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Posted: 3/11/2002 9:20:43 PM EDT
[#1]
Let me know if these are inappropriate, and I'll take them off! [:)]
I wish all the ladies, were bells in a tower, and I was a bell-boy, I'd bang em by the hour. I wish all the ladies, were little pepperonis, and I were a pizza, I'd lay em all over me. I wish all the ladies, were pies on a shelf, and I was a baker, I'd eat em all myself. I wish all the ladies, were holes in a road, and I was a dumptruck, I'd fill em with my load. ***** Superman and I got into a fight, So I hit him on the head with some cryptinite, Hit him so hard, I squashed his brain, And now I'm f*cking Lois Lane. ****** And who can forget the one from "Heartbreak Ridge:" "Model A Ford and a tank full of gas, Hand full of p*ssy and a mouthfull of ass!" |
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Posted: 3/11/2002 9:24:32 PM EDT
[#2]
There's also one called "The S&M Man" but I [b]KNOW[/b] that one is inappropriate!
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Posted: 3/12/2002 1:30:13 AM EDT
[#3]
here's a task for you youngsters out there..
Write down all the songs, and all the jokes you hear while you're in the service. You could probably make a nice book after a couple years. I wish I could recall 1/10 of them! (heck,I'm having trouble recalling 2!!)[whacko] |
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Posted: 3/12/2002 1:32:35 AM EDT
[#4]
13 kids in a no-fire zone
Carrying books and going home Last in line goes home alone 'cause napalm sticks to kids.... Now I gotta find all the verses. I had them here someplace 20 years ago... |
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Posted: 3/12/2002 4:09:20 AM EDT
[#5]
....a-lo right lay-o,
a-lefty right-a-lo! |
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Posted: 3/12/2002 4:30:33 AM EDT
[#6]
Sme of my faves....
(running) Whip me, beat me, I need love Let me feel your leather glove Walk spike heels up and down my back Fishhooks through my scr*tum sack Whips and chains now they're a blast Come on baby spank my *ss *********************************** (running) UH-60 sitting on the strip Air Assault recon gonna take a little trip Mission top secret destination unknown 'Bout thirty miles north of Pan Mun Jom Stand up hook up lean into an "L" Bound right out and your on rappel Slip to your left, slip to the right Slide right down to a firefight See that commie on the hill Little slant eyed heathen I must kill If my M-16 won't do I'll bust him with some 7-6-2 Bite, kick, stomp his face Strangle him with my bootlace If he's still a fighting fool, I'll do him with my entrenching tool. ************************ My girl's a vegetable She lives in a hospital refrain: And I'll buy her anything To keep her alive She lives in an oxygen tent It's hell to pay the rent refrain She's got no arms or legs, Just got four wooden pegs refrain She's got no hair at all Looks like a bog cue ball refrain My girl has got no eyes, just two holes I s*d*mize refrain It goes down from there..... |
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Posted: 3/12/2002 5:56:17 AM EDT
[#7]
Drill Instructor Sgt. Meyers could really sing, and I mean SING, route cadence.
Lay ry lay ry yo hey do, yo hey left right, hi de lay o aye de left right layo hey da do yo hey da do Hey da do, hey da do Ay da left right, Lie oh. Oh hey da left right, Lie oh, Hey da do, Yo hay da do Repeat for miles on end, and never get tired of it. Then, for the aggressiveness factor there was: Burn the village! Rape and Pillage! Eat the babies! We don't mean maybe! I ate Junior with Tabasco Sauce Made his hooch a total loss Showed his Mama whose c**k was boss Buried his daddy underneath the moss! |
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Posted: 3/12/2002 6:08:02 AM EDT
[#8]
(chorus)
Buuurrrrnnn the village! Buuurrrrnnn the VIL-lage! Raaaape the women! Kiiilll the children! Burn the village, rrrape the women! Drop some Napalm on the square! Kill the people on a Sunday. WHILE THEY'RE ON THEIR WAY TO PRAYER! (repeat) That one was always seen as a little "politically incorrect". |
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Posted: 3/12/2002 10:31:23 AM EDT
[#9]
We had a big, BIG black southern baptist minister who was a DI in our company. He looked like the guy from "Green Mile". 1st Pl, C/co, 1st BN, 46th Inf, June-August '97 at Ft Knox. This guy had a voice that would take you away from it all on long hot company runs, and I swear when he was done singing, even Drill Sgt.Smith who fancied himself the Road Warrior in tanker boots and raybans would get all misty.
"Hey Hey Josephine, How do you do? Do you remember me baby, Like I remember you? You used to live over yonder' Beneath the rail-road tracks, and every time it rained, you used to call my name... Rock on, Rock on. Rock Rock Rock On Rock on, lets get it on..." |
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Posted: 3/12/2002 10:47:00 AM EDT
[#10]
When my grandma was ninetyONE
She ran PT just for fun When my grandma was ninetyTWO She ran PT better than you When my grandma was ninetyTHREE She ran PT just like me When my grandma was ninetyseven She ran PT all the way to heaven When my grandma was ninetyeight She ran PT through the pearly gates Also something about a caddillac and Casey Jones, a ditch or something... |
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Posted: 3/12/2002 10:57:14 AM EDT
[#11]
This is the way i heard it:
Rape and pillage Burn the village Drop the napalm Kill the Cong And from my friends dad: I dont know but its been said Air Force wings are made of lead I dont know but i've been told Navy wings are made of gold! FMJ: Mama and papa were layin in bed Mama rolled over and this is what she said A give me some PT, PT good for you, good for me so good, hmm good, mighty good good for you, good for me ho chi minh is a son of a bitch got the blue ball crabs and the seven year itch! |
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Posted: 3/12/2002 11:06:28 AM EDT
[#12]
With all you infantry nugs, I couldn't resist:
M1 tank I'm the king on the ground Grab the cadilacs spin the turret around there's a t-72 that I'm gonna nail Armor piercing sabot round up his tail Rollin down the tank trail kickin up dust TC's in the coupola raisin a fuss Gunners in the gunner seat pickin up a scan Loaders loadin sabot just as fast as he can There's a t-72 comin over the hill fifty wont get him but the main gun will gunner, sabot, now battlesight, tank I'll get the troops on the front left flank see some commie troops slippin through the grass send a burst of coax straight up their a** Crunch Crunch Crunch what a wonderful sound got a Grunt in the sprocket goin round and round |
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Posted: 3/12/2002 11:11:14 AM EDT
[#13]
And finally, my scout platoon's favorites:
My father was a terrorist my mother was a witch concieved in a back seat, born in a ditch raised in the ghetto by a wino named bill he taught me how to cheat, taught me how to kill ran with a street gang wore a leather coat late at night we'd pray to the goat commies and tankers they all must die late at night with a human sacrifice I know a girl that lives on a hill she won't do it but here sister will ring dang do what the f**k is that wet and furry like a pussy cat black and hairy and split in two that's what she called her ring dang do |
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