User Panel
User Panel
User Panel
|
Posted: 8/23/2017 1:21:43 AM EDT
[#1]
What's the first thing a blonde does in the morning?
A. She puts her clothes on and goes home. |
|
|
|
Posted: 8/23/2017 1:22:48 AM EDT
[#2]
Nice... Is your wife blonde?
|
|
|
|
Posted: 8/23/2017 1:23:50 AM EDT
[#3]
Two golfers were playing a round when they noticed a funeral procession driving by the golf course.
One of the golfers got out of the cart, stood up straight, removed his hat and placed if over his heart. "Wow" said the other golfer, "I've never seen someone show that much respect before." "Well, replied the other golfer, "We were married for almost 30 years." |
|
|
|
Posted: 8/23/2017 1:25:14 AM EDT
[#4]
Oh, i like that. Near lol...probably a true atory
|
|
|
|
Posted: 8/23/2017 1:26:33 AM EDT
[#5]
Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed fifty people - then it exploded.
|
|
|
|
Posted: 8/23/2017 1:27:24 AM EDT
[#6]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed fifty people - then it exploded. |
|
|
|
Posted: 8/23/2017 1:29:16 AM EDT
[#7]
The barman says, “We don’t serve time travelers in here.”
A time traveler walks into a bar. |
|
|
|
Posted: 8/23/2017 1:29:25 AM EDT
[#8]
Do you know why the streets of Paris are treelined?
The Germans like to march in the shade... |
|
|
|
Posted: 8/23/2017 1:29:56 AM EDT
[#9]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
The barman says, “We don’t serve time travelers in here.” A time traveler walks into a bar. |
|
|
|
Posted: 8/23/2017 1:36:02 AM EDT
[#10]
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day.
Okay, I'm out. |
|
|
|
Posted: 8/23/2017 1:41:24 AM EDT
[#11]
|
|
|
|
Posted: 8/23/2017 1:47:19 AM EDT
[#12]
I got nothing for ya, except I share your condition.
|
|
|
|
Posted: 8/23/2017 2:12:05 AM EDT
[#13]
A crusty old Marine Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by a local liberal arts college.
There was no shortage of extremely young idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant Major for conversation. "Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man. Is something bothering you?" "Negative, ma'am. Just serious by nature." The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, "It looks like you have seen a lot of action." "Yes, ma'am, a lot of action." The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, "You know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy yourself." The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner. Finally the young lady said, "You know, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but when is the last time you had sex?" "1955, ma'am." "Well, there you are. No wonder you're so serious. You really need to chill out! I mean, no sex since 1955! She took his hand and led him to a private room where she proceeded to "relax" him several times. Afterwards, panting for breath, she leaned against him and said, "Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955." The Sergeant Major said, after glancing at his watch, "I hope not; it's only 2130 now." |
|
|
|
Posted: 8/23/2017 2:14:07 AM EDT
[#14]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day. Okay, I'm out.  I like that one
|
|
|
|
Posted: 8/23/2017 2:21:02 AM EDT
[#15]
Some funny.
 Attached FileSome awesome.  Attached FileSome funny and awesome.  Attached FileAnd just to blow your mind clear out to Saturn. Incidentally OP, where is FM? |
|
|
|
Posted: 8/23/2017 4:54:36 AM EDT
[#16]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed fifty people - then it exploded. |
|
|
|
Posted: 8/23/2017 6:39:20 AM EDT
[#17]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Some funny. https://www.AR15.Com/media/mediaFiles/383325/image-288037.JPG Some awesome. https://www.AR15.Com/media/mediaFiles/383325/image-288038.JPG Some funny and awesome. https://www.AR15.Com/media/mediaFiles/383325/image-288039.JPG And just to blow your mind clear out to Saturn. Incidentally OP, where is FM? |
|
|
|
Posted: 8/23/2017 6:41:09 AM EDT
[#18]
Well looky there almost 4 hours sleep and dry sheets. Thanks team
|
|
|
Win a FREE Membership!
Sign up for the ARFCOM weekly newsletter and be entered to win a free ARFCOM membership. One new winner* is announced every week!
You will receive an email every Friday morning featuring the latest chatter from the hottest topics, breaking news surrounding legislation, as well as exclusive deals only available to ARFCOM email subscribers.
AR15.COM is the world's largest firearm community and is a gathering place for firearm enthusiasts of all types.
From hunters and military members, to competition shooters and general firearm enthusiasts, we welcome anyone who values and respects the way of the firearm.
Subscribe to our monthly Newsletter to receive firearm news, product discounts from your favorite Industry Partners, and more.
Copyright © 1996-2024 AR15.COM LLC. All Rights Reserved.
Any use of this content without express written consent is prohibited.
AR15.Com reserves the right to overwrite or replace any affiliate, commercial, or monetizable links, posted by users, with our own.
