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Posted: 7/11/2002 3:05:22 PM EDT
[#1]
[img]http://www.petenelson.com/Photos/Misc/Mall%20Ninja/ar15_dating_game.jpg[/img]
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Posted: 7/11/2002 3:09:15 PM EDT
[#2]
(in used-car salesman voice): Now, see here, I got this Garand you might like...
[img]http://www.acmearms.com/images/P6250025.JPG[/img] ..she's a good shooter and goin' cheap. Don't worry about the paint on this one we'll fix it up nice an' good for ya.... |
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Posted: 7/11/2002 3:09:42 PM EDT
[#3]
A horse walks into a bar...
Bartender says, "Why the long face?" |
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Posted: 7/11/2002 3:12:38 PM EDT
[#4]
[img]http://www.snedegar.net/ryan/images/humorous/dilh.jpg[/img]
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Posted: 7/11/2002 3:13:25 PM EDT
[#5]
A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her.
She goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and sure enough, she opens the door and finds him in the arms of a redhead. Well, now she's angry! She opens her purse to take out the gun but as she does so, she is overcome with grief. She takes the gun and points to her head. The boyfriend yells, "No, honey, don't do it!!" "Shut up," she says, "You're next." |
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Posted: 7/11/2002 3:20:12 PM EDT
[#6]
OMFG sfoo, you made me bang my head on my monitor!
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Posted: 7/11/2002 3:21:58 PM EDT
[#7]
(from the man in red) "That sumbitch mall ninja can barely hold that dang thing!"
[img]http://www.petenelson.com/Photos/Events/Misc/Shot%20Shot%2C%20Feb%202002/Jojo%20with%20AR-51.jpg[/img] "I'm sporting this much wood right now!" [img]http://www.petenelson.com/Photos/Events/Misc/Shot%20Shot%2C%20Feb%202002/Jojo%20with%20the%20Super%20Kife%20Girls%2C%20Dillon%20Booth.jpg[/img] Don't worry, someone always has a crappier job for you. Yes, that is an overturned lavatory service truck at the airport. [img]http://www.petenelson.com/Photos/Vacations/Las%20Vegas%2C%20June%202001/Lav%20Service.jpg[/img] |
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Posted: 7/11/2002 3:26:12 PM EDT
[#8]
[img]http://www.petenelson.com/Photos/Misc/Misc/Gas%20Hose%20%28small%29.jpg[/img]
And sfoo in one of his finer moments :) [img]http://www.ecis.com/~weasel/temp/yeayeah.jpg[/img] |
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Posted: 7/11/2002 3:41:22 PM EDT
[#9]
Quoted: And sfoo in one of his finer moments :) It was a christmas present!!! I swear!!! My parents made me do it! |
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Posted: 7/11/2002 3:49:54 PM EDT
[#10]
Great Kangaroo!!!! Keep em coming!!!!
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Posted: 7/11/2002 4:04:36 PM EDT
[#11]
Wanna Laugh? Hold on let me unzip my pants. On second thought...
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Posted: 7/11/2002 4:24:19 PM EDT
[#12]
[img]www.ar15.com/members/albums/Grock%2Fthong%2Ejpg[/img]
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Posted: 7/11/2002 4:41:04 PM EDT
[#13]
[img]http://www.bol.ucla.edu/~rahjr79/godkills.jpg[/img]
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Posted: 7/11/2002 5:13:22 PM EDT
[#14]
STUD ROOSTER
A farmer goes out one day and buys a brand new stud rooster for his chicken coop. The new rooster struts over to the old rooster and says, "OK, you old fart, time for you to retire." The old rooster replies, 'Come on, surely you cannot handle ALL of these chickens. Look what it has done to me. Can't you just let me have the two old hens over in the corner?" The young rooster says, "Beat it! You're washed up and I'm taking over." The old rooster says, "I tell you what, young stud. I'll race you around the farmhouse. Whoever wins gets the exclusive domain over the entire chicken coop." The young rooster laughs, "You know you don't stand a chance old man,so just to be fair I will give you a head start." The old rooster takes off running. About 15 seconds later the young rooster takes off running after him. They round the front porch of the farmhouse and the young rooster has closed the gap. He is already about 5 inches behind the old rooster and gaining fast. The farmer, meanwhile, is sitting in his usual spot on the front porch when he sees the roosters running by. He grabs up his shotgun and BOOM! He blows the young rooster to bits. The farmer sadly shakes his head and says, "Dangit... third gay rooster I bought this month." Moral of this story: Don't mess with us old folks ....age and treachery always beats youth & speed |
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Posted: 7/11/2002 5:22:14 PM EDT
[#15]
[img]www.ar15.com/members/albums/Aimless%2Fcowdance%2Egif[/img]
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Posted: 7/11/2002 5:26:10 PM EDT
[#16]
You're all SICK! I like it!
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Posted: 7/11/2002 5:28:07 PM EDT
[#17]
Funny ninja stuff-heads cut off, wailing on guitars, death to pirates!!!!
[url=]http://koti.mbnet.fi/poutane/markus/nm.html[/url] WARNING: This takes FOREVER to load & that was on a cable modem |
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Posted: 7/11/2002 5:28:25 PM EDT
[#18]
Quoted: [img]www.ar15.com/members/albums/Grock%2Fthong%2Ejpg[/img] This is just so NOT something I wanted to see. |
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Posted: 7/11/2002 5:32:35 PM EDT
[#19]
This bear walks into a bar. Then he sits down and orders a beer.
The bartender, amazed that this bear can actually talk, gives him a beer. The bear says, "What do I owe you?" The bartender stops and thinks for a moment. "Even though this bear is smart," thinks the bartender, "he probably hasn't been in many bars." So the bartender says, "That'll be ten dollars." The bear forks over the money and starts drinking his beer. After a few minutes, the bartender can't restrain his curiosity, so he walks back over to the bear and tries to strike up a conversation. "You know, we don't get many bears in this bar." The bear looks up from his beer and says, "Well, at ten bucks a beer, I'm not surprised." |
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Posted: 7/11/2002 5:35:32 PM EDT
[#20]
There are 2 muffins baking in the oven
The first muffin says to the second muffin "goddamn it sure is hot in here" The second muffin says "Holy shit!!! A talking Muffin!!" |
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Posted: 7/12/2002 12:50:20 AM EDT
[#21]
A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey.
He orders a drink and while he's drinking, the monkey starts jumping all over the place. The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them, then grabs some sliced limes and eats them, then jumps up on the pool table, grabs the cue ball, sticks it in his mouth and swallows it whole. The bartender screams at the guy, "Did you see what your monkey just did?" The guy says, "No, what?" "He just ate the cue ball off my pool table - whole!" says the bartender. "Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replies the patron. "He eats everything in sight, the little jerk. I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff." He finishes his drink, pays his bill, and leaves. Two weeks later he's in the bar again, and he has his monkey with him. He orders a drink and the monkey starts running around the bar again. While the man is drinking, the monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his butt, pulls it out, and eats it. The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see what your monkey did now?" "Now what?" asks the patron. "Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry up his butt, then pulled it out and ate it!" says the barkeeper. "Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replies the patron. "He still eats everything in sight, but ever since he ate that cue ball he measures everything first!" |
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Posted: 7/12/2002 1:49:40 AM EDT
[#22]
Quoted: [img]www.ar15.com/members/albums/Grock%2Fthong%2Ejpg[/img] [img]pweb.netcom.com/~mattja/pics/carville.jpg[/img] [b]What is your major malfunction, boy?[/b] |
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Posted: 7/12/2002 2:42:09 AM EDT
[#23]
This always makes me laugh:
There were a bunch of them posted a while back. [img]http://64.242.166.10/ar15/bratty.jpg[/img] [img]http://64.242.166.10/ar15/anti8.jpg[/img] [img]http://64.242.166.10/ar15/gym.jpg[/img] [img]http://64.242.166.10/ar15/pantydropper.jpg[/img] |
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Posted: 7/12/2002 1:23:30 PM EDT
[#24]
A lady about eight months pregnant got on a bus. She noticed the man opposite her was smiling at her. She immediately moved to another seat. This time the smile turned into a grin, so she moved again. The man seemed more amused. When on the fourth move, the man burst out laughing, she complained to the driver and he had the man arrested.
The case came to court. The judge asked the man what he had to say for himself. The man replied, "Well your honor, it was like this: When the lady got on the bus, I couldn't help noticing her condition." "She sat under a sign that said, 'the Double Mint Twins are coming,' and I grinned." "Then she moved and sat under a sign that said, 'Sloans Liniment will reduce the swelling,' and I had to smile." "Then she placed herself under a sign that said, "Williams big stick did the trick,' and I could hardly contain myself." "But your honor, when she moved the fourth time and sat under a sign that said, 'Goodyear Rubber could have prevented this accident,' ... I just lost it." "Case dismissed." |
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Posted: 7/12/2002 1:34:44 PM EDT
[#25]
[img]"D:\Shawn\Graphics\tank vs boy.jpg"[/img]
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