Damn, Billy. Sucks to be you. I guess I'd better start saving the pull tabs from pop cans, or you're never gonna play baseball. On the other hand, there are lots of baseball players that can't play even though they have bodies. Detroit has a whole team of guys that can't play.
Oh, and it isn't the constant crying that's chafing your mom's face, either, Billy. It's the constant rubbing on the cheap wool-blend trousers of all the men that pick her up for "quick rides around the trailer court" about every 10 minutes. I've got bad (well, in this case, worse) news for you Billy: your mom is a crack whore. Sorry.
And another thing. NASA's rockets are already overloaded with their own prayers. No more room for any from you, Billy. I'm afraid you'll have to keep giving your prayers to the man in the white dress that likes you to sit (well, slump) on his lap. Oh, no. Now you're in trouble, because you weren't supposed to tell. Damn, Billy. When it rains, it pours.
I don't even know where to begin with the cats, Billy. I don't know what your mom (previously discussed) is telling you, but those aren't kitties that are leaving turds in your burlap sack. Those are black flies, and they're leaving maggots in your burlap sack. Bummer, dude.
I really wish there was something we at ARFCOM could do to help you, Billy, but it just ain't gonna happen. Sell it to DU, buddy.
Oh, you could have redeemed yourself by posting pics of your crack whore mother, but you prbably would have forgotten the knife, napkin, tape measure, beverage, bowling ball and stapler. They always forget the stapler. No matter. It would have been locked.