 2:16:19 AM EDT
[#41]
There arent even previews here yet...I only saw 1 poster for it in the cinemas yesterday...
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Posted: 8/14/2004 3:52:44 AM EDT
[#42]
All I'm going to say is thank God I got into the movie for free.
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Posted: 8/14/2004 3:56:44 AM EDT
[#43]
Were you taking freebies on the job Wave? Bad LEO, no doughnut!
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Posted: 8/14/2004 3:57:54 AM EDT
[#44]
Ah...the infamous bathroom scene, I just checked it out and it was good. |
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Posted: 8/14/2004 4:05:57 AM EDT
[#45]
Producer: "Let's wait until he has seen about 30 minutes of the movie, then have the police throw him out for having a gun."  
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Posted: 8/14/2004 4:05:59 AM EDT
[#46]
[PimpModeOn]No, I had the chick pay. |
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Posted: 8/14/2004 4:10:34 AM EDT
[#47]
Must be nice playa like you |
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Posted: 8/14/2004 4:12:14 AM EDT
[#48]
Hey, how come our hero's hand didn't melt off when she put on that shield?
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Posted: 8/14/2004 4:14:14 AM EDT
[#49]
You Da MAN! |
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Posted: 8/14/2004 4:28:57 AM EDT
[#50]
I enjoyed it.
I thought they did a good job of integrating the 2 franchises |
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