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You are unlikely to change the guys opinion; but you never know and it is always worth the effort.
I'd try discussing it with him (always calm and respectfully)- first making it clear that you are carrying legally and that this isn't going to change. Don't let him interrupt that part and finish by asking why he is uncomfortable with guns. This should do two things. It will put him on notice that he isn't making the rules at some level and it will change the discussion to a more general one about why he is uncomfortable about guns instead of whether you are carrying. It also makes it a defensive issue for him "What's wrong with you that you get so agitated around guns?". I advise being friendly and respectful and taking time to listen to whatever he has to say for three reasons: 1) Dealing with assholes is a part of life and shooting them will rarely be an acceptable solution. Ignoring them won't always be an option either. Better to start learning now how to neutralize them through experience. 2) You'll gain points with both women by literally "sticking to your guns" while not being an oaf about it. By being courteous you show class, at the same time you've asserted that you aren't giving up your rights on his say so. 3) You might just make a convert. Stranger things have happened. Often to take anyone who is interested shooting. You can color it from a safety angle "There are around 250 million guns in America which means you are going to run into another one. Don't you want to at least know good safety for your own protection?" If the guy fails to reciprocate with respect and still acts insecure (and believe me, a guy calling his girlfriend's roommate who he never met a "pussy" has some insecurity issues), then you've got a different problem to solve. In that case, I'd work on securing my own base of support (my girlfriend) first and then undermining his (his girlfriend). Being firm but cordial to everyone is a good way to do both. Smacking him in the head is probably a lot more satisfying emotionally but it just confirms the "violent gun maniac" image this guy is trying to lay on you and is going to cost you with both women I bet. I definitely wouldn't miss any opportunity to highlight his negative flaws if he won't play nice. In fact, I'm sure that if you think about it you can probably find ways to do it that are so subtle that he doesn't even know he's getting set-up. Drop me a line if you need some creative inspiration. |
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If you think there's no hope of meaningful discussion, above may be the best idea. Next time he asks, just slowly turn toward him, and give him an evil, slightly menacing grin. Speak not a single word. Then slowly turn and walk away. Or this may work, depending on the law in your state. SC law states that concealed carry means CONCEALED. In other words, you are required by law to NOT let other civilians know that you are carrying. No brandishing, partial showing, or even imprinting of the weapon on your clothes. If this is the case in your state, next time he asks, just tell him "State law prohibits me from revealing that information. But feel free to attack me and then find out." If you think there IS potential of meaningful discussion, next time he opens his pie hole, offer to take him shooting. Remind him that pretty universally, fear is based on IGNORANCE, and you would be willing to spend your valuable time to disspel his Dark Ages mentality about firearms. My $0.02 |
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His outlook is probably due to the fact that:
a) he's probably a convicted felon, or... b) he was just trying to get a rise out of you - and show how much of a "man" he is in front of his girl. If it were me, I'd have a little chat with my girlfriend as to how safe she feels in that apartment in the first place. If this guy's spending a lot of time there, she needs to have a nice, LONG chat with her roommate about how this guy needs to stay away, or that she'll be seeking a new residence. If confronted by this guy again, don't get pissed...or say or do anything to jeopardize your lady's safety (when you're NOT there). Stay calm, in control and follow your conscience (and the law) about dealing with a hostile act. Bottom line: tell the roommate to ditch the loser, or find a new place to live. |
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Debating with him over the politics of guns is a waste of your time. He will not be swayed because his problem isn't with the gun, it's with you. He wants to be the alpha male and is trying to show that he is in front of the females. He obviously wants to f*ck your girlfriend. There is only one solution. Whatever you have to do short of killing him or seriously injuring him do not let him get away with taking this stand. The confrontation will probably have to be a physical one on some level. I'm not saying you have to pick a fight with him. Most confrontations involving challenges of dominance among male animals are satisfied by posturing. You must be the alpha male. He has thrown down a challenge that must be answered. He has began a conflict in which only one can win. He must back down willingly or do so by force. If you can't accomplish that then you will have to leave the situation eventually. This analysis may sound a little strange but I believe that this is what your being confronted with. Regardless of your religious beliefs, people are animals. Men are male animals and if you understand how male animals interact then you can understand what this guy is trying to do.
Edited to add; I have come to my conclusions based on the fact that he first challenged your manhood(in front of your girlfriend) by saying "guns are for pussies". The fact that he did this when you were leaving speaks volumes. He was concerned about what your reaction might be. When you didn't react violently he was emboldened and ready to up the ante when you returned. He then tried to establish territory by calling the apt. "our house". This is a male dominance issue pure and simple. |
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Take off the NOMEX,we are all family here! |
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Some good points,I sure will use them especially the last two.Thanks! |
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Glock 19 in an Uncle Mikes "Sidekick" inside the pants holster size 15. In the winter I carry a Beretta 8000 cougar. It is concealable quite well but now that it is getting hotter out I need to get something smaller (because of less clothing) maybe a Glock 27? |
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Definitely sounds like this guys puffing his chest out to show how macho he claims to be in front of 'your' girlfriend.
So, go to the sporting goods store, buy an aluminum baseball bat. Drive to the house, lock your firearm up in the trunk. Go inside and go Brooklyn style Joe Pesci on his ass with the bat - All the time screaming - "betcha wish you had a handgun now?" Well, we can dream and smile can't we? Gonna be hard to avoid this weasel though - figuring hes gonna trash talk you whenever you arent there to your little lady. Play the 'nice guy' - brush it off and leave it at that. Youre not going to change this guys mind either way no matter what facts you throw his way. If your girlfriend pays his comments no mind and doesnt bring it up herself, she mature enough to know hes clearly an a-hole. She starts to question you carrying and exhibiting your rights - its time to find a new girlfriend. |
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Now there's ANOTHER appropriate wise ass response. Tell him "Gee, most felons who would like to rob or murder me are also against me carrying concealed. ARE YOU A FELON???" antiUSSA - Ingenious man. But I see a Springer episode coming out of that "solution." lurker - No. You have ALWAYS been evil. God told me so. Last week. |
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I didnt say ALL od UD was libreal,(although I think they areIMHO) But I said how most colleges were liberal. Im glad to hear your friend is getting into guns. X-ring is the best gun dealer I have ever came in contact with! Has your friend ever thought about saving just a little more and building his own AR instead of buying an AK?If he needs any help I would be glad to give it.I have nothing against AK's I do own two myself but why not try for the AR? BTW What range do you use up there? I usually go to the one in North East Md |
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Wolfpack got it right. The old parking lot ninja courtesy of Louisville Slugger...
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Always remember:
It is hard to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person. I say let him wallow in his own ignorance! |
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My initial reaction would probably have been to ask if he was a happy man... then remark that ignorance is bliss...
Remember, you can't argue with an idiot... they'll only take you down to their level and beat you with experience. I'd just try to always stay calm about it, be rational. If he brings it up or starts shit, tell him you obviously know more about the law, and that you are not doing anything illegal, and are not endangering anyone in any way. |
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I couldn't agree with this statement more. The only person who should know that you're carrying is you...in certain instances, a girlfriend, wife, or other partner who is a shooter and is trained in use of what you're carrying should know. My fiancee is not a shooter, and not a particularly big fan of firearms in general, but she knows that I carry occasionally. In fact, I actually carry CONSTANTLY, but she doesn't know unless her hand brushes my waistband. Even when she does "know" that my sidearm is there, she can't see it, and eventually forgets it. Never put yourself into a position where it might be discovered that you're carrying. The power you have in carrying - and no one else knowing - gives you the "upper hand" in any volatile situation you might encounter. The firearm itself isn't the most important thing though, it's just a last line of DEFENSE. The three main defenses you have are:
DO WHATEVER YOU CAN TO KEEP YOURSELF FROM GETTING INTO TROUBLESOME SITUATIONS IN THE FIRST PLACE. If this rule is followed, you may never have to draw your sidearm. That said, I'm never without, because "...you never know..." Regards, squibload |
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Have a threesome with his girlfriend and your GF, then have his GF tell him that you're definately no pussy!
I'm in lawschool also, where do you go and what year are you? Imagine him assuming that legally possessing a gun in an "unregistered" home equates to a car offense where EVERYONE GOES. (Or so they would have you believe!) Do not disarm yourself, you have as much a right to the apartment as he does and he has no right to lay down the law. Make sure everything is above board though, a bitch like him may just call the cops in hopes you are carrying illegally. Lastly, if he does call the cops, press charges against him for harrassment. Wouldn't hurt to get a restraining order either since you have knowledge about the legal system! Just make sure you bang his GF. |
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DAMN! What an analysis! Did you major in Psychology? You really hit the nail on the head man,This guy looks like and acts like a meathead so his primal instincts are mostly likely the cuase for this foolishness. I will stand my ground! |
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M4:
If I were you, I would simply point out that you don't insult people for excercising their rights. If he feels that you are breaking the law, simply invite him to try to get you busted for not having a "registered" firearm. If he challenges you about wearing the gun in "his" house, invite him to search you. If he is foolish enough to approach you, simply give him the look that says "You are about to make a grave and costly mistake." If that fails, just follow your heart and do whatever comes naturally. Better yet: If he is a bit of a hippie, I am sure that you could catch him engaging in illegal behavior during an unannounced return to the appartment. Nothing like "hello 911? There is a man here smoking weed. Yes, please hurry...here is his license plate and description..." Wouldn't that be fun? Remember...he started it. Not you. -White Horse edited to add: Simply agree with him. Say yes, guns are for *&^%. Agree with everything he says in a tone that tells him that his opinion doesn't count. Eventually he may tire of the game. BTW...what does your gf think of this guy? |
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Leave the gun in the car. Carry a bat. Sit in a chair holding the bat. Stare at him and ask if he feels safer now. Tell him you do since the bat doesn't make a sound.
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After being a cop for 14 years(and still going) you become somewhat of an amateur psychologist. I have spent years seeing people allow their most basic instincts guide their actions. Mainly because they lack the intelligence to control their instincts. Then again some instincts just can't be controlled. Be careful but don't back down if you value the relationship you have with your girlfriend. Women have their instincts as well, they instinctively want the alpha male whether or not they are willing to admit it. That's why the ones who are unable to control their instincts will go for the perceived bad boy. Enough psychology just handle your business.
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I forgot to mention, DO NOT SHOW HIM OR HIS GF YOUR GUN!!!! You don't want a queer like that saying you threatened him with it, then him being able to describe it, now would you? Tell your GF not to discuss it with her roomate either, it is not for public consumption.
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I just wanted to add a few points that may be helpful when you decide on what strategy to take when dealing with this guy. This guy sees you as the alpha male. The alpha male doesn't challenge for dominance he simply defends what he has already established. Somewhere along the line you have established your position. You have to figure out what you did and use that to your advantage. Maybe you were there first, maybe it's something his girlfriend said, maybe it's your education or financial situation. It could be something very innocuous that you don't even realize but it has made him feel threatened. Then again maybe something has happened to make your position seem vulnerable. If not he may be just testing the waters to see if you are vulnerable. The beta male will always challenge eventually. More often than not if they meet resistance from the alpha male they will find that they are not so committed to taking the lead role as they thought they were. |
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cool! coming from you, i take that as THE WORD. but i have to wonder, what took him so long? |
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Ask him if his gf giving you a topper is cheating on him.,It was good enough for slick willie!
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take your gun and if it is in your house or your g/f house while he is there, where it non-concealed. have a visable holster. just to annoy him.
how did he know you were paking in the first place? you didnt go bragging i assume. the first time you met him, how did he know to ask the second time if you were paking? |
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Girlfriend must have talked to her roommate, and room mate decides to tell her boyfriend. look you just need to tell that guy to back off, it is really none of his business. first of all it is not his house, second it is you right to have a CCW. ask him what exactly about you having that gun bothers him?? if he can't come up with a logical answer, then tell him to stick it where don't shine. of course, he will say some stupid reason, since you are a law student, I figure you are smart enough to comabt a idiot with idiot answer.
Remember, be logical, be rational, be calm. your action will either change a little of his anti gun attitude, or non at all, but it is much better then adding to his negetivity by being hostile. |
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I really half to question all of the "Just shoot him" and/or "Kick his ass" comments from a group of suppedly responsible firearms owners...
This would more than likely get you charged with a violent felony, then your problems are solved once and for all. I'm apalled at many of your responses, and once again this proves that my methodology would be the best measure of defense in this situation! |
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I have been in this situation before. My first reaction is to ask the individual to go to the shooting range with me before he makes any decisions about me. Make sure it is a range not just shotting in a field, since he will be more likely to resond postively when there are so many other owners and family there.
I have been very suprised with the "friends" of my girlfriend from New York that "hate" guns until I convert them at the range. If he is unwilling to go ask him how he can take such a hard line without first gathering FIRST HAND information on gun safety at the range. Don't argue just ask. When I do get these people to the range I start them out with a 22LR pistol, then glock 9mm, then Ruger 10/22, then 12 guage shotgun, and then as they feel comforitable all the way up to my AK47 or AR15. True it is a pain taking all these guns to the range but it is always worth it in the long run. You may be suprised how well it works, just don't be confrentational just ask him to go to the range. |
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good idea. can you take me to the range too? j/k |
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Citabria7GCBC,
If you were in AZ and a friend that I had to deal with, YES |
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As some other have already pointed out your response was incorrect. It is none of his concern. And more importantly you missed a great opportunity for a zinger. Here is your proper response for next time: Are you packing again? replies, Do you still hang out at gay bars? or Are you still crossdressing? or Do you still shower with your sister? Well, you get the idea. |
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Just tell him that you are exercising your god-given rights and if he is uncomfortable with that then he can leave. You don't run around trying to infringe upon his first amendment rights, as much as you might like to. You might also add that if guns are for pussies, you'd rather be a pussy than a corpse. Of course I would also allude to the fact that only a pussy could be so terrified of an inanimate object. |
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No need to engage in a discussion with this idiot. You're unlikely to change his stupid opinion.
Just be courteous...my guess is he's looking for trouble but will have brandishing or assault charges slapped on you if you give him any. It's none of his business whether you carry or not. I'd tell him that. If he persists, just tell him that opinions are like assholes, everbody has one. Then, ignore him and remain aloof. That really tends to piss that type of guy off. Don't be outwardly aggressive but show a quiet confidence that you can and will kick his ass if you have to. That will shut him up. He sounds like a child that needs a good spanking, treat him as such. YOU control the dynamics of the interaction, and he'll get the message not to screw with you. |
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I have to say pistol whipping the motherfucker is a lost art now-a-days. I do agree, becoming a pimp, and slapping both asses is a nice idea. Just keep up a stead supply of Ginesic. c-rock |
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This guy won't be impressed with the truth! I wouldn't argue or debate with him. Let him be an @ss while you quitely exercise your rights with confidence. Sooner or later hel'll run out of emotions and maybe you can have a civilized discussion.
Maybe leaving a target laying around with a ragged hole for the bullseye might intimidate him? Good luck, Shok |
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MY FRIEND: I'm a little nervous around the weaponry -- can you put it in storage or something while I'm there? I mean, I know you know how to use it, but it would be just my bad karma to accidently shoot myself with Tyra or something.
ME: We can constrain your hands with rope or duct-tape so you won't be able accidentally to shoot the guns. |
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tell them well theres a bunch of pussies out there and I just want to be on the same level.
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I wouldn't even give him this much attention, don't bother. I would just tell the creampuff to mind his own business, if he continues to hound you about it, have your girlfriend kick his ass |
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Please commence thread. |
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Ignore him, diffuse the situation, Your girlfriend might get catch heat if he decides to make trouble. It does sound like he has made up his own mind. (and his own laws)In a similar situation my (former) roommates boyfriend always confronted me about the some minor petty stuff. (not that your situation is petty) Maybe it's some kind of roommates boyfriend syndrome. It sounds like he would you to take action so he can alert the authorities to prove his manliness to himself.
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I wish my life were half as cool as your imagination. |
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First, If I ever got called to a scene over some "boyfriend with a gun in my girlfriends house" and found out it was all legal and he was just hanging out, I would tell this jackoff to mind his own business. Second, since its not his house I would tell the guy either put up with it or pound sand. Third, I would ask him, "If you think guns are for pussys, then I must be a pussy. Do you want to come outside and say that to my face?" Hmmm, don't think he'd take me up on that. Liberal pukes. I think I would most definately agree with the person who said "have a nice cup of Shut the F**k up! Or just kick his ass. which ever is easier.
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(really good info snipped to save space)
This is the best series of advice I have seen on this thread so far. I'd go with it, to the letter. Like he said, be the better, more rational, more mature guy who doesn't resort to cheap shots and emotionalism to get a point across. There's really not much either of you can do about each other. Eventually when he sees his idiocy no longer gets a rise out of you, and/or he realises that having somebody around with a gun who is not a whackjob/criminal is a good idea, then he'll shut up. Frankly, I would like to know why he's so paranoid- maybe he has something in his background HE'd like to keep covered up?..... Remember, nobody can abuse you without your permission. If nothing else works, just ignore him. ........................... Too many people simply give up too easily. You have to keep the desire to forge ahead, and you have to be able to take the bruises of unsuccess. Success is just one long street fight. - --Milton Berle Edited to add: I agree to the letter also with Sukebe's psychological take on the stuation (Sukebe- you should have a PhD in psych- no kidding!), but I'm not sure on his recommended methodology for solving the immediate dilemma. As a member of a professional field in which your record has to be as clean as a hound's tooth, you'd better think long-term about what's more important. Discretion may be the better part of valor- you don't want some two-bit deep fat frier jockey to possibly get your name on some police blotter- or worse- because your attempt to "put him in his place" back-fired. If you also feel you have to confront this dork to save face with your GF, then it's time for a new GF. Life is too short. |
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maybe says something like
"your fucktard, wanna-be-victim opinion doesn't much matter to me" or "if you have to be a pussy to want to have the most effective means to protect yourself, then I'm a pussy. And you are what you eat" |
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First tell him to mind his own business and don't worry about what you carry or don't. If he pushes the point again tell him to mind his own business. Since you have a legal right (I suppose a CCW) ignore him.
If he wants to get into a debate over gun rights go for it. The take him shooting is also a good way to change his mind. If he shoots a gun his attitude will change. He might even buy a AR or something. The most important thing is stay cool, laugh and walk away if he is hard headed. I guess this is off Campus housing? I don't know if you are allowed to carry on a University or a on Campus Dorm. Check the law worse case is this guy will be an As$ Hole and cause trouble for you. Stand by your rights don’t tell your Girlfriend to move your giving in then. Most of all she should not have said anything. CCW means well you know. I don't want anyone knowing what I got |
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Never argue with an idiot, they will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience. |
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This is somewhat off topic.
Sounds like you need to have a talk with your girlfriend and tell her to keep quiet about you carrying. It is best that noone knows you are carrying IMHO. Don't you just hate liberals though...? |
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FWIW- I have a friend who was walking his own property when two A-holes on ATVs rode by (and very close to) him. He caught up with these guys down the trail as they stoped to eat some twinkies and throw the trash on the ground. My friend informed them that this was private (his) property and he wanted them to leave. These guys were so ballsy that they tried to tell him this was THEIR trail. He took out a cell phone and told them he was calling the police. At this point one of the guys rushed my friend who retreated until he was able to draw his S&W 686. At this point the A-holes decided to ATV-on-out-of-there. My friend was never able to get a signal on his cell but when he got home he called to police to report the trespassers. The next evening a cruiser shows up in his driveway. At first my friend was impressed that the police had come out in person to make out a report. He soon found out that the two A-holes had called the police as well and given them a sob story about how they had become lost and had stopped to try and find the trail back to the main road when "a crazy man started screaming obcenities at them and then pulled a gun and talked about how he hadn't killed anybody in almost a week and was starting to get an itchy feeling!" My friend told the cops the real story and punched holes in the report the A-holes gave but all the cops seemed to focus on was whether or not my friend owned "a big silver revolver" It ended with the cops "warning" him against brandishing a firearm (remember this IS his land). So I wouldn't do anything to provoke this guy. Make a point of asking your GF for "permission" everytime you enter HER apartment. Also, make a point of having friendly witnesses whenever this guy is around. Does your GF have an interest in learning to shoot, owning or carrying? That may tip the scales. Hey, How about offering to take your GF's roomate (the Dick's GF) out to the range to educate her?
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