Outing myself as a "gun-nut" on stage, tonight

Site Notices

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Outing myself as a "gun-nut" on stage, tonight (Page 1 of 3)

Posted: 12/23/2012 12:49:29 PM EDT

So, my other hobby is doing stand-up comedy. I'm booked at an open-mic tonight and the 7 minutes of material I've been working on the past few months is about as good as it's going to get. So I've spent most of the day writing some brand new stuff. Frankly, it's not very funny right now, but that's how it starts. I'll throw what I've got out there tonight, see what hits and what doesn't, then fine-tune it from there.

So my new material is about me being a so-called "gun nut". Every comic I see who does anything about guns it's all negative BS. "Why do they need assault rifles...must be scared of everything...blah blah dick joke" So I'm going to try to work up 5-7 minutes of material that's about guns in a positive way and still accessible and funny to your average big-city gun-clueless audience. Wish me luck!

Posted: 12/23/2012 12:53:10 PM EDT

[#1]

Tell me a joke.

ETA: WAIT! WAIT! WAIT! I got some ideas for "gun nut" jokes!

OK, here's one you can finish: "So this gun nut walks into a class room." Needs a punch line.

Too soon?

Posted: 12/23/2012 12:55:02 PM EDT

[#2]

Post a video of this evening's routine later.

Posted: 12/23/2012 12:56:41 PM EDT

[#3]

How are you going to deal with the violent angry hecklers?

Posted: 12/23/2012 12:59:21 PM EDT

[#4]

Tag

Go get em, OP.

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:00:52 PM EDT

[#5]

Wher are you going to be

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:02:13 PM EDT

[#6]

Throw some of them at us, we'll be like a test audience. Although, you'll probably have a much higher percentage of hecklers.

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:02:25 PM EDT

[#7]

gonna have it recorded? wouldnt mind seeing some pro gun comedy

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:03:05 PM EDT

[#8]

Could you get it on camera and report back here?

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:04:25 PM EDT

[#9]

In for the Michael Richards re-enactment.

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:06:08 PM EDT

[#10]

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:06:10 PM EDT

[#11]

Try not to veer too far away from comedy while you throw some facts at them. You'll just end up with blank stares. It's a good idea but I don't see how you'll make it funny. I guess that's why I'm not doing standup

Good luck OP

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:06:22 PM EDT

[#12]

tagscribe

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:06:40 PM EDT

[#13]

OP, are you any good?

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:08:08 PM EDT

[#14]

I hope you're funny!

Good luck!

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:08:24 PM EDT

[#15]

Good luck OP you should be able to pull it off just because it will have to be so different from what comics usually trot out.

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:09:21 PM EDT

[#16]

Is this you?

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:10:03 PM EDT

[#17]

Who's got the dick complex? The guy who decided he needs to rely on technology to give him an edge because he finds his own physical prowess lacking or the person who thinks they can beat the shit out of anyone, regards of numbers, that's trying to rob, kill, or rape them or their family?

Not really funny but felt like posting it

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:12:31 PM EDT

[#18]

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:13:40 PM EDT

[#19]

Quoted:
Tell me a joke.

ETA: WAIT! WAIT! WAIT! I got some ideas for "gun nut" jokes!

OK, here's one you can finish: "So this gun nut walks into a class room." Needs a punch line.

Too soon?

Yeah...

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:13:49 PM EDT

[#20]

Good luck, hope they laugh with you... the term "bullet hose" makes me laugh, maybe you could work that in?

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:19:58 PM EDT

[#21]

Tag and break a leg

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:22:22 PM EDT

[#22]

Hey funnyman I'm having a shitty day, I'm depressed. Tell me a funny joke.

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:27:28 PM EDT

[#23]

Continue the joke.

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:32:13 PM EDT

[#24]

My bet is you get booed off stage or pulled off stage by management.

Don't shit where you eat.

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:33:13 PM EDT

[#25]

Quoted:
Continue the joke.

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:33:13 PM EDT

[#26]

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:33:35 PM EDT

[#27]

Obama likes to say he killed bin laden. So who really did? The Navy seals? Wrong a gun did!
Who killed Kennedy? I know who that fucking Italian prick carcano
I never got why John wilks booth got blamed for Lincoln's assassination. We all know it was that asshole derringer

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:34:15 PM EDT

[#28]

tagged for outcome

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:34:40 PM EDT

[#29]

Wow. Kudos for taking that step! You are braver than I would be this close to a mass shooting.

Let us know how it went.

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:34:54 PM EDT

[#30]

Timing is everything.

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:35:06 PM EDT

[#31]

Quoted:
Throw some of them at us, we'll be like a test audience. Although, you'll probably have a much higher percentage of hecklers.

WAITING FOR IT!

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:35:55 PM EDT

[#32]

Quoted:
Wher are you going to be

I'm going to be at the new Improv Comedy club in Buckhead. I'm having the house record my set but I probably won't get a copy for a couple of days. I'll definitely post it once I get it.

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:36:12 PM EDT

[#33]

Good luck...

I imagine it being something like Sweet D on Its Always Sunny...

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:37:32 PM EDT

[#34]

Quoted:
Obama likes to say he killed bin laden. So who really did? The Navy seals? Wrong a gun did!
Who killed Kennedy? I know who that fucking Italian prick carcano
I never got why John wilks booth got blamed for Lincoln's assassination. We all know it was that asshole derringer

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:41:58 PM EDT

[#35]

I'll have a Coke!

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:43:40 PM EDT

[#36]

So you know you are a gun if......

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:46:16 PM EDT

[#37]

Funny....how, funny like a clown.

or

your a clown fish, tell us a joke.

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:46:45 PM EDT

[#38]

Quoted:
Obama likes to say he killed bin laden. So who really did? The Navy seals? Wrong a gun did!
Who killed Kennedy? I know who that fucking Italian prick carcano
I never got why John wilks booth got blamed for Lincoln's assassination. We all know it was that asshole derringer

Not only is this not funny, it is some seriously fucked up shit.

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:47:40 PM EDT

[#39]

You could always do a variation of the old lady with a gun being pulled over. The cop asks if there any firearms in the vehicle and she respond with the 9mm in her purse, the 38 in glove box, and 44 magnum under the seat. You can go 2 ways from here the cop can say "Ma'am what are you afraid of" and she replies "Not a damn thing." Or you can go the route of her responding with "Why do you ask? Do you need one?". I'm sure there is a way to make it funnier but that's your job.

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:48:48 PM EDT

[#40]

Quoted:
How are you going to deal with the violent angry hecklers?

Dirty Harry impression.

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:53:05 PM EDT

[#41]

Quoted:
Post a video of this evening's routine later.

This

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:57:37 PM EDT

[#42]

In for the video. Good luck!

Posted: 12/23/2012 1:57:58 PM EDT

[#43]

Tag for video of tomato-slinging.

Posted: 12/23/2012 2:05:03 PM EDT

[#44]

Quoted:
I'll have a Coke!

hahahaha ill have a coke

Posted: 12/23/2012 2:07:52 PM EDT

[#45]

Quoted:

Quoted:
How are you going to deal with the violent angry hecklers?

Dirty Harry impression.

Posted: 12/23/2012 2:08:49 PM EDT

[#46]

Two of the funniest things I think I've ever read having to do with guns:

1st Over on GlockTalk a guy asked, "My buddy and I were talking the other day and our question is this. What is the best way to carry a glock while in the shower?"
It ran on for weeks with all kinds of crazy funny responses.

2nd One of those youtube videos of two bears talking that animates a conversation. Was all about a total noob wanting to know "What is the BEST gun if I can only own one?" Went through, power, accuracy, controlability, the noob was a total moron and couldn't grasp any concept of 'trade off''. I guess you'd have to see it.

Posted: 12/23/2012 2:11:29 PM EDT

[#47]

"So this gun nut walks into a library and asks, "Do you have any magazines?"

Posted: 12/23/2012 2:12:38 PM EDT

[#48]

Do you ever have this little voice in your head that says "This might be a bad idea"?

Posted: 12/23/2012 2:22:23 PM EDT

[#49]

Quoted:
Two of the funniest things I think I've ever read having to do with guns:

1st Over on GlockTalk a guy asked, "My buddy and I were talking the other day and our question is this. What is the best way to carry a glock while in the shower?"
It ran on for weeks with all kinds of crazy funny responses.

2nd One of those youtube videos of two bears talking that animates a conversation. Was all about a total noob wanting to know "What is the BEST gun if I can only own one?" Went through, power, accuracy, controlability, the noob was a total moron and couldn't grasp any concept of 'trade off''. I guess you'd have to see it.

The problem is that stuff like that is only funny to fellow travelers. I applaud the OP for courage but it will be a real challenge to make gun humor accessible to random, and likely drunk, comedy club patrons.

Posted: 12/23/2012 2:22:23 PM EDT

[#50]

good luck!! kick ass!

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Outing myself as a "gun-nut" on stage, tonight (Page 1 of 3)

General » General Discussion

Warning

Confirm Action

About AR15.COM

Stay Connected

Newsletter

Contact Us