Posted by John Ringo on his Facebook page - if you don't know who John Ringo is go find his book "The Last Centurion" and read it.

The Inevitable Zombie Apocalypse
by John Ringo on Monday, June 11, 2012 at 8:32pm •
The general teaching on writing an essay or doing a speech is that you should open with a joke. Fortunately, the title has that covered for the words 'Inevitable' and 'Zombies' are automatically considered humor. It has to be, right?
Wrong. While there will be humor in this article, there is an inevitability to there being a zombie apocalypse (or at least something resembling it) and it is going to happen in our lifetimes. If worse does not occur first.
"Seriously, dude?" Yes, seriously. "WTF? You kiddin, right?" Nope.
The Zombie Apocalypse. Is. Inevitable. If you don't think so, you don't understand Moore's Law and nerds.
Moore's Law (if you really don't know what it is, look it up) in some variance applies to all emerging technology. In Untold Histories Field Marshall William Slim noted that he liked to gauge the state of industrial technology's advancement between WWI and WWII by the increase in size and power of London City busses. Milling, steam, internal combustion, while they did not precisely 'double in power every eighteen months" all folllowed a fairly set trend of improvement and thus reduction in cost and difficulty of manufacture. Building an original Apple computer took the genius of the Great and Powerful Woz. Building one, now, is literaly child's play. (For values of children.)
The same can be said of biotechnology. I recall a friend who worked in the Tropical and Emerging Diseases Lab, a Class Four Facility (highest contagion) located on the UGA campus and associated with the CDC who's team was attempting in the early Millenia to build a virus following the prescription of the first person to do so from scratch. They tried time and time again to replicate it and were unable.
In 2005, five years later, a Newsweek reporter, buying materials from EBAy, did the same thing, literally, in his kitchen. (With Spanish Flu no less. He was later fired as was the editor who approved the story since they LAID OUT THE ENTIRE RECIPE!)
That is how fast biotech advances. Moore's Law, to some extent or another, applies to all emerging technologies. One day it takes a genius, the next day anybody with the right IQ and background finds it to be child's play.
Second point: A few years ago, at a bio conference in London, a researcher proudly stood up and showed that his lab had proven they could create an infection that would infect a vast swath of population (choose species, genus, phylum or family) but only kill ONE INDIVIDUAL based upon that individual's DNA.
When he asked for questions one member of the audience stood up and proclaimed:
"We've known that in (university research center) for the last five years but we were never STUPID enough to speak about it in PUBLIC!" At which point things became shouty.
By the same token, one can create a pathogen that will infect a vast population, but only target certain races. And, yes, there are clear markers to target race for values of race. It's a term of art in biology, not a term of politics. Westphailians, for example, have distinct genetic markers. Now, Westphalians are MOSTLY still found in Westphalia but the markers are found in a huge population elsewhere (especially the US.) But Negroid? Easy. Han Chinese. Very easy. Jewish. (Racially.) Blonde. (See Live Free Or Die) Etc. 'Northern European' (white) is just as easy. Choose your target or immune population. But be careful. You may not understand your population a well as you think. (The 'crazy' president of Iran is genetically turk but most of his supporters are fars which is a variant of Northern European.)
On the other hand, say: Blonde, female between the biological periods of menarch (puberty) to beginning senescence (generally around 25-27) with big boobs (genetic propensity for high production of specific hormones.) You can either choose to kill them or, and this is a more important point, make them immune. If you're someone who hates that type and can buid the pathogen... That spells and end to the Big Boob Babes of the world. (Hereafter B3 or B4 'Blonde Big Boob Babes.')
Third point: Neurology is advancing as fast as immunology. We're finding out more and more about what makes the brain tick. (And, btw, finding out that most psychology is various forms of superstitious incantations. It's all about the brain chemistry.) We're finding out how to make people think certain ways and react certain ways based purely on their brain chemistry. We're approaching the point we an make people do stuff even they think is crazy. If you can do a little rewrite...
So now we talk about a little thing I like to call "Junior's Home RNA Kit."
Junior's Home RNA kit is not a device or a kit. Junior's Home RNA Kit (Hereafter JHRK or Jerk) is when some little snowflake with WAAAAY too much intelligence, boredom and lack of parental involvement, can build their very own custom virus in their bedroom or mom's basement. They can and do currently do so with computer viruses at present. When the technology and knowledge becomes possible to do so with BIOLOGICAL viruses we have an issue.
The general trend will go like this. Professor Doktor Herr Apocalyptica will invent a virus that can do something to humans. (Well, in fact, it does it to rats. But humans just happen to have the same brain chemistry.) Not just kill them, do something to them. It may, for example, combining the fields of neurology, psychology and virology, cure depression. No more need for Aderol or NoDepressol or whatever. Your neurology is now reset to perfect normal. There will be others that can do other things. Make you smarter, more socially able, less nervous, shy, crowd phobic, what have you. Make you need almost no sleep. (I'd love that one.)
Then some grad student trying to get their masters or doctorate will create a new virus (as many will be created because when you have a breakthrough like that it creates all sorts of easy, for values of easy, graduate projects) that, just for a laugh, makes any girl who is infected fall in love (or at least lust although love is possible as well.) with him. If you DON'T think a biology geek won't write that one, you don't understand male bio geeks.
How does that work? you ask, sceptically.
One proven aspect of male/female sexual interaction, especially (at least so far) for women, is pheromones. All people emit them and they have various effects most of which researchers are still trying to sort out. The geek identifies his specific suite of 'love' (lust because they are alot more about reproduction than permanence) pheromones. Then writes a virus that does a series of actions. First it only affects women. (He can, of course, narrow this down if he's good enough. Only 'hot' babes for values of 'hot.' And I'm assuming, possibly a bad assumption, that the grad student is a he.) Second it does a series of things. It rewrites them to 'like' his pheromones. When sensing his pheromones their libido is enhanced. If he's smart, their capacity for long-term critical decisionmaking is degraded (as it is in males by sexual cues.) If he really wants to fuck with them (not just...) it triggers massive release of oxytocin and vassopressin (look them up.)
So when a woman gets a whiff of the guy, they can't get enough. They act like twilight fans seeing a sparkly vampire. Sex must occur and they must have him FOR ALL TIME.
(In fact, if you WORK in the field of neurology, an interesting study would be to find out what neurotransmitters are, in fact, released when middle aged female twilight fans see a sparkly vampire because it makes NO FUCKING SENSE to the rest of the world. And science is about making sense of the world.)
If, God help him, this actually is released... He'll have to go into hiding and wash with bleach the rest of his life. That or be torn apart by legions of love-struck maenads. If we're talking about a virus there are no indications of the miraculous 'cure' for any virus on the horizon. Anti-virals are relatively ineffective compared to anti-biotics and a vaccine just won't work once the changes have been wrought. Like LFoD it would take doing intense retroviral therapy on each affected patient. Basically, rewriting all the stuff that the virus wrote. Which for legal reasons is never going to be something that some legitimate group will just 'release.'
Okay, so, we're up to the REALLOVEBUGVIRUS.GRN. The REAL lovebug virus that makes all women go gaga for that one scared, humiliated, hiding former PhD candidate with no job prospects and probably a very short, if intense, lifespan.
But... Wow! It sounds so COOL to the nerds who still (despite nerddom being cool) can't get a date with the head of the cheerleading team.
So someone else either gets the formula for LOVEBUG or reverse engineers it and slips their own pheromone DNA into it... Then someone figures out how to just create the base template and slip ANY pheromone cocktail in... (All this requires is the swab of a cheek or possibly underarm plus tech unobtainium here.) And then that gets out to the legions of Scrip Kiddies and...
Women and girls throughout the San Fernando Mall (Or Schezuan or Moscow, scrip kiddies are everywhere and none of them can get dates) are torn and twisted not just by desire but by WHICH of the pimply nerds in the food court they're going to rape right on one of the tables...
Very... Zombielike...
(Frankly, there's a story there about the one kid who DOESN'T do this but women are getting so reprogrammed to go after kids wearing Birth Control Glasses that he just can't even get to the fucking GAP without women hitting on him...)
And if you think bionerd scrip kiddies AREN'T going to spread this all over their school (thus infecting the girls, the boys, their mothers and, OH NO, GRANDMOTHERS for the ones that aren't smart enough to include the 'biological age' controls...) you don't know nerds.
So at a certain point it becomes 'What virus 'best' (note the quotes) serves the nerd community?' Well, what do nerds like? (Male nerds.)
Shouting epithets that make sailors (who aren't nerds) blush with shame while playing match on online games. Not really relevant.
Cheerleaders/schoolgirls. No way to select for cheerleaders or girls that wear short dresses that comes to mind. (But don't bet that some researcher at some point won't find something that tends to select for it. And I suppose you CAN select for really big eyes.)
Boobs. Easy to select for. At least the tendency.
Zombies. Let's face it. The real 'draw' of zombie stuff is the survivor is ALWAYS a nerd. Because we're smart, right? There are nerds, such as myself and my many friends and fans, who just might survive a zombie apocalypse (absent the plague I'm about to describe) but that's because at a certain level we've always been COMBAT NERDS. When the rest were playing with chemistry sets, we were blowing them up. While we can and do play various 'indoor' games, (WoW by preferencewe but sex will suffice) also played 'outdoor' games like 'Who can hit that squirrel with a rock/axe/spear/.22?' (And 'Want to go skinny dipping?') We can, in fact, shoot an adequately slowly moving zombie in the head with no more than three rounds. (Yes, I know, you can all do it with one. Sue me. I'm actually not that good of a shot.) Given reasonable age and condition (I'm pretty well screwed) we're much more likely to survive a Romero 'mystical' ZA than your average jock, cheerleader or, frankly, scrip kiddy who has never gone outside if he can possibly help it and while he's the world class with Modern Combat has never held a gun in his life.
But that won't deter the scrip kiddy from writing the B3 'Virus'.
B3 pathogen. Def: The pathogen (may be a virii or coronavirii or something we created in a lab that's worse) is set to infect the entire human population. It terminates all members of the target population except Big Boob Babes (probably between the ages of about 13 and 27) and the scrip kiddy. And all remaining female members of the human race are massively attracted to the scrip kiddy...
At which point the few immunes beat him to death with baseball bats.
I've ideated a short story in the aftermath about the battle between the Gay, Lesbian, Transgender Alliance for the End of Humanity and the Breeders for Freedom over the last functioning sperm bank titled "Every Sperm is Sacred."
See. Humor. Black humor but humor.
Do you begin to see why a zombie apocalypse is inevitable?
Because assuming some little hitler (who is probably closer to 27, has some family wealth, was raised as 'a little snowflake' who was just 'misunderstood' when he looked up girls dresses and killed animals, did poorly in college but managed to get into grad school (possibly due to family influence) but didn't get his masters, no social skills and has some specific obsession that drives him to hate the rest of humanity, pick one, bullying, environment, gays, Jews, Christians, Islamics, Democrats, Republicans...) with lots of IQ and no real morality (even though he CARES about his obsession) gets around to it.
It may have a B3/B4 aspect. It may skip some group or it may not. But some little bastard at some point is going to write the zombie virus. Hell, it may not even be a little bastard. These fucktards not only created a more deadly strain of avian flu they WANT TO TELL EVERY LITTLE SCRIP KIDDY HOW TO MAKE IT!
http://news.sciencemag.org/scienceinsider/2012/01/flu-researcher-ron-fouchier-its.html
There is, in other words, a very good chance that at least the basic zombie virus will be created by some professor who thinks its a good way to get grant money.
ZV1 Def: The Zombie Virus (One) Is a dual infection (airborne and blood transfer) pathogen. Iinfects all humans and higher order primates through airborne methods. (Tested on twelve rhesus monkeys at Erasmus MC, Holland.) Under some conditions (blood transfer) may infect other mammals. Effects are primarily neurological. Degrades higher order brain functions. Reduces emotional controls. Increases aggression including desire to rend with teeth. Causes schitzophrenic effects such as the removal of clothing. Neurological effects are permanent.
The Zombie Apocalypse. Is. Inevitable. If you don't think so, you don't understand Moore's Law and nerds. Or, for that matter, doctors desperate for something to put them in the headlines so they can get grant money. And, folks, people may hesitate to release a swine flu but you make a ZOMBIE flu and Katy Bar the Door.
Is there an answer? Yes.
I, with suitable hyperbole, discussed it in LFoD. We don't have nannites but we're getting close to the point we can 'reprogram' the body's immune system. So...
There's a device. A patch. A bot. An unobtainium thingy. Probably located in your left armpit. Every time you pass a WiFi transmitter it updates. What are the updates? Virus definitions. Biological virus definitions. Then it picks a T Cell (or B cell or whatever) and updates it to say 'This virus has already entered your body (false) and you are prepared in the future to release antibodies against it if it shows up again (true)."
There is no 'universal vaccine' but it's close.
Problems? Multitudes. First of all, it's juuuust out of our reach technologically. My fear (and it's a very deep and abiding fear) is that it will still be juuuuust out of our reach about the time that junior get his home RNA kit. Because nobody wants to do it. It's too fraught with peril.
Cost: It would have to be something along the lines of a small chemistry set in your body.
Politics: Not the 'you're not planting that devil thing in my body!' politics the 'It's only going to work for people with access to advanced technology! What about the poor people in developing countries?!' Which, of course, is a reason for the rest of humanity to die.
Hacking. See cost. Small chem set. No reason it couldn't be used to create the conditions it's designed to prevent.
There is no 'universal vaccine' but it's close. And despite the problems, Forget worrying about global warming or global cooling or climate change or deforestation or species die-off or the whales. If somebody doesn't get started on it before Junior Snowflake gets his Home RNA kit off of EBay...
All the guns and food and generators and preparation in the world won't matter. Do you really want the rest of humanity to perish, all the children, all the cheerleaders, all the dogs who get bit and families and veterans and children... so you can scavenge the ruins? Are you really that much of a sociopath?
If so... Please study something other than biotechnology. Or send me your address and I'll send you a nice signed book that when you open it removes you from the world for the good of humanity. You see, I studied chemistry...

It might as well be in purple because I'm not reading all that either.

Paragraphs are nice.

TL-DR

That is a whole lotta words.
Why, Johnny Ringo! You look like someone just walked over your grave!
All I've got.

I did not like "The Last Centurion"

UR gonna get raped for that wall o'text...

WOW!

pretty good read....

but I have thought along those lines for years...

ha combat nerd indeed...

Too bad.

That might have been interesting.

I just punched myself in the face.

Not bad, interesting
 

Day 1

He is three books into writing the series based off that plot line now...

Looks like they should be good

Read it all.

Yes, the future is still scary.

Welcome

Tag for when I have a few hours to read.

really hard to follow in my opinion

Should listen to the audio book then..... fucking STELLAR.  It was actually the first John Ringo title I "read," and the impetus behind me listening to the entire goddam Legacy of the Aldenata series.  And the three Troy Rising books as well.  I bought the hardback, but have never cracked it open.... listen to the book, then come back - it'll be worth it.

Ringo needs to get writing, he owes me series continuations for the Legend of the Aldenaata, LFoD, the Council Wars and the Kildar. Don't dilute with a foray into zombies.

Can we please have the sparknotes edition?

which series deals with Zombies?

I am currently reading Queen of wands

Don't worry - Aaron Cross has been genetically reengineered and can save us.

The one he's finishing in the next few weeks, to be published next year. ;) The only reason I have a facebook account is to follow the stuff he comes up with - he's been talking about it for a month so.

Worth reading in toto.
Ringo's stuff has always made me think, and I tend to read his books in front of an internet connection 'cause he tosses in such interesting sidelight tidbits.

new one scheduled for late next year, he has been discussing them in progress on facebook, but the posts are rather spoilerish.

He just finished the third volume.

New, co authered Kildar book is scheduled for january Tiger by the tail

supposedly he is supposed to be working on  new Prince Roger as well (think his foray into zombieland has delayed that)

Clif Notes - Nerds will be the doom of humanity because they will try and get laid by releasing a virus to modify big boobed blondes genetics and thinking to like nerds. Unforeseen consequences will unleash the zombie apocalypse. Arfcom to the rescue!

I read it and understood just enough of it to know he is right.

yeah that's a possibility I suppose, I see a lot of things that stop it from being so easy like a real understanding of genetics.

nanites are actually almost as probable as such a designer virus.

Op please at least split that shit up in to some paragraphs or something that was hard as hell to read

Needs moar Winterborn

This.

ETA:  Wait...I saw the word boobs in there.  Might be worth a third scan.  

No.  Nevermind.  Scrip kiddy???  Really?

All it says is that I am legend can happen.  Mess with virus 's and crap, and you are opening a pandora's box.

Biotech is this generation's atomic bomb. The irony of technological progress is that, while improving standards of living, it also increases the chances of extinction.
 

Kinda sobering.
 

I strongly doubt that any virus can be both effective enough upon the host, and virulent enough to spread globally, to make a serious impact.  Particularly for human-written viruses.  Who knows though...

In the future, Jr will get a DNA chemistry set. Being a nerd, he'll program phermone virus to be attractive to 4B's (big buxomie blond babes). Will not program in an age limit factor. Will be snu-snued to death by middle-aged women who are big fans of those angst filled werewolve movies. That's as far as I got.

He's writing a book (or series) based on that? Oh shit!

Bad part is, I can entirely see this happening, based on just some of
the fucknuts that I have to deal with on a regular basis!!

I love John Ringo.  If there was one author I could meet and have a few beers with, it would be that guy.

Did you like "Green Eggs and Ham?"

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That's not what it says.  That's what we tell our selves.  That it "can" happen.  What his argument is, is that it's inevitable.  It will happen.  He's right.  Oh, maybe not "zombies" or B4 love potions, but something, probably worse.

Wanna be Hitlers of the 21st century won't need armies of men and materials.  Just Juniors Home RNA Kit.

Ain't reading that shit, I like his books and will read them when they come out but not that.

link to his facebook page?  All I can find is some fan made page with a clip from wikipedia.

Council Wars will be a while, that series didn't sell well so is on the back burner.  He's still brainstorming for the next Legacy of the Aldenata book (two more are planned to finish the mainline story, Tom Kratman will be writing several more side universe stories).   The next Kildar book is _Tiger by the Tail_ written with/by Ryan Sear, out in January.  He got himself in a fix with _The Hot Gate_, he hadn't planned on that battle being as major as it turned out to be and is having to approach the next book differently.  He was actually trying to work on the next Prince Roger book, a sequel to _We Few_ when he started having ideas for what he is now calling the Black Tide series.  





But once an idea for a story is solidly there, he HAS to write it, that's how _Ghost_ came about.  And, if anything, he's writing FASTER on this series than he did on _Ghost_ and _Kildar_.  He got married at the end of June, he was sort of talking about how a "zombie"-like event could happen due to someone playing stupid games with tailored RNA/DNA viruses around that time, but wasn't really talking about a story.  Two weeks later, in mid-July, he first started talking about a story.  He was at a convention the weekend of July 20th, other than that, he's written two complete books and part of a third in about six weeks, and is still writing the third (although he'll have a break this weekend for Dragon*Con).





He HASN'T been writing much for a couple of years, he got in trouble with the IRS (he's publicly stated this, I'm not revealing anything) and the stress from that killed his creativity.  That is somewhat resolved and the reduction in stress is letting him get writing done again, but it isn't always what he knows he SHOULD be writing (he wasn't supposed to start a new series until he wrapped one of the others up, but while the publisher would prefer he write in one of the existing series to close it out, she'll take what she can get from him if it's something that is well-written and likely to sell well).





He's been dropping bits and pieces of the Black Tide books on his Facebook page and soliciting for character names every few days, so if you do Facebook and want to see what he's writing or try to get in a book, friend him (John Ringo in Chattanooga, wearing a hat in front of some kind of hotel, probably in Florida from the palm trees).




 
 

He'll be at Dragon*Con in Atlanta this weekend :-)  Although he frequently doesn't drink a lot at cons, he's had some bad experiences with that...  










 

John Ringo



 

Nice.
Keep  the Apocalypse coming Ringo, waiting for the next chapter.

Fuck my ADD.
 

I loved how he killed everyone in Turkey off in "The Last Centurion" but Greece was alive and kicking. What's his screenname?

Like there are no people in Turkey with preps and a survival mindset.

You got distracted by the sight of EXP in leather chaps with no pants on.  No preps can save you from your carnal weaknesses, bro.  

good read.  a tad near sighted now, but good read nonetheless.