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Posted: 1/18/2015 7:04:35 AM EDT
DAMN
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:05:10 AM EDT
[#1]
ibtl
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:06:09 AM EDT
[#2]
In..
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:09:04 AM EDT
[#3]
What happened?
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:10:09 AM EDT
[#4]
Again?
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:11:31 AM EDT
[#5]
Thread needs Moar Russian Porn.
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:11:57 AM EDT
[#6]
A man goes into a bar and meets an escort ...






... after talking to her for a bit, he asks her, "Alright. Enough talk. How much is it gonna cost me for a handjob?"




"$50," She says.




"$50 for a handjob? You've got to be kidding me!" He replies.




"Come over here," She says. "See that car outside?" She points to the window. He looks out, and sees a brand new sports car.




"Wow, that looks pretty expensive." He says.




"I bought that purely off $50 handjobs." She replies.




The man thinks to himself, "Hell, they must be pretty good." So he gives her $50, and sure enough, best one he's ever had.




He goes back the next night and finds her again. After a few drinks
he says, "Alright. That handjob last night was pretty good. How much for
a blowjob?"




"$500." She says.




"$500? That's fucking ridiculous." The man replies.




"Come here. See that house on the hill?" she says. So the man comes
over, and looks out the window. Outside on the hill, he sees an
immaculate mansion. Easily more than 20 rooms.




"Wow, that looks extremely expensive." he says.




"I bought that off of $500 blowjobs." she says.




So following suit, the man gives her $500, and sure enough, it's the best blowjob of his entire life.




On the third night, he returns once more. "Alright," He says. "No
more playing around. How much is it gonna cost for some pussy?"




She replies, "Hell, if I had a pussy I'd own this town!"




Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:12:50 AM EDT
[#7]
This
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What happened?
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Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:13:56 AM EDT
[#8]



A prosperous and somewhat amorous businessman propositioned a
beautiful chorus girl of well-proportioned figure to spend the
night with him for $500.




When he was ready to leave the next morning, certain things
having transpired, he told her he didn't have that much money
with him, but would have his secretary mail her a check for
it, made out with a memo of RENT FOR APARTMENT, to avoid any
embarrassment.




On the way to the office, however, after thinking the matter
over carefully, he decided the night hadn't been worth what
he’d agreed to pay. As a result, he had his secretary send a
check for $250 instead, and enclosed the following explanatory
note:




Dear Madam:




"Enclosed is a cheque for the amount of $250 for rent on your
apartment. I am sending this amount instead of the amount
originally agreed upon, because when I rented this apartment,
I was under the impression that...




1. It had never been occupied


2. There was plenty of heat


3. It was small




Last night, I found that it had been occupied many times, that
there wasn't any heat, and that it was entirely too large!"




Upon receipt of the note, the girl immediately returned the
check, with this note:




"I am returning the check for $250. I cannot understand how
you could expect such a beautiful apartment to remain
unoccupied. As for the heat... there is plenty of it there if
you know how to turn it on. As for the size, it's not my fault
if you didn't have enough furniture to furnish it."

Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:17:32 AM EDT
[#9]
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:23:23 AM EDT
[#10]
What do we do now?
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:28:51 AM EDT
[#11]
Did I miss something ?
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:29:22 AM EDT
[#12]
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What do we do now?
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Party like it's 1999.

Staff has some clean up to do.

Txl
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:30:06 AM EDT
[#13]
I don't recall hearing any issues with the Russian Wheat harvest this year....
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:31:08 AM EDT
[#14]

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What do we do now?
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<pmag cover.gif> ?



 
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:32:30 AM EDT
[#15]
Spamalypse?
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:32:56 AM EDT
[#16]
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<pmag cover.gif> ?
 
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Quoted:
What do we do now?

<pmag cover.gif> ?
 


Masturbate Furiously.  Then check back in 3 minutes.
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:33:39 AM EDT
[#17]
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What do we do now?
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Have much more open dialogue with the Russian people, especially the Russian ladies. That would be a very good start.    
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:33:58 AM EDT
[#18]

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Quoted:
Masturbate Furiously.  Then check back in 3 minutes.
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Quoted:


Quoted:

What do we do now?


<pmag cover.gif> ?

 




Masturbate Furiously.  Then check back in 3 minutes.


Done.



 
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:35:19 AM EDT
[#19]
If those are actual phone numbers in the title, the country code (95) is Burma?!?
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:37:33 AM EDT
[#20]
I would give her the  borscht
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:39:12 AM EDT
[#21]
The chair is against the wall.

IBTL
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:41:23 AM EDT
[#22]
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Ha, for some reason I chuckled heartily at, "Is this legal" in the middle of a clusterfuck of commie gibberish.
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:41:49 AM EDT
[#23]
And other threads with Iran numbers (country code = 98)?
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 7:52:52 AM EDT
[#24]

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Quoted:


What do we do now?
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POST WHORE IT UP BITCHES.







 
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 8:03:14 AM EDT
[#25]
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Quoted:
Quoted:
What do we do now?
POST WHORE IT UP BITCHES.

http://i365.photobucket.com/albums/oo94/1manoperation/WHOLELEEFUCK_zps2cb85315.png
 

I almost put you on ignore for that , almost









Link Posted: 1/18/2015 8:05:09 AM EDT
[#26]

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I almost put you on ignore for that , almost
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Quoted:



Quoted:


Quoted:

What do we do now?
POST WHORE IT UP BITCHES.



http://i365.photobucket.com/albums/oo94/1manoperation/WHOLELEEFUCK_zps2cb85315.png

 


I almost put you on ignore for that , almost




 
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 8:07:19 AM EDT
[#27]
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Quoted:
Quoted:
What do we do now?
POST WHORE IT UP BITCHES.

http://i365.photobucket.com/albums/oo94/1manoperation/WHOLELEEFUCK_zps2cb85315.png
 


Link Posted: 1/18/2015 8:20:12 AM EDT
[#28]
In for the deals on hookers
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 8:35:53 AM EDT
[#29]

Link Posted: 1/18/2015 8:37:34 AM EDT
[#30]

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In for the deals on hookers
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2000.00 rubles is what they told me. (30.69 US dollars.)

 
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 8:39:48 AM EDT
[#31]
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Quoted:
2000.00 rubles is what they told me. (30.69 US dollars.)  
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Quoted:
In for the deals on hookers
2000.00 rubles is what they told me. (30.69 US dollars.)  


I'll take 7!
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 8:42:13 AM EDT
[#32]
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Quoted:
2000.00 rubles is what they told me. (30.69 US dollars.)  
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Quoted:
Quoted:
In for the deals on hookers
2000.00 rubles is what they told me. (30.69 US dollars.)  


Wonder if they'd take a 20 and call it good.  I don't like to carry a bunch of cash on me.
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 8:45:41 AM EDT
[#33]
WAT????
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 8:50:24 AM EDT
[#34]

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Quoted:
Wonder if they'd take a 20 and call it good.  I don't like to carry a bunch of cash on me.
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Quoted:



Quoted:


Quoted:

In for the deals on hookers
2000.00 rubles is what they told me. (30.69 US dollars.)  




Wonder if they'd take a 20 and call it good.  I don't like to carry a bunch of cash on me.
She wont wash up up at that price.



 
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 8:55:19 AM EDT
[#35]




You really can't hold the Russians responsible for this.  They're drunk.

A lot.

Link Posted: 1/18/2015 9:05:09 AM EDT
[#36]

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Link Posted: 1/18/2015 9:55:59 AM EDT
[#37]
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Done.
 
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Quoted:
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What do we do now?

<pmag cover.gif> ?
 


Masturbate Furiously.  Then check back in 3 minutes.

Done.
 


I tried.  Half way through my left leg cramped up so bad it made me jump out of bed.  The lights were off and I didn't see a laundry basket so I ended up pants down with a hard on sprawled across the floor with my surprised and not happy to be awake wife yelling at me that I was going to wake the baby.

Fucking Russians.
Link Posted: 1/18/2015 10:39:04 AM EDT
[#38]
PUUUUUTIIIIINNNNNNNN!!!


TC
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