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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:23:35 PM EDT
[#1]
That school was NOT uphill both ways back in the day.
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:24:10 PM EDT
[#2]
Santa
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:24:40 PM EDT
[#3]
If you eat a watermelon seed then a watermelon will grow in your belly......terrified me
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:25:03 PM EDT
[#4]
Girls don't like it when you pull their pigtails.
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:25:19 PM EDT
[#5]
Father Christmas.
eta: dammit, easter bunny then....
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:25:37 PM EDT
[#6]
That I would have hair on my palms by now.
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:25:38 PM EDT
[#7]
If you swallow chewing gum it stays in your stomach for seven years.
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:25:57 PM EDT
[#8]
Quoted:
Girls don't like it when you pull their pigtails. winning |
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:26:13 PM EDT
[#9]
God
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:26:17 PM EDT
[#10]
shit would go on my permanent record
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:26:41 PM EDT
[#11]
Quoted:
If you eat a watermelon seed then a watermelon will grow in your belly......terrified me I was going to post this. |
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:27:21 PM EDT
[#12]
If you keep jumpin on the heat vents. Monkeys will come out and get you
I hate monkeys to do this day |
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:27:23 PM EDT
[#13]
That the expansion grating on bridges was to let blind people know they are changing states.
Back story: a bridge we always crossed between MS & LA had one and my dad was full of shit. I was 5. 
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:28:02 PM EDT
[#14]
Girls don't fart.
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:28:35 PM EDT
[#15]
Snipes
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:28:40 PM EDT
[#16]
To trust people in authority because they have your best interests in heart!
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:29:13 PM EDT
[#17]
Coffee is bad for you.
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:29:57 PM EDT
[#18]
Pot=heroin.
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:31:00 PM EDT
[#19]
I was told that it's OK to be poor. Uh no, it's not. Being poor is terrible. Stupid liberal educators!
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:31:16 PM EDT
[#20]
The President is a role model
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:31:31 PM EDT
[#21]
Quoted:
To trust people in authority because they have your best interests in heart! This. FBHO |
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:31:37 PM EDT
[#22]
I was told by both my parents when I was growing up and getting bad grades that both of them were straight A students, come to find out from them not 6 months ago that both of them had lousy grades in school and they still deny ever telling me that they got good grades.
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:31:49 PM EDT
[#23]
If you didn't wait an hour after eating to go swimming you'd cramp up and drown.
Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile |
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:31:55 PM EDT
[#24]
Toothfairy
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:32:17 PM EDT
[#25]
You need to wait 30 minutes before swimming if you have just eaten. |
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:32:29 PM EDT
[#26]
The Kennedy's were the greatest family in America.
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:32:34 PM EDT
[#27]
Quoted:
For me, it was that if I did not study and go to college I would be a loser and would likely spend my life living under a bridge. What a crock. What have you got? Perfect I don't have to type so much. College=joke |
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:33:10 PM EDT
[#28]
Quoted: If you didn't wait an hour after eating to go swimming you'd cramp up and drown. Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile I did cramp up from eating once in swimming class when I was ten-ish. Sucked. |
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:33:11 PM EDT
[#29]
Always walk backwards when you're in the woods or the Indians will find you and take your hair.
Fuck my dad. |
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:33:26 PM EDT
[#30]
Quoted:
You need to wait 30 minutes before swimming if you have just eaten. That shit was drilled into us 
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:33:43 PM EDT
[#31]
Quoted:
Santa What ? shut your whore mouth! |
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:35:05 PM EDT
[#32]
If you keep making that face it will stay that way forever.
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:35:20 PM EDT
[#33]
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:35:58 PM EDT
[#34]
My dick would fall off if I kept touching it
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:36:00 PM EDT
[#35]
Quoted:
Pot=heroin. This one big time. The DARE program we had made it seem like pot was heroin x10. One smoke and you'd be living on the streets giving handjobs for smack. |
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:36:11 PM EDT
[#36]
Quoted:
shit would go on my permanent record Yah, anybody actually hear or see one of those permanent records they beat us over the head with all through school? |
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:36:45 PM EDT
[#37]
Mexico is a lovely place to vacation.
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:37:31 PM EDT
[#38]
Quoted:
Quoted:
Santa What ? shut your whore mouth! Don't blame me.... 
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:38:05 PM EDT
[#39]
That liquids were incompressible.
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:38:11 PM EDT
[#40]
Quoted:
If you didn't wait an hour after eating to go swimming you'd cramp up and drown. Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile That was mine too. |
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:40:19 PM EDT
[#41]
That's not the kind of snipe the assholes told me I was hunting when I was 5. |
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:40:33 PM EDT
[#42]
Religion.
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:40:45 PM EDT
[#43]
the tie under Colonel Sanders face on the KFC logo is his arms and legs.
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:41:55 PM EDT
[#44]
Quoted:
For me, it was that if I did not study and go to college I would be a loser and would likely spend my life living under a bridge. What a crock. What have you got? This. and that crap about I can be whatever I want to be. |
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:42:23 PM EDT
[#45]
That I could be anything I wanted.
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:42:51 PM EDT
[#46]
Religious topics foisted on me by hypocrites whose hypocritical personal behaviors only became known to me later in my life.
If you're going to espouse a certain pattern of personal conduct, you shouldn't have a different set of rules for when you're out of town and no one from your church can see you engaging in a certain activity. |
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:43:02 PM EDT
[#47]
The reason I never met my older brother, David, is because he didn't mind mom and dad, so they left him by the escalators at the mall.
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:43:07 PM EDT
[#48]
Jackalopes!
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:44:09 PM EDT
[#49]
Democrats also love America and have the nation's best interests at heart, they just have different ideas on how to get things done.
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Posted: 3/14/2013 3:44:38 PM EDT
[#50]
My parents told me the ice cream truck was the song truck, he just drive around playing music. I didn't learn different till I was 9.
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