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Posted: 4/19/2002 11:48:14 PM EDT
[url=http://www.satirewire.com/news/feb02/warship.shtml]Canada Warship Seizes Tanker in Arabian Sea[/url]


"Canada Warship Seizes Tanker in Arabian Sea" -- Reuters, Feb. 8, 2002

CANADIAN WARSHIP SEIZES TANKER IN... WAIT...
CANADA HAS A WARSHIP?
Oh Right, and Switzerland Has Nuclear Weapons

Arabian Sea (SatireWire.com) — Canadian television reported Friday that a Canadian warship in the Arabian Sea had seized a tanker suspected of smuggling oil from Iraq, leading many to suspect that the report was a hoax.

"You're kidding, right? Canada has a warship?" asked U.S. Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld. "Like for war?

"Does Canada know?" he added.

"Nobody was more stunned than we were," said Kali Omari, first mate of the seized vessel. "We saw this frigate steaming toward us, and we were worried, but then we saw the maple leaf on the flag, and we thought, 'Oh, Canadians. What the hell do they want?'"

When an officer of the HMCS Vancouver announced that the tanker was about to be boarded, the crew of the detained ship was confused, said Omari, but their confusion quickly turned to anger when they saw what the Canadians sailors were carrying.

"They were armed. With guns," said Omari. "Canadians. With guns. And a warship. What is this world coming to?"

"They were pretty rude, too," Omari added. "They started asking us all sorts of questions, like 'Where did that oil come from?' But first we wanted to know who gave them the damn warship."

According to Canadian defense officials, the Vancouver is one of four frigates deployed in the region to assist in the U.S.-led Afghanistan conflict. The tanker was stopped, officials said, because its cargo of crude oil violated United Nations sanctions, which prohibit Iraq from selling oil unless in exchange for food and medicine.

The U.N. said the incident is already under investigation, and promised swift action against those found responsible for giving the Canadians guns. Initial findings indicate that the Vancouver crew may have been watching too many American television shows.

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Copyright © 2002, SatireWire.


[img]http://www.satirewire.com/news/feb02/images/vancouver.jpg[/img]
The Halifax Class frigate Vancouver.  Honest.
Link Posted: 4/20/2002 12:04:17 AM EDT
[#1]
GO CANADA!!!!
Link Posted: 4/20/2002 4:45:16 AM EDT
[#2]
Link Posted: 4/20/2002 5:15:15 AM EDT
[#3]
...."armed with guns and rude....."

Nope, couldn't be Canadians.  (Unless they were also armed with Wart Hog Ale ?)
Link Posted: 4/20/2002 6:05:04 AM EDT
[#4]
LOL...sub..


You have seen pics of MY TOYS!!

Not all Canadians are sheep.
Link Posted: 4/20/2002 6:09:01 AM EDT
[#5]
Outboard motors and oars??? When did they convert from steam?

Right on! Way to go Canucks!

What's their armament? Water cannon and empty Moosehead bottles? [:D]

Just kidding...that was funny satire though,
[b][blue]NAKED[/blue][/b]
Link Posted: 4/20/2002 6:13:42 AM EDT
[#6]
Quoted:
LOL...sub..


You have seen pics of MY TOYS!!

Not all Canadians are sheep.
View Quote



I stand corrected!
Link Posted: 4/20/2002 6:24:06 AM EDT
[#7]
Link Posted: 4/20/2002 6:27:05 AM EDT
[#8]
Ok, this thread just made my morning!  I gotta show my canuck friends this!  Isnt it funny how Canadians have such a good sense of humor about Canada jokes?  Wouldn't find that in America!
Link Posted: 4/20/2002 6:33:23 AM EDT
[#9]
Quoted:
Isnt it funny how Canadians have such a good sense of humor about Canada jokes?  Wouldn't find that in America!
View Quote


True! And their Navy, although small, is very professional and well respected. They participate in the NATO exercises and are considered a formidable 'foe'.
Link Posted: 4/20/2002 6:41:16 AM EDT
[#10]
Link Posted: 4/20/2002 6:49:40 AM EDT
[#11]
Link Posted: 4/20/2002 7:12:23 AM EDT
[#12]
That would explain how a Canadian ship could be in the Arabic Sea....Too much Molson...LMAO...Outboard engine...No Oars...Steam engines...Chicken cannon...I am absoFU*&inglutely DYING !!!!



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