the officer watched for about 30 seconds as Davis was “masturbating violently"

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[ARCHIVED THREAD] - the officer watched for about 30 seconds as Davis was “masturbating violently"

Posted: 8/11/2011 9:40:33 PM EDT

http://www.seattlepi.com/local/article/Rapist-There-just-isn-t-enough-free-love-in-1885725.php

A convicted rapist allegedly caught “masturbating violently” on a Capitol Hill basketball court has been charged with indecent exposure.
At 3:30 a.m. on July 20, a Seattle police on patrol near Cal Anderson Park spotted Nicholas L. Davis lying face up on a basketball court, exposing himself, according to charging documents.
According to charging papers filed with King County Superior Court, the officer watched for about 30 seconds as Davis was “masturbating violently.” Davis stopped after spotting the officer’s patrol car.
“There just isn’t enough free love in Seattle,” Davis is alleged to have said.

Posted: 8/11/2011 9:43:01 PM EDT

[#1]

"There just isn’t enough free love in Seattle,” Davis is alleged to have said.

LMFAO!!!

Fucking ARFCOM consistently comes through with the most absurd, disturbing, hilarious shit.

Posted: 8/11/2011 9:45:46 PM EDT

[#2]

Why would he watch for so long?

Posted: 8/11/2011 9:48:58 PM EDT

[#3]

Quoted:
Why would he watch for so long?

some people are just into that kind of thing. NTTAWWT....

Posted: 8/11/2011 9:49:58 PM EDT

[#4]

Jack Booted Voyer?

Posted: 8/11/2011 9:50:22 PM EDT

[#5]

Well, I don't want to speak for the defendant, but some ghosts just don't chase off as easily as most.

Posted: 8/11/2011 9:50:32 PM EDT

[#6]

Quoted:
Why would he watch for so long?

5 seonds: WTF???????
10 seconds: NFW!!!!!!!
5 seconds: What should I do?
5 seconds: How do I announce THAT on the radio???
5 seconds: Start closing in on suspect.

Posted: 8/11/2011 9:50:33 PM EDT

[#7]

If people don't want to see me masturbating then they shouldn't sit by me on the bus.

Posted: 8/11/2011 9:55:04 PM EDT

[#8]

Yeah, when I want to go fap there's nothing like laying down on the cold pavement of basketball court under the moon light. I dunno, it's a Seattle thing.

Posted: 8/11/2011 9:56:55 PM EDT

[#9]

So the cop watched till the violent masturbator noticed he was there? WTF??

This post made me add "masturbator" to the dictionary.

Posted: 8/11/2011 10:00:24 PM EDT

[#10]

Quoted:
Why would he watch for so long?

30 seconds? he probably was doing a mental 'reality check'. Last time I saw some crazy guy twanging his fiddle in broad daylight it took a moment for the full absurdity to sink in.

Posted: 8/11/2011 10:07:21 PM EDT

[#11]

There used to be an effective technique for this kind of offender known as "beat and release"

Posted: 8/11/2011 10:07:33 PM EDT

[#12]

Double dutch rudder?

Posted: 8/11/2011 10:08:34 PM EDT

[#13]

Quoted:
There used to be an effective technique for this kind of offender known as "beat and release"

No, definitely catch and release.

Posted: 8/11/2011 10:09:11 PM EDT

[#14]

Quoted:
Why would he watch for so long?

Maybe he was worried the guy was near finishing and didn't want to get any back splash as he closed in??

"Hey, stop right there"....................."OH FUCK YOU GOT IT ON MY SHOE!!!!!!!!!"

Posted: 8/11/2011 10:10:26 PM EDT

[#15]

Sounds like he at least let the guy finish.
who wants to get cuffed and stuffed with blue balls?

Posted: 8/11/2011 10:11:47 PM EDT

[#16]

This thread is easy to masturbate violently to.

Posted: 8/11/2011 10:12:20 PM EDT

[#17]

new form of planking

Posted: 8/12/2011 3:17:07 AM EDT

[#18]

Wat do I have to do to make my masturbation violent?

Posted: 8/12/2011 3:39:29 AM EDT

[#19]

He was probably waiting to see if the suspect would double dribble.

Posted: 8/12/2011 3:48:24 AM EDT

[#20]

Quoted:

Quoted:
Why would he watch for so long?

5 seonds: WTF???????
10 seconds: NFW!!!!!!!
5 seconds: What should I do?
5 seconds: How do I announce THAT on the radio???
5 seconds: Start closing in on suspect.

no, no, it was 20 seconds of wtf is that guy doing??????? Oh, my god!

Posted: 8/12/2011 3:52:16 AM EDT

[#21]

Dealing with shit like that has got to be one of the worst parts of being a cop.

Posted: 8/12/2011 3:55:43 AM EDT

[#22]

Quoted:
He was probably waiting to see if the suspect would double dribble.

He certainly committed a personal foul.

Posted: 8/12/2011 3:56:44 AM EDT

[#23]

Quoted:

Quoted:
Why would he watch for so long?

5 seonds: WTF???????
10 seconds: NFW!!!!!!!
5 seconds: What should I do?
5 seconds: How do I announce THAT on the radio???
5 seconds: Start closing in on suspect.

no, no, it was 20 seconds of wtf is that guy doing??????? Oh, my god!

Don't forget the time to put rubber gloves on.

Posted: 8/12/2011 4:02:49 AM EDT

[#24]

Quoted:

Why would he watch for so long?

Meat gazer.

Posted: 8/12/2011 4:06:59 AM EDT

[#25]

What's his screen name?

Posted: 8/12/2011 4:09:39 AM EDT

[#26]

1GR in the news again.

Posted: 8/12/2011 4:16:06 AM EDT

[#27]

Not enough free love in Seattle? This guy was smoking rock right?

Posted: 8/12/2011 4:35:26 AM EDT

[#28]

I wish I still had the prison report of an inmate masturbating at the window of the office while watching a female corrections officer. When she saw him he ran down the hall back to his cubical. He was running, whacking and ejaculating at the same time. The written report was epic and the other inmates describing it to me the next day had me near death from laughing so hard. Apparently, it isn't easy to run, whack and ejaculate at the same time!

Posted: 8/12/2011 4:38:18 AM EDT

[#29]

Quoted:

Quoted:
Why would he watch for so long?

5 seonds: WTF???????
10 seconds: NFW!!!!!!!
5 seconds: What should I do?
5 seconds: How do I announce THAT on the radio???
5 seconds: Start closing in on suspect.

Hell, I'd probably be on the "WTF? NFW?" stage still. Some things are just too out there to register.

Posted: 8/12/2011 4:38:59 AM EDT

[#30]

Quoted:
I wish I still had the prison report of an inmate masturbating at the window of the office while watching a female corrections officer. When she saw him he ran down the hall back to his cubical. He was running, whacking and ejaculating at the same time. The written report was epic and the other inmates describing it to me the next day had me near death from laughing so hard. Apparently, it isn't easy to run, whack and ejaculate at the same time!

Hilarious!

Posted: 8/12/2011 4:40:30 AM EDT

[#31]

Quoted:

I wish I still had the prison report of an inmate masturbating at the window of the office while watching a female corrections officer. When she saw him he ran down the hall back to his cubical. He was running, whacking and ejaculating at the same time. The written report was epic and the other inmates describing it to me the next day had me near death from laughing so hard. Apparently, it isn't easy to run, whack and ejaculate at the same time!

It's a perishable skill.

Posted: 8/12/2011 4:43:28 AM EDT

[#32]

How does one masturbate "violently"?

I'd fed the pigeons aplenty but this is a new one on me.

Posted: 8/12/2011 4:45:04 AM EDT

[#33]

Poor guy, must've been some serious ghosts around there.

Posted: 8/12/2011 4:46:18 AM EDT

[#34]

Quoted:
Why would he watch for so long?

maybe the officer is not an expert at recognizing male masturbation like you are?

Posted: 8/12/2011 4:47:19 AM EDT

[#35]

Quoted:

Wat do I have to do to make my masturbation violent?

Be firing an M-16 at a playground with the other hand?

Posted: 8/12/2011 4:48:05 AM EDT

[#36]

Quoted:
How does one masturbate "violently"?

I'd fed the pigeons aplenty but this is a new one on me.

You beat it with a rubber hose.

Posted: 8/12/2011 4:48:54 AM EDT

[#37]

This reminds me of the scene in the movie "Hall Pass" where the guy is out in his minivan and the cops roll up.

Good times.

Posted: 8/12/2011 4:56:55 AM EDT

[#38]

Quoted:

Quoted:
Why would he watch for so long?

some people are just into that kind of thing. NTTAWWT....

If the squad car's a rockin, don't come a knockin...

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Posted: 8/12/2011 5:57:04 AM EDT

[#39]

That's a bloody fuckin lie! I didn't say that at all!

Posted: 8/12/2011 6:02:59 AM EDT

[#40]

Quoted:

Why would he watch for so long?

First trying to figure out WTF he was seeing, then figuring out what he was going to do about it, and then deciding if he really wanted to touch the guy...