Here are the latest Darwin Awards, pretty funny stuff

BLOWHOLE
2002 Darwin Award Nominee, Confirmed True

June 2002, Hawaii | 18-year-old Daniel was vacationing with his family
when he met three young women on a Hawaiian beach. Perhaps the company
of the women addled his brain. Half an hour after meeting them, he was
frolicking in a dangerous natural waterspout called the Halona Blowhole:
a rock funnel formation that shoots seawater twenty feet into the air.

A locked gate keeps people away from the stairs to the blowhole, and
a warning sign proclaims, "Hazardous Conditions. Do Not Go Beyond This
Point." A local comedian has placed a skull labeled "Boneyard Reef"
on the warning sign. However, the area can be reach by climbing the
rocks from beaches on either side.

Witnesses said that Daniel walked right by them on his way to the
blowhole, and they warned him to stay away. He kept going, climbing
over the rocky shelves to reach the hole shortly before 3pm.
He was overheard to say he wanted to feel the water hit his chest.

Thirty seconds later his wish was granted. Dozens of people watched
in amazement from a highway overlook while he straddled the blowhole,
arms outstretched, laughing while spray washed over him. Then a large
wave hit the rocks, and a blast of water launched him five feet into
the air and dropped him headfirst into the blowhole

According to firefighter Todd Hugo, who attempted to locate the body
while tied to a safety rope, the blowhole narrows then opens up eight
feet down. "You could tell when a wave was coming in. There was
a kind of humming sound."

Divers recovered Daniel’s body the next day. It was the fourth time
a victim has been swept into the blowhole since 1927. Two men died
in 1969 and 1986, and one man survived in 1967. "I can't understand
the mindset," said Fire Chief James Arciero.

Daniel's female companions were seen being comforted by a young
man wearing a T-shirt that read, "Every day, death is near."
REFERENCE: Honolulu Advertiser



SHORT ARM OF THE LAW
2002 Honorable Mention, Confirmed True

May 2002, Pakistan | Usually it's the criminal, not the judge,
who attempts to take himself out of the gene pool. But not in this
twist of a familiar tale! A man accused of possessing a hand grenade
challenged police to produce it at his trial. When the police brought
the grenade into the courtroom, the defendant claimed it was not real.
The judge absentmindedly took the grenade in his hand while listening
to arguments -- and pulled the pin! He was injured, but survived,
no doubt with improved judgment.  




BEER 'n DEER
Personal Account

June 2002, Georgia | An EMT in southern Georgia was part of the
unit that responded to a call from Coffee County late one night.
They arrived on the scene and found a severely injured man lying
at the edge of a field. His stomach had been completely torn open,
and he was covered with lacerations and bruises. He also had
a prominent tire tread across his chest.

The injured man's companion showed up in a racing model ATV vehicle,
clearly intoxicated, and gave the following account. Imagine this
tale being recited in a deep Georgian accent.

He and his injured friend had been drinkin' and ridin' around the
field on the three-wheeled ATV, when they sighted a stand of deer
in their headlights. The friend, riding the back as a passenger,
was struck with a great idea. "Hey man," he said, "If you quarter
off one a those deer, betcha I can bulldog 'im." The driver thought
this was an entertaining idea, so he proceeded to isolate a buck
and race him down.

His intoxicated passenger proceeded to leap from the ATV, grab the
buck by the antlers, and perform an excellent example of this rodeo
sport. He pinned the animal's head to the ground, but that's when
things went wrong. The buck, less docile than a steer, simply got up,
threw his head back, and tore his assailant's belly open. The deer
then proceeded to stomp, kick, and butt him for good measure.

The EMTs noticed that this information accounted all of the injuries
except one. When they asked the driver about the tire track across
his injured friend's chest, he responded: "Well how else was I s'posed
to git the deer off 'im?"

I don't know which is worse: a drunk moron trying wrestle a grown  male deer like a steer, or a drunk moron who runs over his injured
friend to scare away the righteously angered animal.

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Huh,Huh,huh.... Uh....

What?   huh,huh...

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[:d]

Love these things !!

God bless those who manage to make the Darwin Awards.  Awful kind of them, taking themselves out of the gene pool.  Saves the rest of us the trouble.