Dear god.  Worthless neighbors are awful.

For the TLDR crowd: I've been working with the neighbor for 8 months or so with their dog running over onto our property and barking constantly at us.  This morning at 5:42 AM I finally broke out a .22 starter pistol to get it to go the fuck home.  Now starting to contemplate trip mines setting off shotgun primers or something.

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Satellite picture was during construction in and around the shed.

Long version: Neighbor to the north got a puppy 9 months ago.  Adorable golden retriever.  Since we're in the country, they don't really mind when it runs free.  Several dogs in the neighborhood do it.  Personally, I wouldn't mind if the dog was friendly or if I had no livestock for it to harass.

But this dog comes onto our property nearly daily, almost every time you go outside, and barks loudly at us non-stop.  If you talk nice to her, doesn't matter.  If you approach her, doesn't matter she runs away and stays 60 feet away at all times.  If you yell "GET" she'll run away 10 feet.  The neighbors come out and do the "oh we're sorry" routine every time.  Nothing ever changes.

I've offered to help them train her.  I've helped them try to figure out how to use their shock collar.  Etc.

About 1.5 months ago, my 3 year old daughter and I were organizing the shed.  The dog came crashing through the woods and scared the shit out of her.  She immediately wanted to go back inside and the next day said she didn't want to go outside because she was scared of the dog.  This was the tipping point where I went from friendly neighbor to "you guys have to do something about this shit".  My kid is not a scared kid, nor scared of dogs.  This dog isn't even a mean one.  She's just a bored Golden Retriever pup that sounds aggressive.

Daughter with our GSD:


So I started toying with the idea of having to get a pellet gun, BB gun, paintball gun, etc.  I looked into motion sensing ultrasonic speakers that would sense the movement and scare the dog away, none of them got good enough reviews.  I thought about motion sensing sprinkler systems, if they even exist.

But then after a more aggressive message sent to the owner, we stopped seeing her.  A month went by and things seemed like they had gotten better.  I thought they had gotten the picture.

Then last week, Saturday at 8 AM, she wakes up the whole house with her barking.  8 AM wasn't too terribly bad so I didn't really give a shit.  We almost felt thankful that she got us out of bed with our blood boiling.  It made us get more things done on Saturday.  That day I was outside yelling at her to go home and heard the neighbor doing the same "Come here girl, come on" that never works.

Then today... after being awake until 3 AM doing work... the dog comes over to our house and starts barking at our dogs at 5:30 AM.  She wakes the whole house up.  Me, my wife, 10 month old son, 3 year old daughter.  I went outside with a .22 starter pistol and fired a shot 30 degrees off from where the dog was so that the bullet can't hit the pup, but the loud noise will still be directed towards her.  She got the picture and left without another peep.

I walked over to the owner who was in his garage (who hates this dog btw).  He gave me the same "oh sorry" speech I've heard a thousand times and I told him to stop saying that because it was empty.  If they weren't doing anything to stop the damn dog, nobody is ACTUALLY sorry.

Long conversation short, he promised (again) to fix it.  He said if it was up to him he'd just shoot the dog, but it's really the wife and kids'.  I told him if he needed me to come over to help him build a fence for a day, I'm in.  Whatever gets this to end.  If he needed me to use @Joker1 to get this dog who COULD be awesome rehomed, I'll help.  Etc.

Well... I don't trust them to fix this.  So I want to.

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CONCEPTUALIZING

The best plan I can currently come up with is to set up some kind of system to make the dog scared to set foot on our property OR to make it such a pain in the ass if it DOES step on the property that the owners will be compelled to fix the problem.  At this time, the easy thing for them to do is let the dog out, let it shit wherever it wants, and just let it back in.

So I see two basic solutions at the moment that utilize the choke point path that the dog currently takes every time:

1)  Trip wire system that has a loud CRACK sound that will scare the dog away like the 22 did.  I have the ability to make a system that holds shotgun primers for example and might be able to make it work like a revolver.  Keep in mind this is in a brush area, so I'd have to contain it completely.  This will be loud near them.  I'm fine with it waking them up every time the dog walks over.  However I am worried about it going off every time a deer comes through.  Since I have no idea how often deer travel this specific path, I don't know if it'll pop off 10 times for deer for every one time for the dog.

2)  A nasty ass tar pit or something that the dog will walk through every time it comes on to the property.  This way, every time it comes over, it comes back to them covered in nasty shit that gets trekked back onto their deck and maybe house and makes them want to control their pest.

Consider this a build thread unless they disappoint you all and actually control their dog.

Fence charger and strand of wire about chest high on the dog.  Dog will be headed for the next county before you know it.

You are much nicer than me.  

'If your dog comes onto my property acting aggressive I will kill it and toss the carcass onto your front porch"

La Brea Dog pits ?

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I would look at paintball stores, those guys have paint claymores and other nerd shit that would work well.

This will probably be the easiest solution that I end up going with.  Especially since I need a fence charger at some point anyway.

Interlapping, nonlethal, fields of fire:



They call it the yard enforcer

https://www.homedepot.com/p/Orbit-Yard-Enforcer-Motion-Activated-Pest-Deterrent-Sprinkler-62100/203907475

A starter pistol normally does not fire a projectile

I use M17 grenade fuzes with 209 primers. But, with the weirdness going on now, the fuzes are probably easier to find than the primers!

Sounds like Dad is ok with you shooting it.  Talk to him about it, warn his wife, then shoot it.  

Dumb situation.  Dumb that the Dad isn't doing squat.

Maybe he meant like it was a first pistol for his kid, not like a blank firing pistol for sporting events

I’d go the paintball gun route

It has a bark that sounds aggressive to a 3 year old kid.  It's not an aggressive dog.  Not yet, anyway.  It comes over and looks at the chickens sometimes through the fence.  Never shown any aggression towards anything.  It's just a bored pup.  

If it shows any aggression, it'll be gone.  The owner has only ever had hunting dogs, so he would have no problems just shooting it.  I told him that if it was ever in the chicken fence and hurt even one chicken, I have a shotgun sitting by the door specifically for chicken nuisances.  He didn't care at all, almost felt like I'd be doing him a favor.  But the family would be devastated.

But would they be devastated enough to take the steps to actually prevent it from happening now?  Certainly doesn't seem like it!

It is at least a blessing that the dad completely understands.  He and I are similar.  We both have businesses to run, we're both constantly working.  We don't have time to deal with this shit.  But he also knows that because he doesn't have time it doesn't mean that he can default to making ME have to deal with it.

And... I should have put this in the OP.  I'm pretty sure the mom has a terminal cancer.  I've HEARD that she got this dog so that her kids remember her from it.

I have no idea if that's true.  And it breaks my heart... but I also don't give a shit if it's going to be this way.

I'm ignorant.  It was my dad's first pistol.  It's a snubnosed .22LR.  I figured they just used blanks when used as a "starter pistol", but what you say makes more sense.  

If you can get close enough to it Spray him with mace/pepper spray.

Set up a live trap capture it take the dog 3 counties over to animal control

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I guess my next fear after such a thing would be that the kids HATE me for shooting their dog.  And the mom encourages it.  And they start fucking with my equipment.

The day after I sent the "this shit has gone too far" text, my tractor wouldn't run right.  I was certain that somebody had fucked with it, maybe sugar in the fuel tank.  But I had also just done a lot of maintenance on it and found out that I just hadn't closed the fuel primer all the way.

I'd prefer to fix the situation by still letting them love and keep their playful, cute pup.

The possibilities are.......tingly....

I... um... I don't know what I said wrong there.

Snubnose .22LR is *NOT* a starter pistol,  no matter what your intended use.




Electric fence is your best option, because it doesn't require oversight.  You'll likely need a tall and short strand so the dog doesn't jump or crawl over it.

https://fithops.com/

Well that's cool.

Maybe talk to the woman and tell her what is going on? Goldens usually aren’t mean dogs at least. It would suck to have to kill it. Your neighbors need a fence or put it on a lead while it is outside.

call the dog catcher. make them pay to get the dog back

Hotwire probably easiest thing to set up and make an actual defined property line.

Set up game cameras so you can record the dog bith before and after.   Then post here for lulz.

A trip mine with pepper spray would be bad ass.

Got a 3D printer or friends with 3D printers?

Deploy them like game cameras with a warning.

Could potentially drive them with an RC transmitter setup so it is not automated but rather manually set off.

Wait for dog to come up for a nice investigatory sniff and give it a snout full.

A part of me fully expects a Golden Retriever to LOVE this and want to come over more often to play with it.

This already failed as I sent the GSD after her one day.  She was scared shitless, but then the GSD just chilled out and the pup played with her.

Then the next time I released our pit mix who is actually aggressive against dogs.  The Goldie was too fast for him to catch so he switched from "KILL!" to "PLAY!"

The little bitch is foiling all of my plans.

I understand that I was wrong about what a starter pistol is or isn't.

Ignorant completely on that until now.  Got it.  

Most have at least a partially blocked barrel to develop enough back pressure to cycle an auto pistol.
Revolvers have a solid barrel.
No need for back pressure.

Cover it in molasses

I'm imaging a molasses brush system like a carwash inside the rosebush tunnel she comes through.  That'd be epic.

Step 1) Tell your neighbor you hope he enjoys cleaning liquid shit off all his carpets and furniture because you’re going to feed his dog hotdogs loaded up with laxatives the next time it comes over to your place.

Step 2) Do it.

Step 3) There is no step 3... that’s how easy this plan is.

Have the guy put the dog on a leash and bring it to your house for a few days . Feed it, pet it, walk the dog on it's leash until it gets used to you and your family. Quasi adopt it, or shoot it in it's fucking head if it doesn't stop.

I had a dog do that to my family years ago, one day I went outside and antagonized it into a lather. I took my 357 revolver loaded with blanks and unloaded on the dog, it took off never to be seen again. I think it might of died of a heart attack in the woods.

We've done that already, too.

It didn't make any difference.

I've sat outside with my back turned to this dog for 30 minutes to try to make it feel less challenged.  It just barked the whole time.

I'm at the end of the rope for tricks.

I even offered the 11 year old kid to bring the dog over so I could teach him how to train it, because he's also bored as fuck and I know that there are many extremely valuable lessons within learning to train a dog.  Before they got the dog, that kid was the neighborhood problem.  He'd wander around the neighborhood and find someone to stick around.  I was doing shuttle work moving dirt on my backhoe one day and the idiot was all of a sudden standing 10 feet behind the tractor.  I'm lucky I checked thoroughly behind me or I would have crushed him.

One time my zero turn John Deere was broken down on my trail.  It was on a slight incline.  I went down a few days later to drag it up with the tractor and the parking brake was off and the zero turn had rolled back into the woods.  I can't imagine any animal doing that.  And I certainly don't think I'd forget to set the parking brake since it's something I always do.  But it is possible I had left it off because it was only left there because the hill was too wet to make it all the way up towing the weight.  So it's possible I forgot.  

But then the next week something had turned the lights on for that same mower.  Could have been a squirrel jumping around on the controls.... but these things add up over time.

The whole family is just... /sigh.

@MaverickH1  Maybe some Horticulture Warfare (something with thorns like holly) or a fence on your side of the property?  Put a gate in where you need it.  

Paintball gun ambush.  Ideally, sit somewhere so you have a good field of fire where the dog has to run past you to get home, and you can put 50 or more into it.  

I've done this a couple of times, and it makes a BIG impression on the dog.

Why not just put a fence up yourself?

If I had a son or daughter who was afraid of going outside because of a dangerous dog, I'd tell the neighbor one more time and I'll show them where to put the flowers.

The basic philosophy of country living is, my animals go onto you property if they're hurt of killed it's my fault.  Your animals get off your property and come onto mine, whatever happens is on you.

Longer term, that area will likely be fenced off for goats to convert the shitty underbrush of the property into something more friendly for any other type of livestock.  I was hoping to do that this winter, but finances don't seem to be lining up for that project at the moment.

The pup already goes through rosebushes to get here.

And I don't want to give it an obstacle to simply go around.  I want that dog to stay coming through that one spot so I can do whatever solution is best for it.  Ideally... it'd be nice if it thought there was something magical and traumatizing about stepping into my woods.  That's essentially what underground fences train dogs to think about a location.

There are non-lethal shotgun shell tripwire thingies out there.  Apparently not that hard to make either.

https://www.guns.com/news/2017/09/05/going-the-distance-with-a-12-ga-perimeter-tripwire-device-video

Legally you are probably best off shooting it in the actual act of killing or trying to kill chickens. Check your local laws.

2 options….

1.Shoot the dog then walk over to it and open its mouth.Drag your arm across its teeth just enough to break your skin and cause you to bleed.
Now it will be obvious the dog attacked you and it was self defense.
2.Every time the dog comes over throw it a piece of meat until you 2 are buddies and he will come up to you.Once this is accomplished you can introduce your new buddy to the joys of riding in a car to the other side of the county.

No need for Rube Goldberg type solutions. Get an electric fence, should solve the problem easily and cheaply.

I'd like to see the result if you slipped a short length of blackpipe over the open shell.

OR, load your own blank full to the crimp!

My dogs would fucking love that,

Somebody said above fence charger will work

TLDR wall of text. Fuck it. If it is on my property in aggressive stance, it will taste best millimeter.

This. We had problems with neighbors dogs a while back. I set up an electric fence that plugs into a wall socket. You touch it and get one hell of a jolt.

Neighbors dog got near it and started sniffing it. When he touched it with his nose and it hit the pulse cycle, he yelped like he had been shot. Went hauling ass home and we haven't seen him since.

Neighbor asked how we got him to stay back. I said "Electric fence" His eyes got big and started to get huffed up. Reminded him that we had talked numerous times about him keeping his dog home.
He turned and left. He finally put a really nice tall privacy fence up all the way around his 3/4 acre back yard.

this!

you had me at claymore


I got 2 racoons that have been a pain in my side for weeks



bright orange racoons would have the hill billys going wtf