> A farmer has about 200 hens, but no rooster and he
> wants chicks. So, he goes own the road to the next
> farmer and asks if he has a rooster that he would like
> to sell.
>
> The other farmer says, "Yeah, I've got this great
> rooster, named Kenny. He'll service every chicken you
> got, no problem."
>  
> Well, Kenny the rooster costs a lot of money, but the
> farmer decides he'd be worth it.
>
> So, he buys Kenny, and takes him home, where he sets
> him down in the barnyard, and gives him a rooster pep
> talk. "I want you to pace yourself now.  You've got a
> lot of chickens to service here, and you cost me a lot
> of money.  Consequently, I'll need you to do a good
> job. So, take your time and have some fun," the Farmer
> said with a chuckle.
>  
> Kenny seemed to understand, so the farmer pointed
> toward the Hen house and Kenny took off like a shot.
>  
> WHAM! - Kenny nails every hen in the hen house three
> or four times, and the farmer is really shocked.
>  
> After that the farmer hears a commotion in the duck
> pen. Sure enough Kenny is in there.
>  
> Later, the farmer sees Kenny after a flock of geese,
> down by the lake. Once again-WHAM! He gets all the
> geese.  By sunset he sees Kenny out in the fields
> chasing quail and pheasants.
>  
> The farmer is distraught and worried that his
> expensive rooster won't even last 24 hours.
>  
> Sure enough, the farmer goes to bed and wakes up the
> next day, to find Kenny on his back, stone cold in the
> middle of the yard, with buzzards circling overhead.
> The farmer, saddened by the loss of such a colorful
> and expensive animal, shakes his head and says, "Oh,
> Kenny, I told you to pace yourself. I tried to get you
> to slow down, now look what you've done to yourself."
>  
> Kenny opens one eye, nods toward the buzzards circling
> in the sky and says, "Shhh, they're getting closer."

> An old lady is very upset as her husband Albert had
> just passed away. She went to the undertakers to have
> one last look at her dearly departed husband. The
> instant she saw him she starts crying.
>
> One of the undertakers strides up to provide comfort
> in this somber moment. Through her tears she explains
> that she is upset because her dearest Albert was
> wearing a black suit, and it was his dying wishto be
> buried in a blue suit. The undertaker apologizes and
> explains that traditionally, they always put the
> bodies in black, but he'd see what he could arrange.
>
> The next day she returned to the undertakers to have
> one last moment with Albert before his funeral the
> following day. When the undertaker pulls back the
> curtain, she manages to smile through her tears as
> Albert is resplendent in a smart blue suit.
>
> She says to the undertaker "Wonderful, wonderful, but
> where did you get that beautiful blue suit?"
>
> "Well, yesterday afternoon after you left, a man about
> your husband's size was brought in and he was wearing
> a blue suit. His wife explained that she was very
> upset as he had always wanted to be buried in a black
> suit," the undertaker replied. The wife smiled at the
> man.
>
> He continued, "After that, it was simply a matter of
> swapping the heads."