Chronicles of Bruiser, A look at the life of sweeper vac driver

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Chronicles of Bruiser, A look at the life of sweeper vac driver

Posted: 1/30/2011 8:38:00 PM EDT

Thank you StumbleUpon.com for this gem of a read. This is comedy gold well worth the 80 page read.

http://www.scribd.com/doc/33096/Bruiser-A-street-sweepers-tales

"When I burned out of college in spring of 2006, I found myself needing cash in the wors tkind of way. I was flipping through the newspaper when I found an ad that read:"Sweeper Vac Driver needed. 3rd shift only"and gave subsequent contact info. I'm really great doing over night work and decided that I'd give it a shot. I arrive at the office, fill out an application, and before I walked out of the door I was given the job and told to report for training the following evening. So, I reported to the office the following evening... and had the weirdest/craziest/funniest
8 months of my life. I was hoping to share a story or two with you guys. If you like 'em,
I've got TONS"

All WELL worth the read.

Posted: 1/30/2011 9:01:28 PM EDT

[#1]

That was awesome!

Posted: 1/30/2011 9:03:27 PM EDT

[#2]

I reread that every few years , its quite old as the interweb goes

monster from the dumpster , knife wielding crackheads and 100mph flaming street sweeper from hell FTW

Posted: 1/30/2011 9:11:17 PM EDT

[#3]

I'm laughing like an idiot here...

Posted: 1/30/2011 9:29:12 PM EDT

[#4]

Read it a few years back...shame about the "girl"...

Posted: 1/30/2011 9:46:18 PM EDT

[#5]

Quoted:
Read it a few years back...shame about the "girl"...

I just remembered the whole thing in a split second when you said this.

Posted: 1/30/2011 9:51:23 PM EDT

[#6]

I saw the thread title and immediately thought of this guy.

Posted: 1/30/2011 10:10:01 PM EDT

[#7]

It's pretty worth it.

Posted: 1/30/2011 10:12:22 PM EDT

[#8]

i remember that, good read.

Posted: 1/30/2011 10:19:23 PM EDT

[#9]

Quoted:
Read it a few years back...shame about the "girl"...

This. I found a .pdf version of it once upon a time, I think someone on that forum put it together. If anyone wants it, IM me and I'll see if I can dig it up.

Posted: 1/30/2011 10:34:59 PM EDT

[#10]

What reference to the girl do you guys mean? I stopped about 40 pages in.

Posted: 1/30/2011 11:25:41 PM EDT

[#11]

Quoted:

Quoted:
Read it a few years back...shame about the "girl"...

This. I found a .pdf version of it once upon a time, I think someone on that forum put it together. If anyone wants it, IM me and I'll see if I can dig it up.

Found it. Good stuff.

Bruiser .pdf

Posted: 1/31/2011 12:45:47 AM EDT

[#12]

In the OP's link, all pages after 3 are blank...even disabled NoScript and ctrl+F5'd the page. No idea what's up with that.

PDF version worked fine, thanks for the link.

Posted: 1/31/2011 12:47:41 AM EDT

[#13]

Pretty sure the folks on SA decided it was fake.

Still entertaining though.

Posted: 1/31/2011 12:58:14 AM EDT

[#14]

There is no way that even 10% of that is true.

I still read it all.

Posted: 1/31/2011 1:01:48 AM EDT

[#15]

Quoted:

There is no way that even 10% of that is true.

nope, not a chance...

But the guy did a decent job of stringing along a sea story, err... street sweepers tale...

Posted: 1/31/2011 1:02:02 AM EDT

[#16]

I read a few pages and it's seemed that he only talked about how big he was and how good he was at driving a sweeper truck

Posted: 1/31/2011 1:02:51 AM EDT

[#17]

Quoted:

There is no way that even 10% of that is true.

I still read it all.

Same as the Tucker Max stories...probably all bullshit, but still an interesting read.

Posted: 1/31/2011 5:23:53 AM EDT

[#18]

Posted: 1/31/2011 5:26:06 AM EDT

[#19]

When is this going to be on History Channel?

Posted: 1/31/2011 5:33:37 AM EDT

[#20]

I found this a few years ago when I was working nights. I don't think I have ever laughed so hard. I love his use of smileys.

Posted: 1/31/2011 5:43:52 AM EDT

[#21]

OP go look for the true porn clerk stories

Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile

Posted: 1/31/2011 6:47:58 AM EDT

[#22]

True or not, that was awesome. Thanks for the laughs, OP!

Posted: 1/31/2011 6:58:08 AM EDT

[#23]

SomethingAwful also once had a thread about a guy working for a rent-to-own place in Dayton, OH.

The unflattering things he said about Fairborn were spot-on.

Posted: 1/31/2011 7:01:04 AM EDT

[#24]

oh my gawd i'm on the raccoon story and i am already in tears this is the funniest shit ever.

Posted: 1/31/2011 7:04:52 AM EDT

[#25]

Wow, those are like 5+ years old right?

I remember reading those on my lunch breaks when I worked for the .gov and it hurt trying to stifle my laughter.

Posted: 1/31/2011 8:38:17 AM EDT

[#26]

Quoted:
In the OP's link, all pages after 3 are blank...even disabled NoScript and ctrl+F5'd the page. No idea what's up with that.

PDF version worked fine, thanks for the link.

Same thing happened here, thought something was up with my box maybe

Posted: 1/31/2011 8:40:29 AM EDT

[#27]

Quoted:
SomethingAwful also once had a thread about a guy working for a rent-to-own place in Dayton, OH.

The unflattering things he said about Fairborn were spot-on.

'sup, fellow goon.

Posted: 1/31/2011 8:43:13 AM EDT

[#28]

Tagged for later

Posted: 1/31/2011 9:04:38 AM EDT

[#29]

I dont know about his stories being true or not but they are really good either way. I can tell you this though , When going garbage when I was younger we have some crazy and funny stories. We almost got fired and banned from the dump for popping a wheelie in a garbage truck.

Posted: 1/31/2011 9:09:21 AM EDT

[#30]

Quoted:

Quoted:

SomethingAwful also once had a thread about a guy working for a rent-to-own place in Dayton, OH.

The unflattering things he said about Fairborn were spot-on.

'sup, fellow goon.

No, I'm not a goon.

Posted: 1/31/2011 9:12:32 AM EDT

[#31]

Tag for later.

Posted: 1/31/2011 9:39:05 AM EDT

[#32]

Never seen or heard of this. On page 3 and it just keeps getting better. thanks

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Chronicles of Bruiser, A look at the life of sweeper vac driver

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